I think because I have been divorced for so long I am just used to not seeing my kids every holiday. I did stop in and see all 3 of my kids for about 5 minutes at my ex husbands new apartment. My ex moved out and is divorcing the evil “new wife” who insisted he stop talking to family.
I was thrilled I did not spend the holiday with my kids. Instead, it was the first time in over 10 years my kids got a full evening with their dad and his side of the family. Its the first time in 6 years our oldest was “allowed” to spend an actual holiday with his dad (actually my 22 year old hadn’t talked to his dad in almost 2 years). I saw photos of my kids smiling and happy. That is all I needed for Thanksgiving.
My only sibling had a massive stroke 3 months ago. He will never live independently again. He is mostly nonverbal and struggles to communicate. Then my father in law had a heart attack and open heart surgery 2 weeks ago. On Thanksgiving I stopped in at 2 different rehab facilities. My parents needed a distraction from the sadness of seeing their once vibrant 46 year old son now immobile. So we let my mom cook. Last minute we chose to break out my father in law from the rehab place for dinner. And my sister in law, her husband and their college son all piled into my parents small condo with my husband and I to have Thanksgiving together.
I guess I just appreciate more of the small, unplanned moments and seeing my kids happy.