I often told my kids when they were little “you can’t control how other people act, you can only control your reaction”. This thread makes me think a lot of people could stand to learn that.
Oy, I don’t know if I am a bad hostess or a good one. I don’t even own a decorative towel. I put out a roll of paper towels instead. I don’t like pretty soaps, I am afraid to use them unless i am the first one.
My pet work peeve is secretaries who can’t get their language correct, as in giving me documents that read: “The plaintiffs has” or “The plaintiff have.” Sadly, this happens even when they are recopying from typed notes that I have given them. They are SECRETARIES (and I used to be one, myself), so why can’t they get their plural vs. singular straight?
As a NY’er, my pet tourist peeve is people who walk in groups and then just stop in the middle of the sidewalk. This usually happens when I am rushing to Penn Station to catch a train and every second counts. Why can’t they move to the side?
The TV show Curb Your Enthusiasm hit on a lot of this kind of absurd stuff. Just off the top of my head, some episodes included:
The worker in a clothing store that objected to a customer refolding a shirt that he had just looked at. The worker unfolded it and refolded it himself, in front of the customer.
The homeowner who protested and yelled when he saw someone walk by and put a small piece of trash in the trash bin that the homeowner had set out on the curb for collection by the city.
The host that was deeply offended when a guest declined to take the “tour” of the host’s house.
I get bothered by women who get mad at me for holding a door open for them (I’m female by the way). If someone wants to hold a door open for me, I walk through and say “Thank you”. When I hold a door open for someone, I’m not asking for thanks, but I’m also not asking to be reprimanded. I hold doors open for anyone behind me regardless of gender, and I’ll wait (or rush ahead) to hold a door open for someone who has their hands full.
Recently at work I was berated by a woman who thought holding doors open was sexist. Personally I thought she was rude but figured it wasn’t worth getting into a philosophical conversation at the front door of the building. That wasn’t the first time it’s happened, but it hasn’t stopped me from continuing to open doors.
I am a woman who very much appreciates doors being held open, especially as I get older and doors seem to get heavier, so I thank you. I have raised my four sons to hold doors open and my D as well. I think it’s a common courtesy that all people can extend to each other. I guess I have a new pet peeve - people who react rudely to simple, gender neutral expressions of courtesy and common decency.
People who don’t park between the lines in parking lots.
In my office building, parking spaces are at a premium in the morning. Motorcycles take a whole space, though two could easily fit in one spot.
Bicyclists who don’t obey traffic laws and rip right through red lights.
trying to find ones not yet posted…
- anyone who cuts in line when there is a clear queue
- people who toss cigarette butts (or anything) out their car window
- neighbor music (usually from inside a car) so loud it rattles my windows!
- trucks and motorcycles that need mufflers
I’m not bothered by one damp hand towel. My theory is that it is damp because people washed their hands and then used it. So their hands were clean. Now if the towel isn’t absorbant, that annoys me. Like @doschicos, function over form is my preference.
I think putting out towels and soap you don’t expect people to use is pretentious.
Being called ‘Mom’ by anyone other than my kids. At the doctor’s office, at school, by their friends.
“The suspect fled on foot after robbing the bank…” when no one has been named. It’s not a suspect if it’s the person who actually committed the crime!
@ahl I love linen hand towels – Bella Lino carries an absolutely beautiful line. But I have to admit I rarely use mine. They are so pristine that I perceive guests are actually reluctant to use them – especially men. And if they do use them I think it is confusing what to do with them afterwards. They usually made an attempt to refold and place the hand towel back where it was, but at the end of the night I had 4 crumpled hand towels lying all over the powder room vanity. I always wondered what the last guests to use the restroom thought. This was especially true at occasions where there were a lot of young children present. Southern culture is probably different - the children grow up being exposed to this sort of thing.
In the last few years I have used the linen hand towels only for brunches with my girlfriends.
I only have towels I intend for folks to use. I thought that’s what most folks have in their homes. I hope I haven’t inadvertently given offense. Most homes I visit seem to have towels that appear meant to be used.
Re: decorative hand towels and soaps. My dear late MIL did this but also had work-a-day cloth towels and soap and I would always use those. It would make sense, though, as the holiday ends to actually use those things since the towels will get washed and put away and the soap shouldn’t stick around for next year (though a frugal housewife could melt and recast it in another holiday shape). A hand towel treated that carefully, while still in good shape, looks a little dated during its 17th annual appearance.
I just had a heart to heart with visiting D over the holidays: please tell me when I’ve gone too far and have guests sleeping on pillows that resemble Communion wafers or the guest bath has a rug, as she pointed out, that bears what look like bullet holes. Replacement pillows are maybe $8 and the rug in the very low double digits. We have a set of bath towels that are at least 15 years old that are bleached with acne meds from teenagers that now have 401ks that are sitting in a bag to be taken to a vet or animal shelter.
As to the original question, I don’t think any “little thing” bothers me, only the monumental, grating, civilization destroying habits of people I live or work with or run across in the space between those two buildings.
I don’t understand why anyone objects to having shopping carts returned. If I’m feeling particularly energetic, I will round up a few with mine to return. If someone’s waiting for my space, I will see if they want to use my cart so I will vacate my sooner, but otherwise I always try to return my cart. There are often multiple strategic places to return carts in the parking lot.
The infirm and those with little kids in hot car seats are exempted but I think most able-bodied should otherwise return their carts. Having to have employees wrangle carts adds to overhead costs and mean higher prices for all and lower profits for the store.
I use the disposable towelettes in my powder rooms. They sell a wide range of products including ones that almost feel like fabric. I have a nice tray to place them on and vary the towelette design based on the season. No one is confused and there is no laundering.
But in defense of the poster who posted about decorative towels not meant to be utilized, they do sell them so yes people do place them in their homes. I think she is referring to the types of towels that have tassels or other decorative features rendering them not suitable for laundering. I am thinking she is referring to something like this:
@Marian - why couldn’t you have strapped your kids into their car seats, then loaded up the grocery into the trunk and then returned the cart. Your kids might have screamed/cried while in car seats, but they certainly would have been safe.
That is what I did, but these days I definitely would not, unless the car return was right next to where I parked, since I’d be worried a well meaning good samaritan would report me for leaving my children unattended.
My pet peeve is being over 60 and called young lady by folks I don’t know. I also dislike being called sweetie by waitstaff, though I make an exception for a very nice young woman at my regular lunch spot. Probably that is what she calls her grandmama.
^lol @lefthandofdog
We’ve got a lot of stuff equivalent in condition to your Communion wafer pillows or bullet hole bath rugs. I used to be better at purging worn out or unused items but havn’t done a good job of that lately.
We plan to downsize and relocate very soon when our youngest goes to college, and I told my husband that my plan was to just sell and donate 90% of our possessions and buy new things for our new house. It would be easier and more cost effective to do that instead of packing and moving a bunch of old worn out things.
As far as the disposable hand towels, I had to google them to see what they were. I didn’t know there was such a thing as I’m not really up on the latest home decor trends. I think I’d would have figured out what they were and would have used them if I saw them in anyone’s guest bathroom though.
My pet peeve is when I’m asked if I’m my teenagers’ grandparent (I’m not yet sixty). I’d rather be called young lady. I used to get ticked off when people would call me “kid” at work, which went on until I was about 40. I miss those days.