<p>Cheers - BTW welcome back from whatever remote spot you went too… Oh yes. So is Aludaughter interested in neuroscience. Now AluD is going somewhere without a medical school, but with an amazing molbio program. Yes. For those in the sciences taking that deep breath and girding ones loins is a worthwhile endeavour. Yes, CMdge, we will handhold for the accomplice. And it sounds like Mudgie has that resilient bounce back quality we like to see in pistol pants girls…It’s brutal on the parents some times but a quality to nurture nonetheless. Hang in there. Go on more visits if you can. Write trip reports:).</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Cur, I’m sure you’ve already seen it but just in case it fell through the cracks Carolyn’s website has a link to the site that lists a variety of “automatic” scholarships that would clearly meet the no-hassle policy. Most of them are not in the same league as the schools that your D seems to be looking at, though. One exception might be Washington College, which is fairly close to Baltimore/DC, has a Neuroscience concentration <a href=“http://psychology.washcoll.edu/bn.html[/url]”>http://psychology.washcoll.edu/bn.html</a>, has a GREAT record of med school admissions <a href=“http://www.washcoll.edu/wc/news/washmag/winter2002/02_winter_23.html[/url]”>http://www.washcoll.edu/wc/news/washmag/winter2002/02_winter_23.html</a>, has a growing rep, and gives away a boatload of scholarship money.</p>
<p>Glad she’s back in the game!</p>
<p>Not sure about the neuro dept, but Allegheny has good merit aid AND a NO ESSAY app with a fast track, two week response–if your stats meet the criteria.</p>
<p>Once her main essays are done, the supplementary essays are cake. Mostly at common app schools it is a version of: “Why College X?” If you have done your research and know what you like about the school, this question answers itself easily. IMHO, they are not looking for anything other than that you “get” their school and the app is a thoughtful one.</p>
<p>I will share my strategy about getting D to include a few more schools on her list: just compare the school you want her to include to one of the safeties on her list: lets say you were admitted to Safety X and This School, and the COA was the same. Which would you rather attend?</p>
<p>When the main two essays are done the rest of the app usually takes about 20 minutes. Really.</p>
<p>SBmom, I don’t know that she’s back in the game but at least she didn’t run all the way out of the park. She said this weekend she was going to work on her common app essays, and get all the fill-in the blank stuff done on her two public, rolling admissions, non-CA schools. I’m just happy not to see the Tyler Junior College or Jarvis Christian brochure.</p>
<p>I wonder if essay-writing horror is the prime mover here.</p>
<p>Cur - We’ve had a similar experience at our house. I’ve backed off and it seems to have worked. School just started yesterday and I see a renewed vigor in DS eyes. I think the past month has just been a “breather” and am interested to see how the beginning of school goes. I think the competitive juices will start flowing again. I’ll bet you see the same.</p>
<p>Curmudgeon, do not be so hard on yourself! There is no good way to prepare anyone for the experience … you just live through it. </p>
<p>The whole process is one huge up and down, especially if you allow the size of the project to mushroom and spin out of control. You and CMD will also find that the decisions after acceptances could even be more difficult. In the meantime, taking small positive steps is one the best ways to proceed. In my opinion, it really does not help to try to micromanage the process and write down ALL the assignments on a spreadsheet. That tends to make it look a giant mountain to climb. It is better to decide on smaller and manageable parts.</p>
<p>For instance, please tell your D NOT to try writing a perfect essay or start a crusade to get them ALL done. It is better to jot down a few ideas, favorite images, and let 400-500 words find their place on paper. Remember that a good essay may be nothing more than a small slice of real life. The first draft does not have to be super polished. Leaving a couple of essays on the drawing for a few weeks could work very well. Tell your D to look for simple ideas and tell her to THINK about her essays as she would tell a nice story to her best friend. Letting the process develop over time makes is easier to swallow. CMD may find out that what she sees as one gigantic essays becomes four or five small ones that all do the job. Soon enough, she should be able to crank them out as a pro. </p>
<p>As far as the process goes, I found it much easier when focusing from the bottom up. As they say on CC, love thy safeties. Some schools have really, really simple applications, especially for rolling admissions. Even if a couple of safeties are not on CMD’ most favored nation status, it may be the best $50-75 to spend. For instance, ASU gives a student an almost automatic answer and identifies your finaid pretty quickly -and that may go all the way to a free ride PLUS stipend. It is a great relief to know that at least one school loves you! Since your daughter wants to stay out of Texas, Tulane and your favorite Arkansas school would go a long way in making the process less tiresome and frustrating. Along the way, applying to matches and reaches becomes easier and less overwhelming. FWIW, I made the decision to forego any early applications and only applied RD. On the one hand, I lost the benefit of knowing my fate by Christmas, but on the other hand, I could look at four solid months between September and January 1 to check my applications that were in various stages of completions. At the end, I only applied to 5 schools and approcahed the January to April 1 with great serenity. I knew I would be happy at any of the five schools. By the time, April 1 came, I knew where I would go. The only hard part was to notify the schools that I would not attend as each one of them had grabbed a small part of my heart. </p>
<p>Lastly, you may also find out that a few scholarship -and some of the most valuable- are NOT advertised anywhere. The admission’s offices have a “reserve” coming from foundations that have specific objectives. The schools have to nominate the students and you cannot apply without the nomination. One such scholarship is offered by the Terry Foundation and only funds students at a few Texas colleges. My point here is that there is merit and need based aid that is not advertised and that applications and essays may be added after you send some applications. A school that may not look that great for finaid may have a few aces up their sleeves. One more reason to start with the simple one first. :)</p>
<p>Thanks folks. It’s helping and I agree with all of you. I was able to avoid the topic with D for the last 24 hours. Maybe 36. I’m heading out to duct tape my mouth shut right now.</p>
<p>And Alu, the answer to your question is only 50% of it is essay horror. The other 50% is short answer horror.</p>
<p>And the third 50% is just general overwhelmed horror?</p>
<p>My guess is that the other 50% third is the fear of leaving the non-stop SNL skit mudgie lives in. </p>
<p>Really. Freshman dorms aren’t going to come close to cur’s general level of humour and panache.</p>
<p>Thanks, cheers. I appreciate it. </p>
<p>I don’t know where she’ll end up but if I’ve done anything right, she will go there with a sense of humor. And , if I get lucky, an intact sense of wonder.</p>
<p>As someone said earlier on another thread, W and I have started our first “last times”. Last time we go to “Meet the Band”. Last time we…</p>
<p>This year could really get maudlin, couldn’t it? Somebody beat me with a mop handle if I need it, will you?</p>
<p>O.K. Shopping list. Mop handle. Duct tape…</p>
<p>…box or two of tissues…</p>
<p>Curmudge - this year coming up is, in many ways, unmitigated h*** - the lasts, the emotional storms, the parties, it is a looonnnnggg year, but over so very fast!</p>
<p>Cur - It’s like childbirth. After a year or two all that screaming and yelling is forgotten and you’re ready to do it again. Hope W is sympathetic to your condition.</p>
<p>Just some thoughts - Has her school started yet? Is she (or will she be) loaded down with AP classes? That seemed to be a stresser at my house. Plus, she’s had a very rough summer. Her reaction to all of this doesn’t seem to be really out of whack to me. </p>
<p>p.s. There’s always Grayson County Community College. Denison is lovely this time of year.</p>
<p>Grayson Community College in Denison. Hmmm. If you say it fast, people might think Ohio, huh? You may be on to something.
</p>
<p>D has not only started school, she has her first test tommorrow. AP Bio test on Friday. She has three college courses, Brit lit (on-line), Calculus B(online) and Economics. Plus AP Bio, some CIS thing-y, speech, Varsity athletics IV, and Marching Band. (No time -eaters in that schedule , huh?)</p>
<p>Curmudgeon:
taking my child back tomorrow for start of sophmore year… checked CC just to see if there were any hints for repacking etc that might make this easier, faster etc…
then I saw this thread…and felt compelled to post a supportive answer like the other “seasoned” veterans that have already posted… </p>
<p>My immediate reaction when I read this in your post:</p>
<p>“The last few days we were engaged in the process of lining out work to be done , deadlines, which essays would fit where, short answers ,supplements, merit scholarship apps and more essays, honors college apps and more essays, graded analytical papers when she just hit the wall. Much like some others have felt recently, D has just had it.”</p>
<p>my reaction was that I too, would have hit a wall…it almost seems that you guys were trying to lay out all the answers to all the apps now…and I just don’t know that you can truly get this college application process completely plotted out in advance…and I suspect your daughter just could not get her brain around all of it. Who can get their brain around all components of 10 +/- apps…</p>
<p>I understand the financial aid aspect that is an important, if not most important criteria…but, if at all possible (what worked for us) was to let her build a list of her Early App, then her Rolling or State app… and
then her top 3 others. Work really hard on those…1 or 2 at a time… (perhaps you or W can separately build a master sheet of essay questions for each and every school to try to identify themes or similiarities in what they are looking for)… once the Early App and the Rolling/State app are done, then the next 3 get fleshed out…and then the others will be sooo much easier…because she will have reusable stuff… or she will start to see how tweaking essay for app #4 can be done so it can be used in app #8… sometimes what is reusable is not evident until you are out of time…or you have a higher priority… </p>
<p>for us, breaking up the list of schools into the order of attendance preference to then generate her list of order of completion of the apps just breaks this massive huge thing up into manageable bites. </p>
<p>I have been in IT sales for 29 years … once upon a time I was new at it… and I have trained, mentored, encouraged and even discouraged some newbies… but one thing that always worked for me was to make some of my first calls on smaller, less important customers… don’t always start on your best and biggest customer. The applicability of this advice is to encourage you guys to pace yourselves thru this process. You have lots of time left to confirm final deadlines etc… do two important apps from the top of the list…then one from the bottom, then back to the top apps, do 2 more, then another 1 or 2 from the bottom and work your way to the middle, maybe is another approach? </p>
<p>One can definitely over analyze/manage this stuff and that is just kryptonite to HS kids…my son definitely added a school to his list in November and took schools off then too… </p>
<p>One major meltdown should not be enough to totally change the destination of this trip your daughter is on… and I definitely echo Alumother’s comment about why kids should consider/want elite or top schools. To me, it is the same answer for why I wanted my kid to accept the slot for the “gifted and talented” option in elementary school. That program did not specifically address the math skills my child had…but, I knew that the conversations, the questions, the overall dialog in the G&T pgm would be more engaging and more challenging and I wanted that for my 7 yr old. I still personally crave a great conversation, a great dialog, a great book…and so, don’t back down or back off yet…just all 3 of you do a short time out…enjoy what is left of the summer?? (is she back in school already?) </p>
<p>Another thought is from a dear friend who hired an “essay coach” for her daughter this year. The coach came to the house…spent the day with the applicant…the coach asked a lot of questions and helped the gal zero in on her strengths to focus on. The coach does NO writing, but just helps the child focus on what to feature for essay purposes. Not sure a parent can do this type of “coaching” and don’t know that it needs to be “hired” but, perhaps a parent of an older friend of your daughter’s? someone who has gone thru this before? someone who knows what colleges look for in essays? Your daughter may be afraid of the essays cause she may not like to toot her own horn…or whatever… I tried to remind my son that the essay was the thousand word picture in reverse. It is their chance to make sure THEIR voice is heard… what do they really want to make sure the schools know about THEM so the reader can see them on their campus. There is NO wrong essay if it is the applicant’s voice… make sure she knows this… there is no wrong essay. </p>
<p>anyway, it is late…got to shut down for the final pack and depart in the am…a little thought gem for the nite is I think I visit CC because my own college experience was sooo great. I get to relive it vicariously thru my own child, thru your child and all the others who have posted over time and established their own voices here on CC. These are formative years and what I think we all wish for our kids is that they have some great choices come next April. I wanted 3 choices for my son, he had 5 great ones. One of the 5 was the state college which included nice $$$. He loved that one… was very proud of it…one of the 5 was $4K cheaper than the other ones… we viewed that delta like it was a scholarship!! </p>
<p>Hang in there…keep the faith…and know that while these next 9 mos will seem to go sooooo slow, you will be back at hyperspeed come May 1st and graduation and departure for college will come in the blink of an eye. Remember those 9 mos when pregnant with these kids? I loved the book that highlighted exactly what was going on month by month during the pregnancy…one almost needs to revisit those months now as you go thru this application process. “Filling out that leadership list is soo much harder than growing fingernails!!” </p>
<p>Enough rambling…goodnite…good luck…</p>
<p>Curmudgeon, your D’s present attitude mirrors my son’s to a tee, though he did do one supplemental essay for Oberlin. He also eliminated from his list any college that required any SAT 2’s. But he also was on a quest for merit money for reasons I had mentioned before.</p>
<p>The results were fantastic for him-no stress, no anxiety, minimal amount of time getting applications finished and sent in(thank you CommonApp), free to choose EC’s based on what interested him rather than divining what some adcom might be looking for, and an enjoyable senior year.</p>
<p>His final list included Rensselaer, Case, Oberlin, Allegheny, Wooster and our state flagship university. He never worried about being accepted, only anxious about the merit scholarships that would be offered.</p>
<p>We supported his decision whole-heartedly and also his decision to attend Rensselaer where he had a wonderful first year academically and socially. </p>
<p>Good luck to your daughter.</p>
<p>D has completed apps from bottom up (in terms of her preferences) and this seems to be de-stressing her. State U submitted online and 3 safe/match schools completed. These were the easier and non-threatening apps. She was able to write her personal statement around her career goals (pretty easy) since she’s applying to specific programs at these colleges. </p>
<p>The LACs are next.</p>
<p>I think the best advice is to work from easy on down. Completing apps is an acquired skill, and most kids do get better at it. You just have to take it one step at a time, because looking at the whole “to-do” picture is too overwhelming.</p>
<p>I just can’t let go ;).</p>
<p>The bottom-up approach worked well for us as a destressor, plus it gets a rolling admission acceptance under her belt. One of the advantages of a prep school, even a non-selective one like DD’s is that everyone is applying to college - even the kids that don’t much want to! They pull all the seniors out of class for a couple of periods in late August, and everyone sits around in the theater filling out apps and writing essays. This was useless for my daughter in getting her essays done, because she (like me) cannot do creative-type writing under those conditions, but she did fill out an app to big state uni, and did the draft of the Common App.</p>
<p>One thing that parents can do to help the child through the early senior year meltdown (this isn’t specifically addressed to you Curmudge) is draw up a schedule for deadlines for their child - my DD very much likes to set her own deadlines, but in the press of the first few weeks of senior year, she asked me to research and make her a chart/spreadsheet of deadlines for each school, SAT requirements, essay requirements, number recs, any scholarships - anything that would go into the application. We did NOT do this legwork together, she gave me the list and I made the chart - then she took the chart, had her little meltdown, and reworked (ala Mudgerella) the list, but it helped her to not have to do that “secretarial” type paperwork.</p>