^^ Agreed. If he is going to see her then make it an extra special time with good food, company and maybe an event - if they are out and about and he happens to see her browsing at something she likes he can spontaneously buy it.
If he is sort of clueless to what she might like, that might be a sign that a physical gift is premature. I think my girls would be head over heels over a totally fun/nice day/date over a physical gift.
The backpack is a nice idea-for someone who’s been in a relationship for longer than 4 months, imo. As others have said, stay away from clothes, jewelry or accessories. Scarves come in heavy knit for cold weather and thin fabric for warmer areas, or indoor wear. So many choices and girls really like them. Since they’re a new couple, I think a date to someplace nice would be fine.
I vote for an experience (dinner, concert or something new and different she may enjoy.). If he’s on a tight budget he could try Goldstar or Groupon for ideas. I’m wondering about all the talk about a scarf…Personally, I don’t see a lot of scarf wearing going on. I’d only suggest it if he knows she wears them.
Here’s an inexpensive bag and because it’s Costco, no hassle refunds. Backpacks are tough to choose for other folks without their input.
http://m.costco.com/Under-Armour-Storm-Hustle-II-Backpack-.product.100309997.html
I can’t imagine giving a girlfriend a backpack. The sweetest thing a boyfriend ever gave me was a paperback book of Lao Tsu with beautiful photos. I don’t have the boyfriend, but I do still have the book.
My daughter hates jewelry, and is picky about perfume and clothing. She does wear scarves (it’s an east coast and European thing, I guess), but even those are personal. I vote for the experience.
My Mudder loves scarves. But if he hadn’t seen her wear one, then maybe not.
Different strokes for different folks. I am a very practical person so I love practical gifts.
I can’t tell you the favorite thing I’ve ever gotten from a SO but I can definitely think of jewelry I’ve gotten that has gone into a jewelry box never to be seen again.
Well, at first I told him not to do the backpack because I would have hated that. DH always, even just dating a few months, bought me pretty, girly things…
So, I thought she might not enjoy that…but many think it’s fine here, so I told him to do that. He said she wears earrings so he’s buying her that for Xmas.
I would opt for a physical gift at this point. My kids were very fussy about the backpacks they use. (where the pockets are, the size etc) so I’d stay away backpacks and from clothing too for the same reason. My D’s got a scarf once from her relatively new BF’s parents and we all thought that was a lovely gift (we got him a sweater). If she likes coffee, tea etc. you can get something along those lines (fancy teas etc.). A nice picture frame is another idea. Maybe her favorite perfume if your S knows it as another choice.
I think the idea is that she is being thought of fondly but it is not the time to get too personal yet.
Stay away from anything with personal preference involved…unless he takes her out for a shopping event and buys that backpack with her there.
True story. I went out with a guy for several months in HS. He bought me a very pretty amythyst necklace for my birthday. Believe it or not…when we stopped dating very shortly thereafter…I tossed it in the trash.
I would vote for the experience thing. It’s tough being stuck with a gift in the event of a breakup.
I love the idea of a backpack and Reccomend Kipling.
I dunno, to me, a backpack is utilitarian and not very personal. Kinda like buying someone you love a vacuum cleaner. I mean…yeah, you need to vacuum, and everyone likes clean floors, but…meh… (Just my opinion and I so don’t mean to rain on anyone’s parade…might be a perfect gift for that particular girl) Maybe like…a really awesome backpack that completely captures her personality and style?
My daughter’s boyfriend got her a custom phone case with a favorite pop culture reference on it…a show they both enjoy a lot and often watch together. Case was extra shock resistant cause he knows she’s a klutz.
She was a beta tester for a particular computer game, and one year he got her a fan pack with a teeshirt a mug and computer stickers. She LOVED this gift. Nerds…what can ya do?
His mom put him up to a piece of jewelry…that she hated. LOL.
I love the idea of tickets to something they could do together. Same boyfriend took her to an escape room (not sexual…lol…it’s a cerebral puzzle challenge…interactive theater and brain teasers) and she absolutely loved it.
Anything homemade is always loved, particularly when it’s personal. Special books with meaning are a good gift…my kiddo’s boyfriend got her the leather bound collector’s edition of Jurassic Park. Not only does she love the book, but she credits it with being the birth of her obsession with genetics and microbio (her life’s passion).
A gift should say…I know you. I notice and I listen. My favorite things about you, are the things that set you apart and make you uniquely yourself.
Four months in? A special book or journal seems like a lovely idea.
Regardless of the gift itself, my daughter’s favorite things from boyfriends have been sincerely written and heartfelt cards/notes. Those are what she has really cherished.
My 24 year old grad student would love be this…http://www.ebags.com/product/jansport/digital-student/248006?productid=10363115&sourceid=ADWPRODBP&couponid=94790994&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=&adcampaignid=281657538&adgroup=&adgroupid=18714191058&addisttype=gpla&gclid=CJKDz6bUlNACFQyUaQodNPAAZg
Plus, Jantzen has a lifetime guarantee on normal wear and tear. If you pack it up and mail it to them, they will either repair it or mail you back a new one. We’ve done this a few times with son’s backpacks when the bottoms wear through. Love this company!
Tickets to a show. A lot of college kids are anti-materialistic/pro recycle/reuse/upcycle (thus the holey sweaters, torn backpacks, shopping at 2nd hand places). These things are on purpose for some people, especially in hipster land. Is she one of them?
I think @shellz meant Jansport…not Jantzen in post 35!
I’m a Jansport backpack person too. Love them. And they do wear well.
Eagle Creek also makes nice backpacks and has lifetime warranty. They’ve replaced several parts of my waist pack and kept it looking great for over a decade.
@thumper1 thank you…yes, Jansport! My thoughts are not quite caffeinated yet, on this lovely time change morning.