<p>LOL. His partner’s record is spotless. Epistrophy, your point is well taken. I couldn’t reach the LTC but I reached her again; I did NOT tell her about the Board of Medicine reprimand; if she didn’t know about it then what would be the point considering she has been his patient for 15 months…makes no sense at all to upset the woman…anyway, she had very advanced cancer, multiple mets, and she was very, very sick, and then a remission for several months, and now a recurrance. But I asked her what feels like 100 questions about his office staff, staff turnover, competency, etc., and got all the right answers…</p>
<p>LTS,
my gut is saying these things are not a big deal… I know of at least 1 great doctor in Maine who stopped practicing because of all the rules and the energy it took away from his ability to practice medicine. This doctor now knows of your concerns… how did you feel about his own response? Was he excessively defensive or was he comfortable within his own skin as he answered? </p>
<p>Be patient as you finish your gathering of information… your are doing a great job…</p>
<p>And as you have said, along with so many others, CC is a wonderful sounding board… what a wonderful subset of vantage points… lots of educated, caring people… it is kind of an interesting advantage to put things out into the ether…and see what you catch isn’t it? Electronic fishing, if you will… I love the consistent voices here in your thread…and at CC in the parents cafe and forum in general…</p>
<p>LTS, Is the problem that doctors inserted the IVs, or that foreign doctors who were not yet licensed in the US did it? In either case, I would not be very concerned about this. You may be able to verify the story by seeing the public reprimand, or getting details from the reporting company. The important thing is that he did not compromise anyone’s medical care, assuming the facts are correct. Given his good reputation, and the “tests” that he passed with you, I would go ahead. </p>
<p>I would also not fault him for the side effects of the long-term patient. As epistrophy said, she was very sick and probably wouldn’t have survived with most doctors. I take it she is also much older than you are? What is a LTC?</p>
<p>If I were you, I would go ahead with confidence.</p>
<p>As a dear friend of mine says, “The final evidence is never in.” At some point you just have to trust. Maybe that’s the biggest challenge for you, if I’m not overstepping my saying this.</p>
<p>This doctor sounds more promising, and if he enjoys a good reputation, I think you should go ahead with him. JMO.</p>
<p>You do not want someone who is not willing to consider other alternatives and already thinks he knows the negative outcome of your case.</p>
<p>If it were me, I would go with this new doc.</p>
<p>Whatever you decide, we’re with you.</p>
<p>If you got all the right answers, that is very encouraging. I also agree with Epistropy. The problem with much of medicine is that there can be unwanted side effects. This is another reason to read and weigh all of the pros and cons before making decisions. Often a small risk is worth the possible benefits. Just because some treatment has a side effect for someone does not make it commonplace for everyone (might happen to 1 out of 100, or 1 out of 1000, etc.). If you are the one with a bad side effect, of course percentages no longer matter, it happened to you.</p>
<p>Sometimes when I am “cognitively locked in”, i.e., stuck over-thinking things, it helps to turn to my body for some feedback. Try this mental exercise. Really, really try to feel as though you have decided this doctor (the one with the reprimands) is the one you will go with. Pretend the decision is made - the die is cast. How do you feel physically? Is it a relief? Are your muscles relaxing? Are you ready to just kick back and stop all this endless thinking and have a nice evening? Or, do you desperately feel trapped. Now, let a few hours (generally a day or two, but I know you are pressed for time) and do the mental exercise with the dreadful-you-are-going-to-die- future doctor (or someone else, whatever). Same mental exercise, same questions about your body. </p>
<p>Generally, if I stop thinking and just say, well I’ve decided this (or that) for one of the decisions my body is saying no, no, I want a do over. For me, I generally go with my gut (or heart, or whatever organ you want!). Maybe this would be a helpful thought exercise?</p>
<p>If you want a really short version of it try flipping a coin with heads for the caring doc (with reprimands) and tails for the cold doc (with high recommends). If every time you get tails (or heads, whatever) you want to keep trying, well, then, you can see where your heart is leading you.</p>
<p>And to second someone many pages back, we all really, really like you and are very, very grateful for you letting us share in your life.</p>
<p>great advice delicate arch – I think – along the “Blink” – follow your gut instinct. And an interesting way to bring this conversation around to the college admissions process (see moderators, it is relevant!) – same concept applies when acceptances arrive. LTS – your heart will tell you where to go. We are here for you.</p>
<p>^^^ Delicate Arch, thanks for joining in this thread. I see that you are a recently emerged poster and am glad you have taken the plunge!</p>
<p>LTS, you can see from the number of posts and views how many people here care for you and want things to work out for you. This thread is a testament to a very special community caring about a very special member!</p>
<p>And that is in addition, of course, to those in “the rest of your life” (outside of CC) who are supporting you as well.</p>
<p>P.S. Re the relevance to college admissions:
1- CC is fine with non-college admissions discussions in the Cafes. That’s what the Cafes are for, and the mods are totally supportive of this thread in particular.
2 - Personally, I feel that this thread helps the rest of us keep the whole college admissions thing in perspective. (And I say this as the parent of a high school senior going through the process!)</p>
<p>Thank you all for your thoughtful contributions.</p>
<p>The new revelations are of interest, but, personally, I haven’t yet heard anything about the new doc that would make me go against a strong gut feeling in his favor.</p>
<p>I’m staying with my decision to go with the new man, reprimands and all. He does come recommended, has been in practice for a long time, and this reprimand thing isn’t a patient risk issue - it’s an operational issue. And there are no other issues in over 25 years of practice, and his partner is spotless. </p>
<p>I have known since the very beginning that winning this fight would mean that there would have to be some envelope pushing, or something different, etc. than the standard of care because the standard of care result is that 95% of people die of this diagnosis. </p>
<p>Delicate Arch, being around the highly credentialed guy that was yesterday’s choice scares the living daylights out of me. When I was in his office Tuesday, talking to him, I literally broke out in a cold sweat, just from being in the same room with him.</p>
<p>Glad you have made that decision, LTS. And it sounds like the right one.</p>
<p>I pray you can now breathe and let the weight of this slide away for a time. You are where you need to be to fight this fight, I am sure!</p>
<p>lts: I think we all concur that you have made a wise choice. I hope tonight brings sleep.</p>
<p>Will continue to pray.</p>
<p>Delicate Arch, thank you for that decision-making process, which will help many others, as well as LTS. I am sure that I am not the only one who will keep it in mind for later.</p>
<p>LTS, I guess you have your answer. A cold sweat trumps a lack of reprimands!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Exactly. Good analysis. Now move forward with confidence and due diligence and don’t look back at the guy who scared you. Over, done with. Sleep well tonight, LTS. We are all here with you.</p>
<p>Amen…</p>
<p>good night John Boy…</p>
<p>good night Ben…</p>
<p>good night Erin…</p>
<p>good night LatetoSchool…</p>
<p>good night new Doctor…</p>
<p>Good Night Moon…</p>
<p>maineparent, thanks for the laugh! (and the tears - I have fond memories of Goodnight, Moon…)</p>
<p>Sleep well, LTS.</p>
<p>maineparent: That was perfect!</p>
<p>Goodnight, Mary Ellen</p>
<p>(me too, loved that show)</p>
<p>Goodnight cow jumping over the moon… :)</p>
<p>LTS, this goes back a few pages of posts, but I just want to say that I am glad you have had the wisdom and foresight to put your daughter on your bank accounts and assuming some of the bill paying responsibility now, for a number of reasons. This gives you peace of mind for a number of eventualities – even a short-term hospitalization could be very stressful if there are bills piling up at home. This removes a big worry plus gives you a good ally in a situation where things can get very complicated and time consuming – it can be very hard to track down which parts of which bills have been paid or should be paid by insurance, what has already been paid & what is outstanding, etc. So its useful to have someone else on the job simply keeping track of it all. </p>
<p>I don’t know about you, but my daughter is much more organized than I am and she is obsessive about paying bills on time. So if your d. is at all like mine, I would feel very confident to have her in charge of my finances.</p>