Teenage motivation struggles

@kirroyalemum It’s tooooo early for HER to think about college, or to visit college, or to talk about college. She will not be starting college for another 5 years. She’s only been on this earth for 13 years. Let her forget about college for a couple of years. I’d hold off on taking her to visit colleges, unless she asks. Junior year is a good time to start.

I work with high school students on test prep and college essays. I see dozens of students, year in, year out. I can tell which kids are interested in the college process, and which kids are not. It will be no surprise to say that the majority of kids have little interest until they are juniors, and many simply go through the motions, either to appease parents, or because they resign themselves to their fate. The kids who are hassled by parents are definitely the hardest to motivate.

I went to a meeting for school parents once when I had middle schoolers. Some of the parents wanted more homework etc.

I remember saying that their brains and bodies are under construction and that the priority is food and sleep. Honest.


Don’t mention college, heard.

She came in the room today and told me she is trying out for the high school…cheerleading team. I am shook. Of course, her friends are also trying out. I am super excited for her. I hope there are more and more opportunities for her to try all the things. I think she might even attend the school-wide sports meet-and-greet. This week gives me hope.


IME boys don’t seem to mind stinky girls. :slightly_smiling_face:


Please refer back to my post… Lol… Lots and lots of dance girls go out for cheer…hope she makes it and has fun. Fun is the important part :blush:

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You’ve gotten good advice. Is there a reason for her not to switch to the dance studio/class her friends are in? Maybe a less competitive studio would be a better fit? I would want my kid to be active more than an hour a week if possible. If she complains about dance, would she be open to something like track or as others have said cheer?

And yes to getting involved in at least one activity/club at school that requires a relatively high level of involvement - not just a meeting once a month. And if the club doesn’t require it, perhaps community service through school or the community. Not for college apps, but as a way to participate in her community.

Hope she finds her path and her people in HS.