<p>I do, I do.</p>
<p>Tell me about your Tennessean Adventures. I need a nice story.</p>
<p>Here’s an Illinoisan story. My lab partner in APES is hot. Yay!!!</p>
<p>To be continued…</p>
<p>Hello Hello Hello</p>
<p>Sometimes, Mike. Sometimes…</p>
<p>No Tennessean adventures. Tomorrow we have a pep rally. Maybe tomorrow.</p>
<p>Oh, snoop. You used to talk about SB all the time.</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>My English teacher is a bouchedag.</p>
<p>All English teachers are ■■■■■■ bags, it’s a fact of life.</p>
<p>Either stupid or that, yes they are. I like my new word, bouchedag.</p>
<p>Obama is on the telly.</p>
<p>You aren’t British snoop. No matter how much Harry Potter you read, it’s not going to happen. I know. I tried.</p>
<p>You LIE!</p>
<p>In the 7th grade my teacher showed us the old Bridge to Terabithia movie and Jess just busted out with particular phrase after being told Leslie died, weird intonation and everything. It really truly made my day.</p>
<p>You should be thankful I took the time to explain all that to you. You’re welcome.</p>
<p>Thank you.</p>
<p>So this stereotypical 4.0 violin-playing science Olympiad Asian girl is also applying early to Stanford at my school. Doesn’t she know that’s my territory? Some people show no respect…</p>
<p>You should bribe her with galbi. Leave a trail of it like in Hansel and Gretel to Canada.</p>
<p>No one would ever think to look in Canada.</p>
<p>Sounds like a plan.</p>
<p>If only I had a large supply of galbi and a map to Canada. But maps to imaginary places don’t really exist.</p>
<p>Sound reasoning, sound reasoning.</p>
<p>So I do get an apush book. Maybe. Probably.</p>
<p>Lies. There are no books in Tennessee besides the bible and cookbooks.</p>
<p>Mostly bibles.</p>
<p>You would laugh if you knew how many churches were within a 5 mile radius of me.</p>
<br>
<br>
<p>I had to read the bible for school. I have to say, it was kind of ridiculous in parts. Did you know all the people in genesis lived for like 900 years?</p>
<p>Something like that. I don’t really know. At least 10-15.</p>
<p>I used to go to one of those crazy southern baptist churches, Chicagoan. Actually, not that crazy. But I liked my Korean church so much more, even though I haven’t been there since I was, like, 7.</p>
<p>The crazy southern baptist churches that sing exuberantly, or the crazy southern baptist churches that protest at soldier’s funerals?</p>
<p>Neither. It was actually not that bad. Lots of southern people and their whiny children and …No, it was bad. Too many words describe it.</p>
<p>The crazy baptist churches that protest soldiers’ funerals are frakking media whores and sons of guns and many other things that I cannot adequately express.</p>