Did you look at the University of Oklahoma if you are a NMF? You can get a good education at many schools if you make the effort? It sounds like you have what it takes even if your plans change. I like MIT but no place is worth putting a family in a stressful financial situation. Go there for grad school after doing well and having fun at another college. CS talent can get jobs without a degree. If you can produce good results in that field, the startup companies are more open minded and don’t always require a degree. Many programmers can teach themselves better than some institutions can. There are many ways to go, so have faith in your gut.