<p>I think we should be able to see the grades.</p>
<p>So far, I’ve never accessed any medical info, but it is good to have the requisite forms in place so if our kids need medical help and need us to advocate for them their healthcare providers are authorized to confer with us. I agree that it would be bad if the kids would hesitate to get appropriate care thinking we would find out and families need to have the needed discussions and trust that empowers their kids and allows them privacy.</p>
<p>I may be a contrarion in this discussion, and this is why. My sense is this time when our children go off to college is a time for exploration, asking questions, and shaping who they want to be in the years ahead. Our children hopefully will challenge themselves and when they fail pick themselves up and try again.
If they have their transcripts given to their parents then maybe they might not take that tough course out of fear of disappointing us. If they take the courses required, and add courses of interest then maybe that will give them the impetitous to keep learning long after college.
As hard as it was to not ask our DD what her report card was after the first quarter, I just bit my tongue. Instead I asked if she passed-and was assured that she did. Isn’t that the bottom line? Obviously, whatever graduate school program she elects to undertake will take into account her transcript-and that is when she has to face the piper so to speak. It will have to come from her, as an adult responsible for her actions. We told her we would help with the finances of college for four years-after that she is on her own. So, if it takes her longer than 4 years to earn her BA, it will cost her more. And if she does not excel/do well in her courses, then that will affect her choices for graduate school, just as her high school coursework affected her choices for college.
We also told her that should she "elect’ to drop out of college, then she will be financially responsible for any fees/charges assessed by the school. This discussion took place when we were filling out the initial FAFSA/financial aid forms.
my two cents…APOL</p>
<p>FERPA, which stands for the Family Educational Rights and Family Act is intended to protect the privacy of parents and children in the educational arena. It is not intended to block your right to access the information. </p>
<p>Unfortunately, many schools use it as a shield because they do not want to bother establishing whether you are entitled to see the grades or not. Colleges and universities are subject to sanctions if they reveal confidential information, so the easiest way for them to ensure that they are not releasing in error is to “require” a release. HOWEVER, if that child is your dependent, even without a release, you can access the records as long as you can prove to the school that he/she is your dependent.</p>
<p>A very simplified summary of the law is that as long as your undergraduate child is your dependent on your income tax, you have an absolute right to access that child’s academic records. </p>
<p>Someone asked about emergency situations: In the case of an emergency, there are exemptions in the law that allow the schools to notify family of health, welfare, etc. issues pertaining to the student.</p>
<p>OF COURSE, THE SIMPLEST METHOD IS TO HAVE A RELEASE!</p>
<p>I concur with APOL.</p>
<p>College freshman son knows he can share grades if he wants (and has shared just one grade that he was disappointed in this past semester). But he also knows that it’s his show now and he has to be happy with his effort and performance. Our commitment to paying the bills was not contingent on achievement.</p>
<p>We are spending our “hovering” allowance on our younger highschool sophomore, now.</p>
<p>If my kiddos were having a medical or financial emergency, I sure wouldn’t want to be arguing about the law because I opted not to bother with getting my kid to sign a release.</p>
<p>I respect my kids’ privacy but think its in their best interests that I can act as their agent as needed. I expect them to handle things on their own except for emergencies that hopefully won’t come up (my folks never intervened when my sibs & I were in college–they never even knew about our medical crises until years later). Maybe we were somewhat more independent, but I want my kids to develop increasing independence anyway.</p>
<p>APOL: You’re not a contrarian at all. Many of us totally agree with you. I managed to have 13 years worth of kids at college wtihout ever having to ask someone else something about them. If I wanted to know their grades, I asked. If I wanted to know about their bills, I asked. Usually, they just told me. </p>
<p>At what age are we not their agent any more? College? After they get their first real job? Do we wait until they are married? Maybe I just prefer to have them come to me when they need me, than to have to go around them to find things out. JMHO</p>
<p>S is a junior in college. He gave me his ID and password. I can access anything needed. Much easier than any form and does not let me into more personal areas like his e- mail or anything. But I can double check schedule, transcript, tuition, etc. Easy solution.</p>
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<p>I agree. </p>
<p>And, like APOL, I discussed with S that my commitment was not contingent on MY satisfaction with HIS level of achievement. I did make it clear that the amount of my commitment was the original balance after the merit awards (plus any uncovered increases in tutition, etc by the college), so that he was responsible for any scholarship money that might be lost/forfeited by not maintaining the GPA required by the college.</p>
<p>He tells me some course grades, but I find that I don’t ask about grades and this has worked out well for us.</p>
<p>S’s college has a medical disclosure form that is filled out for each treatment. And, there is a policy about emergencies. It is routed to the Dean and if deemed an emergency that relates to certain levels and types of concern, the parents ARE notified. Seems reasonable to me.</p>