<p>"Why in the world would he have to do something that is NOT him? We love to sell the concept of best fit when looking at schools. Well, here is a newsflash … there are plenty of schools that look for candidates that fit the description given by the OP. The key here is to prepare a compelling application that reflects the student honestly and accurately. "</p>
<p>Thank you as that was part of my point. I’ve tried suggesting. And yet, he just isn’t Mr. Outgoing. He is doing what he is fit to do… My daughter, on the other hand, will not have any trouble finding ec’s… She is only 10 and currently: plays the violin, plays in a prep strings group, plays the piano, sings in a community children’s choir, does community theater programs, sings in church children’s choir and musicals, has attended the Annie Moses Fine Arts camp for 3 years, has also gone on mission trips, and volunteers once a week at the local Alzheimer unit. She plays pe with the residents or plays music for them or does a craft or whatever. The activity director loves her. </p>
<p>That is her. She is outgoing and makes friends wherever she goes. She enters the sanctuary and greets every person she knows. My son just sits quietly in the sound booth. Both of these kids have the same parents and are just so totally different.</p>
<p>My two kids are opposites, but they are a reflection of their parents, after all. </p>
<p>When we look back over the extensive list of ECs for DD, there was a theme although she did not make an effort to choose similar things. For my son, his activities focused on building: engineering club, problem solving(he built for that), and then in sports, which were his only high school ECs, he built relationships and teams. </p>
<p>Look for a thread for your son, something that runs through all he does. Maybe it is his patience or his way of looking at things or the world. Good luck.</p>
<p>I don’t believe some of the long list of ECs on CC. It seems excessive for some reasons. Maybe some kids are lying for some reasons that I don’t know why.</p>
<p>Dr Google, I don’t believe the ECs either. They reek of resume-padding, which I’m sure colleges can spot a mile away. For that matter, I don’t believe all of the stats.</p>
<p>LasMa–no kidding. The top girl in our schools is one that has been a part of pretty much everything in the school…for one year/season. Her parents have her convinced that more is better. I have yet to come across a college that wants that. They would rather see 2 or 3 QUALITY EC-ones you have been in for 4 years, taken an active role in the club/sport/etc. vs a laundry list of things you did for a month.</p>
<p>Our kids have a longish list when you add in church and volunteer work–BUT, if you look at the hours spent, it isn’t overwhelming at all, and not really all that out of the ordinary. They were acolytes at church, for example, but only did that for one service/month on average so an hour/month–again, on the list but not all that time consuming. The ones that show they spend 15 hours/week doing 12 different activities need to go back to 2nd grade math and add that all up :D.</p>
<p>Lol, atomom, my thoughts exactly. Reminds me of sorority rush back in the day, a few members were always mentioning looking for “leaders”. I spoke up and said that we needed a few leaders but if we had a pledge class of 30 leaders it would get ugly.</p>
<p>Personal opinion is that unless the leadership is really, really impressive it’s not a big deal.
I think colleges just want someone with interests whether that’s academic, sports, the arts, volunteering, paid job,whatever. I know several students (including mine) who did fine with college apps but had only very minor leadership roles.</p>
<p>I’m not so sure about that. Not only did we have a girl who resume-padded, but she didn’t even do most of the activities she had listed. My D and her best friend both won awards at graduation (1 for leadership and 1 for student involvement) and both said they had never seen her at any club etc that she claimed to be a part of. </p>
<p>So, what happens to that girl? Well, she gets awarded a HUGE scholarship where she literally won’t pay a penny for college for anything (even books, fees, etc). People who know the story are sick that nobody seems to have seen through the deception.</p>
<p>I think all this emphasis on “leadership” for students has had some negative results. Many recent college graduates think they are a lot more special than they are. They think they are leaders because they got elected to some club presidency in school, but they have never learned to follow orders, identify unspoken hierarchies, or work their way up any ladder. They don’t take criticism and instruction very well. Ironically, they are hampered in their quest for leadership in the workplace, where it actually matters. You see these types all the time on shows like “The Apprentice.”</p>
<p>Leadership is a response to situations, not a rigid trait that some have and others don’t. I wish more kids understood this. I dislike seeing “leadership” on a list of check-box items, as if it can be measured like GPA.</p>
<p>OP, I have a good friend with a D who was also homeschooled, also took classes at the local CC, also did many of the same EC’s stuff your S is doing, and is also deeply involved in her church. She got into Baylor with a substantial merit financial aid package. Another school covered more of the cost, which WAS a factor, so she went there instead, but I bet your S has a very good shot at Baylor and probably the others too. I wouldn’t stress, and I agree with others-stop reading the chance boards. I didn’t even know they existed when my fairly average student applied to college and she did just fine. I would have wanted to shoot myself if I thought she needed to be like the kids on these boards often seem to be. Good luck.</p>
<p>Other than one season as a capt. of the j.v. football team, S1 had no h.s. related leadership roles. He wasn’t the president or founder of any club,etc. He gained all his leadership experience working as a customer service clerk at a local grocery store (was able to transfer to a store in his college town so worked for same chain for more than 5 years). </p>
<p>When he interviewed for a NROTC scholarship, he said the interviewer was more interested in the skills he’d learned on the job than his gpa/SAT score.</p>
<p>OP, my son was also an Indian. His only leadership position was spending a year as his boy scout troop’s Senior Patrol Leader - which he really didn’t enjoy. </p>
<p>I wrote a Parent Recommendation for him to Union College (yes, they ask for parent recs under the guise, “Who knows your kid better?”). In it I wrote:</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>In the end he was admitted with merit money to Union, but chose to attend Lafayette. He also got into Providence, Stonehill (honors/merit $), UVM (merit $), and was waitlisted at Colby. No rejections.</p>
<p>I find the expression odd either way, but this version does make much more sense (I’d never heard either version before) since chiefs are theoretically Indians as well.</p>
<p>I didn’t have leadership positions at all. However, senior years I found ways to work behind the scenes, and I used those positions to help my resume. I’m not sure if they helped or not, but you don’t have to have a billion scholarships to get into a college with holistic admissions.</p>
<p>Delightful thread, unfortunate title. I did find it racist against the Indian subcontinent, because we know that indigenous peoples of North America are Native Americans.</p>
<p>Sorry to be so PC, but I did stay away from the thread, but when it got to be 4 pages I figured it had to be about something else. I wonder if the title could still be changed.</p>
<p>OP: Your family is awesome. You wonderful doctor-husband who loves the tractor and family vacations sounds perfect and so does your son. And you.</p>
<p>I was never a group person. I am also a lone wolf. I don’t relish the committee work that comes with academics, but I don’t mind the hours alone grading papers and love time in the classroom.</p>
<p>My S is very solitary, and he had wonderful college acceptance results. My daughter less so, and she also had very happy results.</p>
<p>Colleges know they need all kinds of people. Some schools favor one personality type over another, and some don’t. I imagine your S will have many acceptances to choose from.</p>
<p>I wonder if the distinction is less between leaders and followers and more between introverts and extroverts. All the rhetoric about developing and displaying a passion for something has always struck me as leaning more towards the extrovert end of the spectrum. Is it possible for a student to have a consuming passion which s/he practices quietly in solitude – or does this passion need to be displayed through some sort of public event in a public venue? </p>
<p>Our child will need merit money for college, and lately I’ve been thinking about whether there’s an introvert equivalent to all the leadership scholarships that are on offer. Is it possible for someone to eventually change the world through something that they do quietly without a lot of fanfare? I think it probably is, but I don’t think we currently have any metrics for identifying it, measuring it or rewarding it. I’m thinking of socially awkward science types like Richard Feynman – would these guys have been written off by a twenty-something admissions interviewer today who scribbled in her notes that the guy displayed poor leadership qualities and seemed too nerdy for the school in question? I’m afraid I can picture it.</p>
<p>^My super nerdy almost pathologically introverted son did fine with admissions. He achieved at a very high level with computer programming. You can’t be so introverted that you can’t work with people, but working for others is fine. My son’s accomplishments were teaching himself Linux, getting an award from Gaming Magazine for a modification to a computer game, doing some volunteer work for a med school professor (which resulted in an extremely laudatory recommendation), and being hired at a professional level as a computer programmer which included contributions to well known company websites. Colleges are looking for different kinds of accomplishments. Not everyone needs to be a rah-rah in your face leader. He did most of the programming work sitting alone in his room.</p>
<p>I don’t think Richard Feynman was particularly socially awkward, and he was accomplished in many areas. His artwork sold well, and he was a member of an award winning Brazilian samba band (played drums.) But I take your point.</p>
<p>Schools look for different things. RF would be perfect at some schools, less so at others. He hated English and could never get above a B in it (which fueled his hatred.)</p>
<p>I love RF’s books, though. Haha.</p>
<p>One thing a more nerdy kid can do is contact a professor s/he would like to study with. That person might go to bad for him/her. Departments love nerdy kids who’ll be devoted to the work.</p>