My mother’s family, her father and brother, are quite dysfunctional. My uncle and his second wife were crazy and abusive to the children from his first marriage and as a consequence he has several grandchildren he has never met. I try to get through to him (I am considered like Switzerland) but I’ve reached the conclusion that it is hopeless. My Mom is gone now and it was awful to see her father and brother dishing out the same garbage when she was even on her death bed.
Now, I worry about my cousins. Idiot uncle made a stupid insulting comment on my Facebook page and I tried to laugh it off in response. It didn’t really hurt me, it was only startling in it’s obtuseness. However one of my cousins reached out to me privately to apologize. Dammit, she shouldn’t be apologizing for him!
It’s also bad that my sister and I are seen as “his” side of the family and I think it’s painful for all of them to see us because we remind them of him. I love my cousins but I don’t see them that often and I hope we can purge any nasty residual idiot-uncleness between us.