I like the Visa or Amex card idea with a thoughtful note.
The Visa cards are difficult to use. My grocery store doesn’t take them. I have never has an Amex gift card.
I was think Nordstrom because she could always use the card at their spa if she didn’t want to buy something.
Anybody that took my D to the ER and sat with her for 12 hours would get a pretty big thank you from me! I’d send at least a $100 Amazon gift card and a big bouquet of flowers (or chocolates, depending on suggestions from your D). And I’d probably also send a handwritten note in a thank you card.
BTW, Visa gift cards suck. I’ve gotten them before and hate them.
My dd just took to her roomie to the er and sat with her for hours. It wouldn’t occur to us that roomies mom would give her a gift.
She could use the Nordstrom card on-line as well as in-store. Nordstrom offers free shipping and free return shipping with no minimum purchase (though the Rack’s policy is different).
I don’t like Visa gift cards, either. In my volunteer job I tried to help a gentleman in distress make a purchase using Visa gift cards and it was a royal pain. The business would not accept multiple Visa gift cards for a single purchase and one card wouldn’t cover the cost.
OP, might you want to ask your D if she thinks Nordstrom is a good idea? Most of the sorority girls I’ve known would have been delighted with such a gift. There are many options for the recipient at Nordstrom: shoes, athletic gear, work or casual attire, cosmetics, candles/decor, or even gifts for her family members.
I don’t think a graduation gift would be better unless you were planning to give her a graduation gift before your daughter’s emergency. As for the amount, two of my daughters took friends to the emergency room during their college years. Both would have been extremely uncomfortable receiving a $100 gift card for doing something a friend would do for a friend. (I don’t think parents in either instance sent them any gifts afterwards.) It’s too much money and negates the good feeling one has has when they can truly help someone. A sincere written note will be treasured because in this age of email and texting few people take the time to write thank you notes. If you feel you just have to give her something, a modest, $50 at the most, giftcard to a local pizza place would be great. She could share a meal with friends. If you took your neighbor to the ER and stayed, how would you feel if she gave you a giftcard to Nordstroms? I’ve taken my neighbor to the ER twice, both times staying until the wee hours when she was discharged. Her gratitude (and good health) was more than enough reward for me.
That’s just my opinion. Sometimes I think people today just do not want to accept help without feeling they owe something for it. Really, being needed and being sincerely appreciated is a gift.
As a person who may err on the generous side, I’d want to give a “large” gift. But I hope I could talk myself out of it and send a box of homemade baked goods, dorm treats or a local restaurant or movie theater gift card with a note of thanks. I have never wanted to make our generosity a variable my kids’ friendships or relationships. Our daughter would not have minded a warm gesture to her friend under these circumstances, but would have been mortified by a “statement” gift.
Perhaps consider letting the gesture of appreciation be a match for the intent of the act of friendship and leave extra space for your daughter to express her thanks. And if, at graduation, you wish to make additional moderate gesture, have at it. I am slowly coming to believe that less is more and the context in which big gifts are viewed is not always what I assume it will be.
YMMV. How great that your daughter has quality friendships in her life.
@eyemamom, if wouldn’t occur to your daughter – but if the tables were reversed and it was roommie who took your daughter to ER wouldn’t you feel grateful? Wouldn’t you be comforted by the idea that your daughter has someone she can count on? That’s why OP wants to give a gift - because she’s a mom – a mom of a child who needed help/companionship, and got it. Plenty reason for a warm thank you with a little gift enclosed!
But hey, that’s just me. I like giving gifts even more than receiving them.
I bet the recipient of a $100 gift card in this instance would react by telling the OP’s daughter, “OMG! Your mom is so sweet!”
Not, “Are you trying to compensate me for my time?” or, “This is a statement gift I cannot accept!” or, “I really would have preferred that your mother contribute $50 toward my favorite charity,”
I think it is a nice idea and any amount would be a nice surprise. If you want to give more, do it. I don’t know a college student who wouldn’t like a surprise gift card. Don’t worry about which store it is for or whether she usually shops there.
I would be grateful and maybe have d take her out to dinner, but no, I wouldn’t pay her friend for it.