<p>No, all the Moms (and Dads) here are not cruel; they are trying to help you do the right thing.</p>
<p>You signed the ED contract, you are bound to it, and you need to attend the LAC. If theres a legit reason not to attend, contact the school. </p>
<p>If not, you need to attend the LAC. You seem to be taking the stance of a victim in this situation, but you’re not. YOU decided to apply ED and are now a part of a binding contract. Applying RD to other schools is taking other spots away from qualified applicants, and even though you’re trying to make excuses, you’re coming across as just being selfish and immoral.</p>
<p>Well cogitoergosum, it appears that the moms are getting to you. Are you having nagging doubts? This is the first step to doing the right thing. If you are lucky you will have a very long and happy life. Along with that long life will be many disappointments. Trust me when I say that going to a great ED LAC, with your reputation intact, is NOT one of life’s tragedies.</p>
<p>Cruel for wanting you to do the honorable, decent, moral thing!</p>
<p>Oh, I like that. </p>
<p>Instead, you would prefer that people want you to behave dishonorably, indecently, immorally?!</p>
<p>The way you are putting it is making me feel guilty.You make it at though I am taking someone’s spot.Right now I am in a big crossroad.I feel that I will lose either way.</p>
<p>…uh, that’s cuz you are? =P</p>
<p>cogitoergosum, you are destined to be a winner and winners always do the right thing. Now go to it.</p>
<p>cogitoergosum: You have yet explain WHY going to this LAC would be such a bad thing. Why is it losing? Sure, you don’t get to go to Harvard, but so what? I don’t know what LAC it is, but if you’re good enough to have a shot at Harvard I assume the LAC is pretty decent too, so you’ll still get a good education and probably have a good time. I’ve asked before, but, once againt: Why do you think that you’re going to be unhappy there?</p>
<p>cogito, just this afternoon I was discussing the pros and cons of ED with my junior daughter. You gave yourself a huge advantage in applying ED and you know it. You went from being one in thousands to one in several hundred applicants when you signed that contract. Don’t you think every other kid is worried about falling through the cracks too? The whole thing is crazy at the top end, there are no matches, and you did the one thing that could really make a statistical difference. </p>
<p>You can’t have your cake and eat it too. I hope. I have a feeling you won’t be alone in this particular problem this year either.</p>
<p>A preliminary review of your application “might” happen without your mid year report, but your acceptance will NOT be finalized without your final transcript showing that you completed your courses AND fulfilled the graduation requirements of your school. How will you get that final transcript sent to a school other than your ED school?</p>
<p>Perhaps this student is homeschooled or unschooled, although I will say that the families I know in this situation have excellent ethics and would not try to be dishonest in any way regarding a signed contract. An ED application is a contract to attend if accepted, with the requirement that all other applications be withdrawn. The fact that this OP thinks these rules shouldn’t apply to him/her because they were depressed or whatever has absolutely NO relevance to the situation. The ED contract is binding. </p>
<p>Best bet is to call the ED school and asked to be released from that ED acceptance NOW.</p>
<p>But the ED school will not release the OP because he/she prefers to attend HYP. Typically, the only basis for releasing an ED acceptance is serious financial hardship. In that situation, the student is typically released from the ED contract in order to attend a local/state school.</p>
<p>OP, one of the banes of adulthood is that decisions have consequences. You decided to apply ED and that decision had consequences. When adults make decisions (and you are a young adult), some doors close as others open. The door to your ED LAC is open and it will lead to other open doors. The doors to other schools like a Harvard are closed for you right now. It doesn’t mean you might not get through one of those closed doors in the future, but it will most likely be by a different path. But, and this is huge, those paths and doors may be forever closed to you if persist with a plan to walk away from your ED commitment. Do you want to risk that? </p>
<p>You say you “feel I will lose either way.” I repeat, the decision to walk away from your ED school will close more doors than it will open and those doors may be closed to you forever. That will be the bigger loss, I think.</p>
<p>^lol, that’s a very soothing way to say it.</p>
<p>“What if i change my mind?I do not want to lock myself into a school which I don’t like for FOUR YEARS.”</p>
<p>THAT VERY STATEMENT is the reason NO ONE should apply ED to a college they are not totally willing to commit to. CHANGING YOUR MIND is NOT a valid reason to try to get out of an ED decision. If you change you mind you can try to transfer, as others have said. GET it? Thought not.</p>
<p>I’m not being cruel to you and I don’t even want to point out your ethical lapse, but I have daughters a year older and younger than you and I know that mistakes happen. I would hate for you to feel the burning remorse of having no college in the fall and being heartbroken because you could have prevented that outcome. No matter how much you may want things to be different, if you continue on this path, you could and likely would be dealing with the repercussions in myriad ways for years to come. Please don’t do that to yourself. withdraw your other applications, tell yourself “I didn’t get into Harvard” which would be true, and join the Facebook group for your LAC.</p>
<p>Your curiosity as to whether you would’ve/could’ve gotten into Harvard isn’t worth risking your relationship to the LAC. </p>
<p>Go to the LAC, ace it, and try to transfer IF you still feel it might be worth a different school.</p>
<p>Most people DON’T get into Harvard, if it’s Harvard. You are torturing yourself here. </p>
<p>Thumper1, I also guessed the possibility of homeschooling because there is a sense that this student is in control of releasing transcripts, and so little concern for any other students (although that could be true of any student in a small or large school as well). The isolation here is a backstory.</p>
<p>Look, my 2 older kids all went to fine LAC’s, had great experiences and educations, and following graduation are doing EXACTLY what they want with their lives. They made wonderful friends. </p>
<p>YOu have 12 pages of parental feedback here from all over the country. You don’t seem to want to consult on this with your own parents, as you wrote to us. If you’re homeschooled (and that’s just a guess here) your parent, teacher and GC are more-or-less the same person. Maybe that’s the person who has mis-advised you and gotten you into this mess.</p>
<p>Either way, there are a lot of parents here telling you similarly. The anecdotes you sought aren’t forthcoming or don’t equate to your situation.</p>
<p>I think you’ll flourish at your LAC if you just give it your heart and drop the crazy curiosity over whether you “would have” gotten in somewhere else.</p>
<p>If somewhere else still beckons, just do great next year and transfer in as a sophomore. No sleepless nights.</p>
<p>On Monday, with your parent/GC in the loop, you could contact the LAC to see if you can cancel the contract by mutual agreement (Dean J’s advice). If the LAC says no, then immediately pull your other applications (look at the calendar; needs to be done before they act upon them). </p>
<p>I am sorry at the moment you sound so alone in your thinking and decfision-making, but am glad you chose to post here for feedback.</p>
<p>
Then why do you not contact the ED school now? Why are you waiting until you hear from HYPS?</p>
<p>Cog,
Dean J gave you excellent advice. The LAC adcoms will most likely release you from your agreement so they can give your space to someone who’s dying to be at their school. But before you contact them, you had better make sure you will not regret that decision as well. I recommend that you speak to a therapist or a counselor. You might be experiencing very common ED remorse. I have seen this even in parents of kids were accepted early to almost-Ivy’s. The ED contract is by nature very Faustian, and certain personality types will always wonder “what if”. You can probably undo things, but be careful what you wish for.</p>
<p>“Don’t worry, no one will ever know who I am.I am taking extreme care.”</p>
<p>I certainly don’t advocate hacking, but your IP address is easily traceable from the CC server. </p>
<p>Since you’ve emailed Harvard and other colleges, your IP is on record with said institutions. It isn’t a long waltz to put together the two.</p>
<p>hmm perhaps the OP is one step ahead of that, and is using the computer from his the public library in a nearby city :]. try finding someone from the NYC public library</p>