I think the only thing I did intentionally differently was tell my second not to check the PSAT box. Not sure he listened, we got plenty of mail, but not nearly as much. My kids were so different. I’d already made oldest apply EA and so did the younger one. Oldest hated visiting, youngest wanted to visit. Oldest had known his major since he was in elementary school, youngest hadn’t a clue (though he got an inkling once he started researching possibilities - and he used that thought to winnow the list.) Oldest hated writing essays. Youngest enjoys writing and knew that what he said needed to be good as his grades and scores were uneven. It all worked out in the end. Both applied to a lot of reaches and two safeties.
Interview whenever one is offered. Most schools say it doesn’t matter that much, or that it isn’t counted as significantly as other aspects of the application, but for schools that offer an interview, it can make all the difference. This is particularly true when your kid has all the stats to be admitted, and is being compared against students with similar stats, who also interviewed. Why not show interest in the school and your own personality any time you can?
@menloparkmom in his sophomore class, yes. However, I know he is near the low side of the range. The test prep company does a great job. In my opinion, it’s the best thing the school offers our students.
S21 will be studying his tushie off for the PSAT. I had never heard of National Merit when D16 took it. She was two points off the cut-off. Fun fact: one private school in our state nets 25% - 30% of all National Merit Semi-Finalists. Prep much?
I would do many of the things I’ve seen mentioned here, but I’ll add one more. I would start taking my son to do campus visits earlier. When he started visiting the schools and hearing the requirements, he got a lot more serious about his school work. It also is time consuming and I hate for him to miss too much school in a semester.
"one private school in our state nets 25% - 30% of all National Merit Semi-Finalists. "
uh, I dont think so given there are about 16,000 NMSF’s nationwide each year.
I’m sure you meant that 25-30% of the Sr’s at that private school each year are NMSF’s.
Or 25% - 30% of all NMSFs in Hawai’i go to that one school?
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As a student, I wished that I seriously considered and applied to more different types of colleges/universities (small research, large research, liberal arts, public, private). I mainly looked at large research universities public and private, and, though I am happy where I went (a medium size private research university), I do wish that I had looked at more small liberal arts colleges.
You never know if your kid might change his/her mind at some point in the application process like I did until it happens. Hopefully, if your kid applies to different types of schools, then he/she can change his/her mind at any point through April.
See if you can get your student interested in exploring different types of colleges, however you may do that.
Early Action, yes! My second has an acceptance to an EA school he likes with merit money. It really takes the pressure off.
I would not do anything differently. Our family basically had fun with the process. Got to spend wonderful time together on D’s trips to interviews. I spent about 2 years compiling the list of colleges for my own fun. It was not intended to be used for my D., I just wanted to see what is out there. My spreadsheet was huge with very few colleges but lots and lots of information for each college, including information about D’s very wide range of interests and opportunities for them at each place. Well, when it was time for D. to apply, I simply told her that I have a list but she did not have to use it. She loved it and used it, organized the colleges in her preference sequence and applied to only colleges on my list and eventually attended at her #2. She had great 4 years at her college. She loved mu college list so much that later she asked me to compile the list of medical schools to apply, but this was so much easier, it took me about 30 min. to do. Overall, D’s application cycles to both colleges and medical schools were fun and excitement and wonderful time that we will always remember.
Best wishes to all applying soon, relax, have fun, this is a special time for a family, have positive outlook and it will make your kids feel the same!
I wouldn’t have made S bother to apply to any regional or national scholarships–just the local ones. I would not have allowed him to check the dual citizenship box, since that put in the international student admissions category for schools like Yale. In that grouping he was far less competitive an applicant due to needing FA and not offering true diversity since he had lived all his life in the US. Also, a second time around we would have a much better idea of how to write an admissions essay. Looking back, he blew it on the essays because he saw them as writing samples.
@menloparkmom & @ItsJustSchool I meant for the state. I should have been more clear. From the press releases:
2016
Sixty-six high school seniors in the state of Hawai’i qualified as National Merit Scholarship Semifinalists. 'Iolani students represent 29 percent of that accomplished group.
2015
Sixty-four high school seniors in the state of Hawai’i qualified as National Merit Scholarship Semifinalists. 'Iolani students represent 33 percent of that accomplished group.
2014
A total of 68 high school seniors in the state of Hawai’i qualified as National Merit Scholarship Semifinalists. 'Iolani students represent 24 percent of that accomplished group.
2013
A total of 70 high school seniors in the state of Hawai’i qualified as National Merit Scholarship Semifinalists. 'Iolani students represent 43 percent of that accomplished group.
If the private school selects for high test takers they are likely to also test well for the PSAT. My older son got a NMS qualifying score as a sophomore and I was surprised at how much mail he got from prep schools. Come to Andover! Come to Exeter!
Going back in time? Hired someone to prep D2 for the PSAT. Would have gotten more involved in D1’s short list of schools to transfer to, from 2 years at community college. Not sure about letting D2 apply to schools we could not afford. On one hand, maybe it was a big boost for her to know she was accepted?
Lessons learned:
- Visit (not necessarily taking the official tour) as many colleges as possible, as soon as possible. Do it in a way that's fun for the kid (buy a t-shirt if kid starts to complain that it's boring). Seems very important to give kids an idea of what's out there: big, small, rural, seaside, urban, neo-Gothic, etc. Once they can visualize what all the college hubbub is about, they will have a reason to study harder.
- SAT/ACT/PSAT scores are really really really important. Whether it's financial aid or admission or confidence, higher scores can make a huge difference.
- Take as many community college courses as possible during summers, starting as early as after freshman year of high school. This takes away some of the fear of college kids have, and in many cases every $200 community college class the kid passes is a $1000-$5000 class he/she/you wont have to pay for years later. A lot of colleges (though usually not the elites) will even accept online college courses taken in high school.
- Take AP exams very seriously, and shop around for how many credits you can get...the variance among colleges is amazingly wide.
- Don't be hesitant to cash in on skills a kid already has. My kids grew up speaking a foreign language to their mother at home...they breezed to a 5 on the AP in that language without taking any courses in it. Places like Michigan State and Nebraska give SIXTEEN credits for a 5 in a foreign language. Kid is good at volleyball? Have him/her take a college course in COACHING volleyball while still in high school, rather than playing volleyball--coaching courses usually grant more credits and often transfer, whereas how-to-play courses often don't.
- Know thy kid. If kiddo isn't especially mature/stable/confident, a college more than a 4-6 hour drive from home might be asking for trouble. You want to give them room to breathe and an opportunity to mature, but there's something about being within about a half-day's drive that comforts you and the kid.
- Wow, who knew sororities and fraternities were so expensive?
- Streamline the extra-curriculars, and try to get leadership positions.
- Don't be afraid of out-of-state public schools. Some give great financial aid, are generous with AP credits, readily accept college credits earned in high school (even online courses), and/or aren't particular expensive in the first place (anybody check out the out-of-state tuition at U of S. Dakota and S. Dakota State?).
If I were doing it over again for my D16, we definitely would have done more test prep. She has always struggled with standardized testing and we did have some targeted tutoring, but not enough in retrospect. She managed to get her scores up to where she could be admitted to all the schools she wanted, but not high enough to be offered merit aid at the more expensive ones. Its very frustrating that so much money can depend on the results of a test.
@TheGFG, do you have the option of not checking the dual citizenship box if that indeed is what the student has? I haven’t looked at apps in a couple of years, but I didn’t think questions around citizenship status were optional. Not saying it seems fair to treat a dual citizen as international (it does not).
Wow, @moooop. What a thoughtful response. I had no idea about the coaching point. Thank you!
With a D15, D16 and S19 I am doing this the second time around. The only problem is the 3 kids are so different that what I learned for #1 doesn’t apply to #2.
But when I think not just in terms of their distinct personalities here is my advice:
Don’t apply to any school you really don’t want to attend. D15’s academic and financial safety wasn’t really a safety because she really didn’t want to go there. Her other safety was only affordable with good merit aid which didn’t come through. In the end it was nip and tuck until one of her low reaches came through. Last spring would have been much more pleasant if she had had a true academic and financial safety.
Test early and often.
Senior year talk about college issues with child only when absolutely necessary. Home needed to be a safe place and I needed to stop processing my stress with her and turn to other outlets instead. That’s how I ended up here :-j
We just went through the second time!
Things I did differently:
- Started visiting earlier and spread the visits further apart
- Offered test prep, but didn't force it upon S2
- Visited many more safeties and likely match schools with S2
- Encouraged (but didn't force) an early decision choice
Outcome:
The exact same. S2 is going to the same school (ED) where S1 is already attending . . .but with a mere fraction of the stress.