@VinceLestrade look on your other threads. I put a link to the homeschool/ college section of this forum.
@jym626 — I’m comfortable in almost any unfamiliar situation that doesn’t involve residential life. It is an anxiety thing that I’m sure I’ll get over to some extent. I do socialize with other people, and I have attended homeschool events, so my only issue is the cohabitation element.
@thumper1 — I checked out the sub and engaged with it a bit. Thanks for the link.
@VinceLestrade - Respectfully, your many threads describe several aspects of anxiety disorders/phobias (fear for your safety/need for weapons, fear of theft/need for lockers for your personal belongings, fear of undressing in front of others, etc. ) Some of these are certainly reasonable, but some seem a bit problematic. Am curious if you might have had a school pghobia that led to being homeschooled. I have a relative who took this route.
There are lots of other anxiety disorders and social phobias-- even fear of writing or eating in public, etc. But they are very, very treatable and manageable.
The best way to deal with anxiety issues is not to avoid, but to learn coping skills, relaxation training and desensitization…You can learn to manafge and tolerate the things that make you uncomfortable, rather than to avoid, which typically makes matters worse. Have you pursued therapy for these issues? The time to do this is now, so you have the tools and skills to cope with college life and living around and with others.
The best option for an 18 year old attending a city based school would be the situational awareness necessary to keep from being victimized.
A close second would be a good pair of running shoes.
At 18 years old your other options for “defense” require you to get closer to the threat than you want to be.
@jym626 — I am quite anxious about college in general, which I believe is manifesting itself into these various concerns. My main issue is uncertainty, as I don’t know what college life is like, and I am scared that the unknown will bring unforeseen challenges.
A lot of it is a fear of change, as I have been luck enough to have had a pretty consistent upbringing. I want independence, but what many colleges offer is outside my comfort zone.
I’ve never been diagnosed with a mental condition, and I don’t think my anxiety is maladaptive enough to qualify as a mental condition (I’m not depressed or agoraphobic, for instance). I just think I’m a fish out of water, with some apprehensions derived from my fear of the unknown.
@GKUnion — Certainly! I have done Cross Country for five years and Track for ten, so I’m a good runner, I believe. I’m not the most street smart, but I do have some experience with situational awareness from working in a public city building, encountering many interesting figures along the way.
I’ve known many homeschooled students who attended college. What you describe isn’t a result of homeschooling. Taking a gap year and/or speaking with a counselor may help.
@austinmshauri — All I’m talking about is not wanting to be next-to-naked around strangers, wanting to feel like my belongings are secure, and being prepared to deal with what may occur while walking in high-crime neighborhoods. I fail to see which of those concerns are indicative of a mental condition on my part. Sure, I am nervous, but taking basic precautions that would be considered par for the course in any other context is not crazy. Normal people do not walk around strangers in bath towels, normal people secure their belongings, etc.
If I was to be depressed or frenzied over these concerns, then there would be an issue, but simply predicting that certain levels of vulnerability may prove uncomfortable for me is not severely maladaptive. I actually see it as better to prepare beforehand.
@vincelestrade I think a lot of posters are pointing out that your level of concern about being in a new environment seems to exceed what other students your age typically express.
Yes, change is scary and anxiety-provoking. However, you are expressing what you identify as 'paranoid" thoughts, and the security measures you want to put into place (locking up clothes, carrying weapons) again feel excessive in light of what the actual risk will likely be on most college campuses.
If your paranoia/anxiety rises in new situations, how will you handle actually being in college and navigating dorm relationships? How will you deal with conflict and compromise with your roommates? I think the concern is that your go-to response of paranoia/protection-mode could make the situation worse if other students don’t understand where you’re coming from. People who consistently interpret the motives of others as persecutory and suspicious (without cause) are difficult to be around. This is why a lot of people are encouraging you to find ways of coping with your anxiety that don’t involve endlessly fixating on your worst case scenarios or trying to proactively control the uncontrollable. It may not be maladaptive now, but you don’t want it to get to that point, either.
Of course, you know yourself better than any of us do! This may just be your way of getting the nerves out, and when you’re at school, all will be well. And I can see that as a doctor, you would likely have deep empathy for the vulnerabilities that your patients might feel and your sensitivity will be a wonderful asset in that situation. Good luck to you in this period of transition.
Respectfully, Vince, most college freshmen don’t plan to lock their clothes in a trunk that they padlock to their bed and they aren’t carrying brass knuckles around campus either. Typical homeschooled students don’t consider those “basic precautions.” Can you visit any of the schools that accept you? An overnight visit would give you a feel for the campus.
@Qtinfo — I do understand where y’all are coming from! I like how you, specifically, worded things; I appreciate it. I have a very obsessive personality, which is a common trait in my family, and this behavior is, in many ways, derivative.
Excessive research — this demonstrated fixation — is a very regular manifestation of my anxieties. Thus far, in my life, it has not significantly affected how I engage with others, and I never take it out on others by rendering unfairly punitive or harsh judgments or being otherwise rude or uncooperative. If it ever became so severe to the point where relationships were affected or depression was caused, I would seek therapy and address it fittingly.
I believe my behavior is not nearly as severe as my planning and research may indicate; I think I come off to people as normal in my day-to-day interactions. For example, I care deeply about security, however I don’t treat people in a distrustful manner.
I do worry about how well I’ll get along in college. I totally recognize that aspect of what you’re saying. I think my fears of this, too, will prove exaggerated, though. I’m a fairly social, if somewhat self-conscious, person, and I get along well with others. Once I’ve gotten a dorm arrangement and seen how things stack up, I think I’ll be much better off, even if my dorm scenario is not ideal. I’m afraid of change, but I have, thus far in life, been able to adapt to it.
@austinmshauri — Yeah; I understand! I don’t aim to keep all my clothes in a state of locked containment, just maybe a coat or two and my spare shoes. Also, the “locker” would just be a suitcase-type thing with a TSA lock on it. Still, though, it’s unusual; and, I assure you, if any of my precautions prove offensive or unproductive, I will certainly be willing adapt.
Also, the brass knuckles thing was unrealistic. Presently, I’d be more willing to consider something as simple as a powerful flashlight and/or a whistle. I was giving a large array of suggestions as to narrow things down throughout this thread.
You know, Vince, sometimes we make the unknown scarier than it really is. Maybe you should spend some time researching some positive things about the schools on your list. What courses do they offer that you’d love to take? What groups could you join? Going to an accepted students’ weekend will answer many of your current questions/concerns. Spend some time planning for the fun part too. 
@austinmshauri — I agree with you 100%. Sometimes I can get overly focused on the negative, especially with college decisions looming. I will work a bit on researching some clubs or courses I can get excited about. I appreciate it.
Vince, You may come across as normal in real life. However after reading your musings here, I’d feel very uncomfortable with you dating my daughter. Just sayin’.
Seriously… lighten up. College is all about going outside your comfort zone. If you aren’t prepared to embrace that part of the experience you are probably better off at a commuter school.
And anything can be a weapon when you need one. While attending a city college, I had a stranger grab my arm and start talking very loudly and forcefully in an accent or language I couldn’t make out. It was rush hour, tons of people around, and I wasn’t expecting this. I whacked him with my racquetball racket (I was on my way back from the gym), ran to my dorm where I reported the incident.
@Groundwork2022 — Yeah, I’m always trying to lighten up, the operative word being “trying.” The attempts are often unsuccessful, though I assure you I do devote time to researching more positive aspects of prospective college life, and ones of more likelihood and relevance.
I wouldn’t mention these concerns with someone in real life; I am quite aware that my concerns are overblown.
I’m thinking, in terms of weaponry, I’ll content myself with flashlights and whistles. Anything else would be weird, judging from the reaction I’ve gotten thus far. I need to try to remember that college different from the real world.
My kid went to a very large urban university. One of the orientation sessions…and it was a long session…was on campus and city safety. The campus police and residence life staff presented. They gave excellent things for the students to understand and know about urban life. There were many students who came from other than big city urban backgrounds.
The school knew this…and provided a good amount of info.
@thumper1 — That’s a good school resource. I’ve always been a sort of suburban kid, so I’ve been frequently in and out of the city, but I haven’t always lived in the heat of things. I love the city for its events and opportunities, but I have had scary experiences: namely, drug addicts threatening me, violent panhandlers, and others of that sort.
I think everyone is being a bit harsh. What is the problem with being cautious and safety minded? Also, some people are not comfortable being in a state of near nakedness around others, or seeing others that way. Perhaps it comes from upbringing and personality? I was always taught to be very aware of safety, especially in certain areas. My parents often kept the vehicle locked even in the carport, and never left it unlocked in a public place. My ex-husband was pretty much the opposite of me and my family, to the point that he has left the kids alone in the vehicle in places like Birmingham while he went inside for a job interview 
Unfortunately, colleges are pretty strict about weapons and such, not to mention the fact that some things would not be legal for an 18 year old to possess. You might have to settle for paying close attention to your surroundings and what is going on, as well as trying not to put yourself into unsafe situations.