@gouf78 if you follow the thread, I was agreeing with you that an hour drive with a baby is definitely do-able 
@VaBluebird sorry if I sounded snarky. Obviously the new parents have to be on board. I know I was probably a PITA with my first kid about what I would or wouldn’t do.
For Thanksgiving, we’ll definitely have S2, and most likely S1, DIL and GD. We haven’t been together for Thanksgiving since 2014. I’m very excited, but it’ll be my first Thanksgiving in our new apartment with a much smaller kitchen, and needing to accommodate my vegetarian DIL. I’m still looking forward to it.
@VaBluebird – we are in the exact same situation. D’s baby due on Nov. 29. Our solution is that this weekend we are holding Thanksbabygivingshower, combining a family baby shower with an early Thanksgiving. We have had a recent tradition of having TG at our shore house, which is two and a half hours away. D will not be able to travel that far then, so we moved TG up. Added extended family, so it will be a huge (for me) event, which I am planning from afar, since I can’t get down there till Friday night. I’m a little stressed about it. Lots of moving parts (people staying over, my mom having some health problems that are new and on oxygen), but everyone is chipping in so hopefully it will all work.
As far as Christmas, also think it might get postponed. Someone said that small babies are easy to move, but four weeks old is very young to have a baby out in a crowd, so we’ll see. The kids think it would be fine (not that they know what it will be like yet), but my former pediatrician H is skeptical.
Well, it will all work out. Yay for holiday babies!
I have hosted Thanksgiving for years. We’re having an additional 7 so I’ll have 32 this year. 25 of us sleep over and Wednesday night is an appetizer and pizza dinner with pool and corn hole and a few cocktails.
My sister will have one son in Afghanistan and another across country who won’t be home this Christmas. Well have them with us. I’m already working with my brother in law and we’re getting her a much desired puppy for her.
My 2 kids are unattached and still all mine.
@somemom you might want to call your county’s office relating to seniors/aging. I believe some states have programs that help caregivers take a short vacation by helping to arrange for the Senior to stay in a nursing home for a long weekend (for example) and may even help subsidize that. They might have other programs as well. You might want to post a question about that on the parents taking care of their parent thread; maybe someone there has experience with this and give you more information. Kudos to you for taking responsibility for your parent.
Oh, my gosh, a very nice older man at church may pay DS’s airfare so he can come home at Christmas! I could cry. Trying not to get my hopes up too much yet, though…
For us, we don’t know what the holidays are going to look like. No one in my family is able to host, either due to serious illness, distance, or tiny houses. I’m looking into rental space but no one seems to think that’s very festive.
One daughter lives in Denmark (which doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving Day) and the other daughter lives in California. It doesn’t make sense for CA daughter to fly home for Thanksgiving due to limited vacation time and the hassle of flying over the holidays. After not having Denmark daughter home to celebrate Thanksgiving with us for four years, I finally came up with the brilliant idea that, since Thanksgiving is all about the food, and not the date, we can have Thanksgiving during the Christmas break.
So we will celebrate Thanksgiving on December 23rd, complete with Thanksgiving decorations. Then we will put away those decorations and put up the tree. Because don’t we usually start decorating for Christmas right after Thanksgiving? LOL
We are all excited about being together for our Thanksgiving feast for the first time in five years!
For Christmas it looks like midwestern DS2 and DIL are planning to come here to see us in New England. Since she’s an only child her parents will probably fly in from the west coast. DS1 is a bus ride away and will make time to come up. His SO may be out of state with her nuclear family, though I hope her schedule might allow her a little overlap with the visitors here. My mother is local and healthy. DH will come up from the DC area and combine holiday travel with his telework week(s). It should be really nice.
Thanksgiving is still up in the air. We’ll host if DS1 and SO decide not to, but we’ll bring my mother down if they do.
Both sons went to west coast schools and spent Thanksgiving on campus. We would have loved having them home but were concerned about weather glitches, six-hour flights, and changing three time zones twice in the space of a few days – all right before the home stretch leading up to finals.
DS2 hasn’t had Thanksgiving with us since 2010, so we always added Thanksgiving to our Christmas / winter visits. Last year when he and DIL married here in our town during the holidays, I pulled together and hosted major meals for Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas day, and a wedding, for eight people, in the space of five days. It was hectic but so much fun! Hope to have a houseful again soon.
I’ll host Thanksgiving and Christmas like I have for the last 20-25 years. S1 is bringing his GF for Christmas, which should be interesting. I think they’re planning to be here for a week. We haven’t met her yet, so are excited! D will be here for 2-3 days at Christmas, and S2 is home for several weeks. Only S2 will be here for Thanksgiving, but aunts, uncles, and cousins will be here so it will be festive.
We will have a wild Thanksgiving. Usually, D1 comes to our lake property for Thanksgiving with her DH and children. However, they are moving to the DC area early next month. So, D2 and D3 thought it would be a great idea to descend on her for Thanksgiving!! My husband was on board, so I called and asked if we could all celebrate at their new home. She was thrilled!!! Her husband was even more excited and touched that we would all want to get together. (His mother passed away early last December, right after they had spent her last Thanksgiving with her.) We all promise it will be low keyed. I already bought the paper plates for Thanksgiving dinner!!
Christmas will be lots of fun. We usually alternate between D2’s house in PA and D1’s house in Fl. This year, we are off to London to celebrate Christmas with D3 who lives there. I love London at Christmas. We lived in London for 3 years, and Christmas there was always special.
So, we will have an exciting and fun holiday season. I can’t wait!!!
the tradition for Thanksgiving seems to have become for our daughter and her husband to host his immediate family (mom, a neighbor of hers, her parents, dad and stepmom) and us (me and H) for dinner which is really nice. They do the turkey (or prime rib last year) and drinks and the rest of us bringing the sides and desserts (pumpkin cheesecake and mashed potatoes are my designated dishes). SIL is great with a smoker (& generally a wonderful cook) so the meat has been smoked the last 3 years and yummy.
Christmas i have no idea. Very difficult to get D & SIL to commit to plans in advance. I’m completely fine doing it a different day but do like to know so we can make plans. We have gone to Vegas a couple of times which has been fun. son lived a long way away and usually works Christmas - last year we went to SC and spent Christmas with him and his girlfriend (now fiancee and soon to be wife) then visited some old friends in FL. This year I can’t really take time off work as son is getting married in Jan and we’ll be going to SC for the wedding then spending a few days with my brother and his wife who will be over from England for the wedding. I also don’t think I will be completely mobile by then from a foot injury.
It’s ironic really. I always loved Christmas but Thanksgiving was never as important to me (because I’m from England). Now it seems we always have nice Thanksgiving plans but Christmas is always up in the air. I’ve actually grown to dread it.
Thanksgiving isn’t a big deal at our house. I always cook. We don’t live near either of our families and never travel for holidays. Five of our seven kids will be home. This Christmas will be the first time in 31 years that our immediate family won’t be together. S#1 and his wife are expecting their first baby right after Christmas, so they won’t be traveling to our place (2 flights away). D#1, who lives in Italy, is getting married in a small/casual civil ceremony in our city–also the week after Christmas (church wedding next summer). Groom’s parents will be here for that. Too much excitement for one week!
Well, thanks to a recent phone call from DD, I am going to have a FANTABULOUS holiday!
Recently married DD and her husband are doing the rotating-holiday thing: Christmas with my extended family (at my sister’s in Atlanta) and Thanksgiving with my SIL’s family in Minnesota. Originally her in-laws were hosting Thanksgiving dinner, but suddenly my DD is hosting the extended in-law family at her house. I got the phone call: “Mom! Everyone is coming here for Thanksgiving! Do you think you and dad could come help us with the turkey and the pies and the cranberries?!”
Of COURSE we can come. Now I get to see her for BOTH holidays. Can’t wait!!
Apologies, long winded.
I have two adult kids, both married. One, a daughter, has two preschool children and lives six hours north from us. The other, a boy, does not yet have kids and lives just over an hour west from us.
We see the family of the daughter up north way more than the son to the west who lives much closer. D has reached the point where she appreciates us (perhaps because she is grateful for our relationship with and help with the little ones, who are delightful). D and her H think we are wonderful grandparents and encourage get-togethers with us.
D comes to us with her family for several days at least twice a year, and we visit them every couple of months, and on occasion take little trips with them.
For Thanksgiving, we are headed to D’s and then taking older grandson on a two day area trip just with us. This will give D and her H a bit of a break for a few days, and will give grandson some extra two-on-one adult attention.
Re Christmas, D had asked about joining us in our home town, but we had already made plans to spend the holiday at my brother’s home in NYC, two hours from us, because he is currently based in Hong Kong and only gets to this side of the globe twice a year, once at Christmas. Brother’s wife has a medical issue and he told me they want to keep Christmas low key and small, so we are going along with that.
Further, I have an elderly uncle in NYC who is not doing well and we will spend time visiting him after Christmas.
Our S and his wife are likely spending both holidays with her family (who live in our area and are lovely, and would likely include us if we were going to be in town.) This works fine for H and me, as we are trying to give S and his wife plenty of space – want them to take the lead in planning get-togethers.
I am delighted not to be hosting a holiday this year, as I have done it many years and am ready to have a more relaxed holiday – will skip tree, ornaments, etc. and simply decorate with white lights and greens inside, and mixed lights on our evergreen trees outside.
So D is disappointed but understanding not to be see us for Christmas this year, and we suspect S does not care much, if at all. He can see us any weekend they want as they are not far.
My feelings are that I never want to pressure kids to be with us, or force them to make a choice or come to us out of guilt. I also do not care if we see them ON THE day, am fine celebrating on an alternative date. I am glad that this Christmas we will prioritize my brother and elderly uncle.
I told son’s wife’s mom (his MIL) that I am happy that her family and “the kids” get along so well together, and no need for them to feel they must include us whenever they get together with S and his wife. (They all enjoy watching college football together, for example, and H and I have no interest in football.)
Occasionally we have son’s mother-in-law and father-in-law for dinner without the “kids” and vice versa. I also sometimes do outings with son’s MIL.
D’s MIL lives an airplane ride away, but they (and often we) see her several times a year. Perhaps she will fly to them for Christmas. A few years ago she flew to us for Christmas to join us all when D and her family were coming to our place. We have also gone to D’s MIL’s place one Thanksgiving, and once we all took a group trip with her.
Both of our children (28 & 23) are coming “home” for Thanksgiving from out of state. We’ll be putting our house for sale after the New Year and told them this will be the last Thanksgiving in our house, the house they grew up in.
One kid coming home for Thanksgiving. The other kid is spending it at her BF’s house. Both kids will come home for Xmas. H & I are not really into the holidays, but it will be great to see our babies.
Let’s see… thanksgiving, new dill is on call, h is on call (in different states). My sil has to have a heart procedure (she usually hosts) my mil doesn’t want a big gathering at her house. Can’t stand my sil’s parents so doesn’t want to host them. Oh and d who lives 13 hours away and never comes home, just this week broke up with her long term boyfriend.
I have no idea what we are going to do. No one wants to travel to my house. So probably will have a small gathering with just my mil and fil.
Christmas is another blank storm. Going to my sisters the weekend before. The plan was that H was to take the week between Christmas and New Years off and we would go to D’s house as she has no vacation left. Don’t know if that will happen as H has not requested off and I think is waiting until he knows the rest of his staff is doing. As 3/4 of them quit as they were being worked too hard. Of course H has taken almost no vacation.
Oh and my sister who has known that my mom was to stay with her while we visit our kids this year, told my mom to fly home on Christmas Day. I suspect it’s because she wants to go somewhere that week, which is what she does every year but I thought that this one year she could have mom at her house.
Oh happy days…
Sorry you asked?
We will all trek to my folks’ house. It will be the second Thanksgiving not in my childhood home, but in their apartment. We will stay in a nearby hotel, about half a mile away, because they have little room.
Son2 will bring his GF which will be a first for us. She is great and I am excited. They are driving and S2 attracts trouble, so we have been joking he will finally make it sometime Friday morning.Son1 might bring a girl, but we hope not since his sort of GF is not as great.
No big plans after that. I am a student myself and have papers due. S2 and GF will follow us home and stay for a few days, not sure how long.
I’m the chief cook and bottle washer in our family and my mother lives nearby, so the plan is to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with her. I’m not sure what my BIL and nieces have planned as communication isn’t a strong point with them. D is getting married in a few weeks and the current plan is for them to spend both holidays with us, but I’m sure that’s subject to change. I’m just not going to worry about it and whatever happens, happens.