Sorry I missed this thread while on vacation.
I have a virtual niece (child of our best friends; I’ve known her since before she was born; the families had at least one meal per week together while our children were growing up) who was a 2014 CS graduate from Carleton (actually, a double major in Linguistics and Computer Science). Carleton was by far the weakest college on her final list in CS. She chose it over others (including Carnegie-Mellon SCS and the University of Chicago) because she liked the feeling on campus and because she thought it would give her more opportunities (vs. CMU and vs. engineering-school programs elsewhere) to double-major.
Things worked out perfectly for her. She got exactly the job she hoped she would coming out of college. Carleton in fact did not have the faculty to meet her needs fully, but what it did was to fund her to do summer research with CS faculty at a major university elsewhere. She continued to work with them remotely when she returned to Carleton, and they helped her enormously in taking the next step in her career.
She is not a hard partier by any stretch of the imagination, but she enjoyed the social life at Carleton. She’s shy, more than a little nerdy, and not flirty at all; none of that prevented her from making good friends and feeling satisfied with her life there.
In my community, liberal arts colleges are very popular and well respected. Carleton, Swarthmore, and Vassar are all basically seen as peers here. Swarthmore is the snootiest of them, and the most high-pressure, but Carleton is also seen as a very high-quality academic environment, and Vassar, too. Oberlin is also very popular, and well-respected, but somewhat less intense than the other three (not necessarily a bad thing). I probably know more people, ages 30-65, who went to Oberlin than people who went to Swarthmore, notwithstanding that Swarthmore is a 20-minute commuter train ride away, and Oberlin is about 600 miles away. People are aware of Grinnell, but I don’t know anyone who has gone there.
My sister-in-law was a visiting professor at Swarthmore a few years ago. Her home institution is a large public university, and she found Swarthmore very staid and boring, with mainly wealthy, privileged students. It’s true that Swarthmore students don’t actually take much advantage of the consortium for classes, but it would definitely be possible to take the train in to Penn periodically to work at a lab or hospital there. I think it’s significantly more awkward to get anywhere interesting on a regular basis from Carleton (Minneapolis-St. Paul), Oberlin (Cleveland), or Vassar (NYC), but weekend day-trips are doable. Grinnell . . . there’s no place easy to get to from there.
Fundamentally, though, there’s no academic/reputational difference among the schools that would be worth spending a lot more money for, or going with a coach you like less.