Doublebach-what data do you have that support the “bench player” at Brown story? Remember, I said “softball” and “high academic”. The roster at Yale is 20 girls and if you look, unless they are injured, they all play some. Why would a coach do that when there are plenty of women with “high enough” stats who can also play? Remember, we aren’t talking about football or lacross. The Georgetown coach told me she has 3000 girls e-mailing her every year-I imagine more than 5 of them have excellent test scores, grades AND softball skills.
My DD has been chasing the “high academic” softball dream for 3 years now, and I can tell you that while her high scores have gotten her interest, it’s her skills that have gotten her invitations.
However, the OP can likely find a school interested in his DD if he gets right on it. Just not at the places he mentioned, and not to “play the bench!”
The ‘bench player’ theory, even in lacrosse and football, only works for the player who gets in on his/her own and then wants to be on the roster. The coach isn’t going to help a high stat kid who isn’t a very good player because Brown and Yale and Harvard are full of high stat kids who want to play the sport and can walk on and sit on the bench.
I took the OP’s question as is it too late to be get help from the coach. either money or admissions help. There are schools where the OP could still be recruited if a good player. Unfortunately, not at the schools listed. It also sounds like the OP’s daughter is not all that interested in playing softball in college. That lack of enthusiasm will also come through to the coach.