Also on his list: Emory, Pitt, Temple.
And at the bigger schools, we hope he would be accepted in the honors or scholars programs.
One benefit to the more intellectual LACs is that even though many might be using weed on a weekly basis, because studies are taken seriously, it is constrained to weekend usage. At many less academically inclined schools, partying - weed or alcohol - can easily be a 3, 4, 5+ night a week thing instead of a 1-2x a week thing. @momofgingers, after reading you post #39, I think that is something to factor in, frequency more than percentage who partake.
@momofgingers on our many visits to U Richmond, sometimes walking around late at night on a Saturday, I have never smelled pot outside or in the dorms. I have a D who graduated from UR last year, and another D who is heading into Senior year.
There are plenty of UR Students who do not participate in Greek life (approx 30% do participate), frats and sororities are not residential, but do seem to host large parties during weekends. Most older students live in on campus apartments, and smaller parties are hosted in those. My Ds report that alcohol is the main drug of choice, with some level of pot smoking, and a small amount of other drugs.
They are not involved in Greek life, but some of their friends are. They have occasionally attended a Greek hosted party, often to chaperone other friends who drink too much, but prefer smaller get togethers with friends, having dinner out, going to see a movie, playing games. There have always been plenty of friends around who are not into hard core partying, and there are substance free events on campus most weekends.
They both reported a fair amount of drunken partying in the freshman dorms, and our older D and one of her friends called for emergency services for a floor mate who was passed out and vomiting. The partying dropped off a lot after the first semester, when the students realized they needed to concentrate more on their studies if they wanted to stay at UR.
Their experience seems to be typical of many friends who attend other colleges, from big state Us to other LACs, lots of partying freshman year which tapers off as students get more serious about academics and get more involved in clubs and service activities.
This may not be an option you’d consider, but I know from my experience, and something I’ve seen and heard from others, all the frequency of partying drops off after the first year or two. Most of my friends at college were transfers from community colleges, as was I. Partying was only on the weekends, and often only one night on the weekends. A young man I know now who has finished up community college and is starting at a four year says it’s a big difference to him. His maturity earlier on still had him in a bit of a party scene, and now he’s over that and more focused on his studies. Of course there are risks to staying home, around old friends, but potential benefits too.
I think you’ve mentioned that you already know about some of the California schools to avoid. Mostly some of the NorCal schools have the reputation. For sure Humboldt and Santa Cruz.
@MYOS1634 Not App State lol. A few years ago one of my friends transferred from there to UNC and he would tell me stories about how they all smoked every day at App.
Btw, not a lot of people smoke weed at UNC. It’s definitely there, but the drinking culture is way more prevalent. You definitely don’t feel excluded if you don’t smoke
A conservative religious school would probably be your best bet. I know he said he doesn’t want them, but it is still probably the best bet.
If HE is serious about actively avoiding it, then sub free housing is a good choice. Be warned though that at least some are almost certainly in there because their parents want them to be and have no real intention of remaining sub free.
I’ve noticed that more urban schools tend to use less substances in general. I figure it’s because rural schools have less to do on a typical Friday night.
When you get serious about a choice or two, see if he can spend a weekend there. Some programs allow that. Walk around the grounds on a Friday night and see if you can smell weed.
It’s unlikely you’d smell it in dorms. In most states, smoking is not allowed in any public building and dorms are considered public buildings. You shouldn’t be smelling cigarette smoke either.
Even at CU, where pot is legal for those over 21, it is not legal to smoke it in public, in dorms, in classrooms or theaters or restaurants. Do I think students have it in their dorm rooms? Yes. Do I think it is less likely to be in the honors dorms or specialty housing? No. Was it there when I attended 40 years ago? Yes, and probably more of it.
I smell pot when I’m walking our dog around our block. People don’t like to smoke in their homes so smoke outside in their backyards. That’s legal. Smoking in public places isn’t.
The bigger problem is edibles. You don’t smell them and they are easy to have in your pocket.
There is some overlap between your son’s list and the schools to which my daughter applied last year. One name I didn’t see was St Olaf. I know you aren’t looking for religious/military schools, but St. Olaf is affiliated with the more politically and socially liberal Lutherans and the religious dimension is not heavy handed. I know of atheists who have enrolled there and had great experiences and my non-religious, non-partying daughter applied. I really liked the school and it offers generous merit-based scholarships.
I’d suggest looking at Va Tech, if it has your son’s major.
https://www.samhsa.gov/data/sites/default/files/NSDUHresultsPDFWHTML2013/Web/NSDUHresults2013.pdf has some information on use of illegal drugs and alcohol.
Figure 2.9 on page 23 suggests that 19.1% of 18-25 year olds used marijuana in the past month in 2013.
Figure 2.12 on page 27 suggests that Asian people use illegal drugs (combined, but most such use is marijuana) at much lower rates than black, white, and Hispanic/Latino people. But that is not stratified by age or college attendance.
The bottom of page 27 mentions full time college students, whose illegal drug use rates do not appear to be much different from general trends for their age cohort.
Figure 3.2 on page 38 suggests that 44.4% of 18-25 year old men were binge drinkers of alcohol in 2013 (versus 31.4% for 18-25 year old women).
Figure 3.3 on page 39 suggests that all non-white people had lower overall alcohol use rates than white people, though binge rates were mostly similar except that they were lower for Asian and multiracial people. Heavy drinking rates were highest among Pacific islander, multiracial, and white people and lowest for Asian people. But that is not stratified by age or college attendance.
Figure 3.4 on page 40 suggests that binge drinking is higher among full time college students than others within the 18-22 year old age group.
From having family members with substances issues, I know a lot of what triggers someone backsliding from substance sobriety is being around people with whom you’ve done it (those old friends and old places - your brain makes the connections with them and your vice of choice and makes it very difficult to resist). I know your son SAYS he won’t want to do substance free, but he should seriously consider it. Kids tend to make friends with people they live with, whether it’s a roommate, people on your floor or in your building. If you hook up with like-minded people, the ability to resist temptations will be easier. And not all of the kids in these substance-free dorms are being sequestered there by paranoid parents. Some just aren’t that much into the party scene, don’t want to hassle with the drunk/high people who come in late, loud, throw up, pass out, and/or require emergency services.
As everyone says, he will find weed ANYWHERE he goes if he wants it badly enough. To lessen the contact - and surround himself with people uninterested in it as well - try a substance-free dorm.
Ceilingroofgoat, you mean UNC-Asheville?
Mamag2855, I am glad to hear that about Richmond. My husband wants to leave that school on the list. It’s one of the few we have toured so far. How preppy is it? Are the students wealthy? (I mean, relatively wealthier than students at public schools?) How about the political atmosphere: left, right, or equal mix?
Romanigypsyeyes, my son would be miserable at a conservative religious school, having been raised in the most liberal town in our (liberal) state. I like your idea of spending a weekend at a few schools, prior to picking one. That’s a great idea.
I would not put him in a substance free dorm unless he wanted to be there. I’m not in charge of him. He is. I’m interested in giving him tools that help him navigate. If he thinks that will help, he will do it. But I do think he needs help picking a school.
Mamaedefamilia, I will look up St. Olaf’s. NYMommabear, I have been to VA Tech and thought it was a lovely campus. I will check that out too.
Not that this is an option for OP, bit I have a feeling the all-women’ colleges would have a lower than average rate of pot smoking. I’d be interested to hear from any who have experience in this area.
Perhaps look at.schools that offer wellness dorms.
The document linked in #50 indicates lower marijuana use among women than men, but the difference does not appear to be as large as for alcohol.
@momofgingers Decades ago, UR had a reputation for being a conservative school targeting rich, preppy students. Happily, UR has evolved into a much more diverse institution. Yes, it does have its share of rich, preppy kids, but many more who are not, including my own, who attended public schools, who could not attend UR without their scholarships, do not have cars or designer clothes, expensive vacations abroad, etc. They have had part time jobs on campus to earn their own spending money to fund incidentals and entertainment, eating out, etc.
There are certainly wealthy students at UR, who will be found at most fairly selective LACs. My Ds were able to find plenty of good friends at UR with common backgrounds and interests (some of them wealthy, but very down to earth).
There is a broad spectrum of groups and clubs, for students who lean liberal, conservative, and everything in between. UR has also been recognized for being very supportive of LGBQT students.
There are also many opportunities for community service in the Richmond area. UR has a satellite center for civic engagement in the city, called “UR Downtown” and has daily shuttles for UR students. Richmond is a very diverse, metropolitan city, with transplants from all over, it is no longer a southern tobacco town.
UR’s Board of Directors has recently stepped up efforts to make UR even more accessible for low income students. Last year, they hired a well regarded new President, Ronald Crutcher, who is African American, and he is doing a good job bolstering those efforts.
The partying culture will be hard to avoid altogether at any college. In the end, it is up your son to make the choices which will keep him on a positive path. Simply being aware of his prior issues and turning things around in HS may help him avoid the crash and burn some students experience as freshmen. He really sounds like a great kid:)