Yes. I lived below my means and saved too much for their college. I did not want to mortgage my house, like my parents did to send my brother to private school. I do have 529s both prepaid and regular savings, Coverdel savings, Utma, and Roths. Never did I plan on them getting merit scholarships, like they are. I met with an accountant and started saving when they were one year olds. I have been pulling the 529s while my oldest has scholarships to avoid penalties and putting into an Utma for grad school or future because what it they do not attend graduate school. You will be stuck with penalties upon withdrawl then. I am not sure that an 18 year old can appreciate how hard it is to save this much.
3 Likes
There are some marginal benefits for going to one of the āprestigeā colleges like Georgetown. These are found typically in the fields of finance and law. But for law its not the undergrad that matters but the law school they graduate from.
If you think that your daughter might move out of accounting into something else (esp high finance) then a Georgetown degree will look better than a UMD degree. But if she is 100% sure that sheāll stay in accounting then there is no need to spend the extra money for a fancy Georgetown degree.
Georgetown connections also help for positions in government. But in the end its up to her to decide whether the extra perceived prestige is worth it.
3 Likes
You are me.
I also have an MBA and had an internship. And I saved forever. And my two kids will cost me $140-150k and I planned for multiples of that.
You donāt let an 18 year old dictate an exiemse larger than anything but a home. Weāll you can but in my opinion you shouldnāt.
Either sheās too young to understand or feels entitled etc.
Many kids go to their dream school btw and transfer out. Many go to āsafetiesā and meet their bff. There are so many colleges out there any of these kids with dream schools can succeed at.
And letās be honest - UMD is a highly reputable school. No slouch at all.
And $300k+ can buy a lot of Uber or train tickets to Gtown
I donāt have non 529 so I donāt know the rules but Iām sure they each have stipulations for scholarship winners like the 529 does. You should be able to google and find info.
Did you read the link I sent you ? You can pull the 529 $$ out up to the scholarship amount. So that alone doesnāt hurt other than taxes on earnings (no penalty).
Good luck.
3 Likes
We are in the same situation with #1 son, who got a merit scholarship and does not need to touch his 529. But you can use 529 for grad schools, so why transfer them? Also you can leave them for grandkids if you are thinking long term.
Kudos to you as well! We live way below our means as well and have enough if #1 son wants to attend med school. The closer he gets though, it appears itās going to be MD/PhDā¦ so lucky us if he gets the full-ride!!! We wonāt know how to spend it, lol.
1 Like
If you have all the money saved and it is hers either way, then it is up to her. If she really wants to go to Georgetown and did the work to get there, why would you say no?
4 Likes
It is her decision. However, she values my opinion heavily and I do not want to steer her the wrong way. I have given her no opinion yet.
I see myself in your place in two years with my younger one. I will let him decide. I was in this situation as a teen myself and my parents did not let me decide and I was not happy about it. It worked out of course in the end as most things of this nature do. But if the money existed and was put aside for this, why not use it?
2 Likes
It is helpful to hear that you were not happy about it. I saved an equal number of dollars for each child. I guess if one wants to spend it on undergrad and get partial loans for grad school and the other takes the free ride and has no debt, then at least they have made their own choices. I would just have to be careful not to supplement the younger one that ran out of funds in the future, or the older one would be bitter.
This is harder: On the other hand, you are saying āitās your callā to an 18yo, who has the keys to a sports car in one hand and a mini-van in the other- at the very moment when the āprizeā for winning at HS (getting into a good college) is being handed out to all her friends, and what sweatshirt you wear on college sweatshirt day is the public mark of your success- or lack thereof.
On the other hand, if you have said āitās your callā all the way along, I donāt think you can take that back. You can address the points above- no, you wonāt get a better starting salary as an accountant from one than from the other; no, you donāt have a meaningfully better chance of getting into Gātown Law if you do UG there; yes, your 529 $$ are good for law school (look at law school costs!); yes, if you donāt use the 529 $$ for UG and you donāt go to law school you can use that money (less the penalty obvs) as a down payment on a house; yes your friends are going to āprizeā name colleges- but yours wants you so much that they are effectively giving you a college education, etc. But changing the rules of the game at this stage, and saying a hard ānoā is seriously problematic, especially as she wouldnāt be making a bad choice- just a less prudent one.
5 Likes
Youāre a nice dad.
I was full pay everyone. But I had ādadā right.
My daughter wanted AU. It ended up after $-5k merit beyond my desired price.
The difference. We had this discussion up front.
At $320k vs $0 (donāt forget inflation and that college anywhere costs more than they say)ā¦at that price you have the right, in my opinion, to jump in. Depends on your value set of course.
Over time that money will grow. Find a home, wedding, car, grad school etc.
I would have zero struggle with this. But. We are all different.
Good luck.
4 Likes
But you were upfront about it from the beginning. You told the kids money matters and you werent going to pay (I am guessing from your posts). If OP told the kid I have this much money and you can spend it all and she got into the ādreamā school and wants to go, hard to tell her no now.
3 Likes
She WOULD be making a bad choice. ideally you can help her see this but if she doesnāt you have to make the call (IMHO). we are not talking about $30k vs $40k. We are talking about $77k vs none. X 4. I donāt know about you but it takes me a long time to save $77k. And guess what - the outcome career wise is likely identical.
Itās the parents $$. Not the childās.
Yes the conversations about budget should always take place first but sometimes you have to make the hard call.
She obviously crushed HS. The reward is a financial boon.
Again itās up to Op But this is such a no brainer.
@skieurope gave the first response to the question. He was brief, accurate and spot on.
No
Honestly I was surprised the question was even asked. I get the emotions of it and this is why parents need to have this discussion up front.
Bit if you are honestly answering the question about the worthā¦thereās really no debate.
The reality is we fixate on a specific college yet there are many around the country that each of these kids can have a wonderful experience. And we also see many at their dream school looking to leave. There is no happy guarantee. There is a financial security guaranteeā¦.in this case.
6 Likes
While I do think kids should have the right the choose the college and major, when it comes to paying for it, parents have to have a say, and maybe even the right to veto in some cases. If the choice were between GU and a community college, Iād say go to GU. But UMD is a great school. The difference between the two is marginal on paper & practically non-existent in real life. In this case, Iād veto the decision to go to GU for a price difference of $300K. Thatās not an insignificant amount for anyone.
5 Likes
I get it. Heāll anger her but sheāll get over it and when she starts paying rent and grows up comfortably into her real life, sheāll realize. Best thing I ever did go to UMD.
After college and a menial job in my major in Connecticut, I moved home to CA.
Got a sales job. Instantly making six figures at 23. Was embarrassed to live home. A colleague said - donāt be embarrassed. When you are 40 youāll realize itās the smartest thing you ever did.
She was right.
4 Likes
She would need STRONG grades from Georgetown to get accepted to GT Lawā¦not just an undergrad degree from the school. And a very strong LSAT.
7 Likes
I do not want to discount the OPās productive struggle, but I appreciate that the major is āaccountingā in this ROI/life experience question on some very real sociological level ā only parents of 18 year olds in that moment can fully appreciate the abstract opportunities of the situation and only parents and young adults a few years out can see the clear answer.
Accounting has such a logical decision making processā¦having been in the productive struggle of decision making of ROI/life experience and all the feels - it is so hard in the moment. One kid could not see the realities until being in it and transferred to an instate school that he would not even consider applying too the year before and has been so pleased. The other had similar options faced by the OPās kid and made the decision almost instantaneously before she even had the full ride offer and just the initial round of merit and dept scholarships.
Embrace the bewilderment of parenting and have real conversations about financial realities.
2 Likes
Okā¦Iāll be the contrary one here. We were fortunate like the OP that we could fund collegeā¦really any collegeā¦for our kids.
We did work with them to identify choices where to apply. After that, it was their choice. Our input came before the applications were sent.
Both kids did not choose the least net costs option. And in both cases, they chose schools that served them well. And yes, we could have saved a ton of money if our kids had chosen the least costly acceptance option.
Soā¦I will sayā¦this family allowed this kid to apply to UMD AND Georgetown. They have the resources to pay.
Certainly, they can have a conversation with this kid about the costs, future costs, etc. I would hope that this happened with their first kid also.
Soā¦I sayā¦let the kid chooseā¦ cause you OKād the applications.
Having said thatā¦I do agree with @skieurope that Georgetown cost canāt be justified solely by a desire to have an accounting degreeā¦which will be just fine from UMD.
7 Likes
If thatās how you treat it then itās more likely to cause angst. OP has said that they want to treat their kids equally in terms of funding, and let them have any left over money for grad school, house deposit etc.
We did the same with our twins: one took a full ride, the other a more costly, higher ranking school (though not $80K per year). Both have had an amazing experience and neither would change places with the other. But they have understood how much the full ride and the resulting ~$100K in leftover funds will mean going forward in terms of opportunities for grad school, house deposit, etc. (they had started Roth IRAs in high school and had a decent sense of how long it takes to accumulate savings, though even then they didnāt truly get it until they saw the bills and the ~$25K credit per semester from the scholarship).
So my advice would be to show your kid very clearly what having an extra ~$300K would mean in life. How long will it take them to pay back loans for grad school or save for a house deposit? Most 18 year olds have no idea. Only at that point would I trust them to make the right decision for themselves. And frankly a kid studying accounting ought to be better placed than most to understand it.
5 Likes
Best of luck to her! She truly sounds amazing. UMD does have a history of making strange decisions with admissions and merit. They have been extremely unpredictable in my 8 years of experience with them. My oldest was in the top 10 in his class, NMSF, 15 APās (all 5ās), etc. We are in state. He got in and was admitted to the Honors College. He did receive the Presidential Scholarship. The valedictorian of his class also was admitted, but didnāt get an Honors invite (she was offered College Park Scholars). The only student in my sonās class who got the BK invite was number 20-something in the class.
Four years later, my daughter with nearly identical stats applied. She was admitted to Smith for business, but did not receive an Honors invite (Scholars for her).
My youngest was just admitted to UMD (Smith) yesterday and received an Honors College invite. He has slightly higher stats than his siblings, and will probably graduate #4 or 5 in his class. Of course, itās too early to know if he will receive a BK invite (doubtful) or any other merit award. My kids attend(ed) a very competitive high school that sends approximately 30 - 40 students to UMD every year. Typically, about 100 apply, 75(ish) are admitted, and 30-40 attend. I donāt know how many applied this year, but we were all in disbelief as the decisions rolled in last night. The child who is likely to be valedictorian (sibling is currently at UMD with BK) was admitted, but did not get an Honors invite. Another of my sonās friends who is in the top 10 in his class was offered Freshman Connection and another friend (probably top 20 - maybe higher) was rejected. These are kids with 1500+ on the SAT, so not at all expected outcomes for in state. My point is really just to not count on anything coming out of UMD admissions to necessarily make sense. Your daughter totally sounds like a shoe-in for the BK, but itās so unpredictable.
1 Like
In this case I donāt think a 100% scholarship was envisioned. No one can count on that right?
Also a law school like Gtown today isnāt going to necessarily have an advantage coming from Gtown. Itās going to take a 170 LSAT and work experience. I could not find a student profile but itās noted in several articlesā¦from teacher to other professions. And POC is a big focus there too.
I doubt one going to GTown, Maryland or any other schoolā¦reputed or notā¦would matter as much as grades, LSAT, work experience and other non controllables.
1 Like