<p>Carolyn,
I agree–those wonderful teachers need to know how much of a difference they make! I think I would ALSO like to send it to some of the unthinking, callous teachers and coaches that have crossed paths (swords?) with my kids. </p>
<p>Many of my kids’ elementary school teachers have been wonderful and had that undefinable gift of being able to make a child feel as if they were special. Unfortunately we have not encountered very many in our high school (but it IS in the Newsweek top 100–woo hoo!) </p>
<p>My youngest (who needs a mega B-12 booster of self esteem) had a biology teacher in 10th grade who made her feel as if she were the funniest, most clever 10th grader around. Then she aided for this teacher when she unexpectedly had a free period the next semester. This teacher was able to bring out my daughter’s confidence over her innate shyness, she was able to convey that she genuinely LIKES my daughter. I suspect that this teacher makes many of her students feel this way too, but this was a new and heartwarming experience for my D. Really gifted teachers, in addition to their teaching skills and knowledge of subject matter, also have this ability to make kids feel valued.</p>
<p>However, this same high school has a voice teacher who told my older D (one month before her college auditions) that her voice was so bad that she must have vocal nodules (she didn’t.) It has a drama teacher who encouraged my D to enroll in a special critics program and then pulled the plug without telling my D the day the applications were due. It has a basketball coach who told a player that she was worthless and contributed nothing to the team and told the whole team that they were losers with a capital L. </p>
<p>I wish the negative teachers/coaches could understand how their words have the power to wound, that they hold our childrens’ hearts in their hands sometimes. Just as a supportive word from a respected teacher can ennervate a a reluctant learner, so too can destructive words undermine a teen’s self-confidence.</p>
<p>Just a few weeks ago, I was thinking about the people in my son’s school career who’ve had the most impact. He’s not a sports guy nor a music guy, so there were no coaches or music teachers in the bunch. But I remembered back to 2nd grade, when we lived on the other side of the country. It had become clear to his teacher that he was well beyond not just the mechanics but the thought processes behind the mathematics she was teaching that year. The lower school principal, Mister D, who used to be a math teacher, took my son and a girl from the same grade into his office twice a week for “special math with Mister D”. They sprawled on the floor and covered pages and pages of graph paper as they explored new ideas and pushed to learn more. It was one of his favorite times of the week. Mister D was one of the reasons I cried when we moved west.</p>
<p>After the move, my son continued devouring anything having to do with math, science, and technology, and then found he also loved to devour literature and history and economics and photography. I made sure to track down Mister D a few years ago at the new school where he headed admissions, to let him know things were going well with my son. </p>
<p>Last month, as my son prepared to graduate from HS and get ready for MIT in the fall, I thought to contact Mister D again to give him the news and thank him for the enthusiastic start he provided all his young charges. I was shocked and saddened to learn that he had died of a massive heart attack two years ago. We’ve decided to send a contribution to the school’s memorial fund, to honor Mister D for the wonderful and committed educator he was.</p>
<p>My sons too have been incredibly lucky to have teachers that go above & beyond just teaching (guidance counselor too - we are so lucky). I wouldn’t even know how to repay their kindness, ethical/moral standards, & their love of teaching. They are the best:)</p>
<p>Our district participates in the “Teacher Excellence Award” program, and has its own “Extra Mile” awards. Students or parents can nominate a teacher or staff member by writing a few paragraphs about why that person deserves to be honored. I think the nominees get copies of the essays, too. Many people participate throughout our elementary, middle and high school, so there are clearly many teachers and staff who make a difference!</p>
<p>I think that parents have the most impact on a child’s life. I did write my son’s history teacher an e-mail telling him what a terrific teacher he was, though. (and copied the principal for good measure…they’d better keep this guy around!)</p>
<p>Well, I’m curious: Does anyone care to share a story about a teacher that made a difference in YOUR life, not your child’s?</p>
<p>For me, it was Mr. Robert Rittner, my high school history teacher. He was the first teacher to really challenge me, to turn me on to a subject, and to get me to see that learning was something that didn’t REQUIRE a teacher at all, just a willingness to explore, read and research. It’s funny, because, looking back, I remember so many of my fellow students complaining about how much thinking Mr. Rittner required us to do — yet, for me, that was the true start of any intellectual life I have had. :)</p>
<p>I’ll share…Mine was my high school choir director Clair McElfresh (anyone else out there know him??). We all called him Mac, and he was a fabulous teacher, mentor and friend. He taught me the value of discipline and believing that I COULD do things that were more difficult than I thought I could do. He pushed me (and the rest of the choir) beyond what many would think a high school group could do. He inspired comraderie in a way that I have never known since. And he expected excellence at all times. I still have recordings (now burned onto CD) of those groups…things I cherish. I can remember every piece of music I learned with this man. That I can remember so much about him after many many years is a testament to how influential he really was to me.</p>
<p>For me it was a history teacher named Richard Flaim. This was the first time in my life (ninth grade) where we didn’t just focus on memorizing dates and names, but read primary and secondary sources, looked at multiple perspectives and cultural context. It was like a world opened up to me, a scholarly world which encouraged differing opinions but required supporting arguments based on sources.</p>
<p>In reply to Carolyn’s question - Maxine Hancock, my high school science teacher who taught all four years of college prep science. She was a dynamic person and a superb teacher who inspired a love of science in all her students. Furthermore, she understood teenagers. She was able to firmly control unruly students while maintaining a twinkle in her eye. Everyone adored her. </p>
<p>My high school was tiny, had few extras, and was overall quite insignificant. Nevertheless, during my first year of college I easily sailed through a notoriously difficult physics course because of the excellence of my high school course.</p>
<p>carolyn, mine is easy. History prof in undergrad. I turned in a paper that was pretty darn good, while my buddy turned in a piece of crap and got a half a letter grade higher. I was …not pleased. I marched into Dr.V’s office . I plunked down both papers. I defied him to find a way to justify his obviously insane grading. He never flinched. Just puffed on his meerschaum filled with his favorite blend of tobacco, in his basement office with his couple of thousand paperbacks lining ever available inch , floor to ceiling, on all four walls.</p>
<p>He smiled and let me go on and on about what I had put in my paper and Fred had failed to put in his. Nodding occasionally at appropriate points in my impassioned presentation, he never once glanced at the papers.</p>
<p>After a good long while, I started running out of steam. When it appeared I had come to a full stop he said ,“Finished?” I said that I was. He proceeded to quote from my paper from his memory. And quote and quote and quote some more.:eek: He then said, “Mr.H, for you this is “hook” work (C work). It is schlock. Mr. W’s paper represented “hook+” work from him. It is also schlock. I can’t see anway that this simple concept can be confusing to someone of your intellect.”</p>
<p>I slunk out of the room to go study with my tail between my legs. How the H did he do THAT? He became my mentor, and lifelong friend. He expected better from me and he got it. He told me I was “smart” and I believed him. It was probably a decade later that I realized he couldn’t have known much about my true intelligence or lack thereof. It was our first graded assignment, and I was a new transfer student. LOL.</p>
<p>Cur, great story. Kind of explains a few things about you too. </p>
<p>The common theme in all of the parent-teacher stories so far is that the teacher we remember making a difference is the one who stood by us when we were leaning out into the intellectual ledge for the first time — and either gave us a push, or convinced us that we could fly.</p>
<p>My 5th grade teacher, Miss Weber changed my life. I had just spent the 4th grade with a teacher, Mrs. Dotson, who, on a daily basis, would have math races at the blackboard. Two kids would race to solve the same problem. The one who got it first was left standing til the whole class had been up at the board. I ALWAYS won. One day in the spring I made a mistake. The teacher stood me up in front of the whole class and said, “See? She thinks she’s so smart. She’s not so smart after all, is she?” All the other kids burst out in laughter and I slunk back to my seat and made it a point to NEVER win again. In 5th grade, Miss Weber believed in me and gave me harder work, extra assignments, had me read to the 4th graders, and, at the end of my year, wrote “To my star pupil who will do great things!” in my yearbook. If you’re out there, Miss Weber, thank you, thank you, thank you.</p>
<p>Wow, Quiltguru, that sums up my post# 21 in a nutshell. Here’s to the Miss Webers of the world. And I hope our society will do more to lure future Miss Webers into teaching.</p>
<p>I am trying to contact Robert Rittner.I am a long time friend who knew Robert in Woodridge NY. His wife’s name is Bernadette.
Please contact me with any information or forward this thread to him.Robert will know me immediatly.
Thanks for your help.</p>
<p>I too was a member of the CHHS Choir under the “baton” (actually, he preferred a pencil!) of Clair McElfresh. Because of his influence and that of my jr-high choral director Joy Lawrence, I have a deep affection for all sorts of classical music, but especially opera. “Mac” was a tough taskmaster when the situation called for it. I remember one time when he banished from the rehearsal almost a dozen of our top singers for failing to learn the proper pronunciation of some German text in one of our performance pieces. (That was one day I was glad to have had a couple years of German under my belt!) But every one of our 110 singers (we were a BIG school) would do anything to keep from disappointing him, which is why we did so well onstage. Even today it’s almost unheard of for choirs to sing without sheet music, yet we memorized every piece we ever performed. That included some pretty complicated stuff, including Bernstein’s “Chichester Psalms” and Poulenc’s “Gloria.” Four memories stand out from my two years under Mac’s tutelage. First,we were on tour over spring vacation to Colorado (the main motivator for me to move to Denver 14 years later), and we sang several segments of the Mozart Requiem a cappella in an eerily empty and cavernous chapel at the Air Force Academy. Second, we participated in performing a world premiere of Shalom Secunda’s “Yizkor,” his musical memorial to the Holocaust. I was excited to meet the composer who was best known for having written dozens of Yiddish musicals for the New York stage and also one of my grandmother’s heroes. Third, we gathered on the deck of an old rust-bucket cruise ship on our way to a spring-break tour of Bermuda, singing Mac’s minor-key arrangement of “My Country 'Tis of Thee” as we sailed past the Statue of Liberty. Fourth, I stood backstage filled with excitement as my best friend, tenor Mark Hein, belted out “Vesta la Giubba” from Pagliacci and did a very credible job for a 17-year-old.</p>
<p>It was a guidance counselor for me . He pulled me aside one day and asked" what are you doing in this college?" (a community college and I had a 4.0 GPA at the time)- He introduced me to NYU and told me my GPA at NYU would be around 2.8, but that I should apply. His concern and interest was extremely helpful. I once listed for fun the ten most influential people in my life and he was very high on the list! Thank you Mr. Christensen… where ever you are!</p>
<p>My 11th grade English teacher, LaRose Todd set me on the road to be the excellent writer that I eventually became. She was the toughest grader, but she pushed all of us in her honors English class to analyze, compare, contrast and organize our throughts in a way that we never had before. She was very young and attractive and glamorous, but she loved her subject and she loved teaching us. She is the first teacher–and one of very few I had in all my years of undergraduate and postgraduate education–that pushed me farther than I thought I could go.</p>
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