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<p>Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. but i think it was rather provoking asian americans…as if going out with a white girl is so out of reach that it can only be depicted happening to some lucky ■■■■■■■ (john cho) on the big screen.</p>
<p>o wait nvm the girl was latin lol</p>
<p>I’m an Asian girl. I’m attracted to white guys most and Asian guys least. Blacks and Hispanics and everything else falls invariably between the white guys and the Asians.</p>
<p>For the most part, I am inherently uncomfortably around Asian guys. I grew up with them, and I have known abusive ones. Therefore, I unfortunately can’t help feeling that Asian men are more abusive, though it’s not true. </p>
<p>I’m most comfortable with white guys. I feel like I have more in common in them, once I get past the genetic stuff.</p>
<p>This doesn’t mean I don’t find Asian guys physically attractive. I think Daniel Henney (a half-Korean model) and Sandy (a black model) equally attractive, despite not looking alike at all.</p>
<p>I guess it’s more of a preference and psychological thing.</p>
<p>Oh god, it’s Effulgent again. Quite frankly, I dread of reading what you post in race threads because it’s always the same: </p>
<p>white = good
Asian = bad</p>
<p>Don’t you think that there’s something incredibly skewered and wrong in your perception when you stereotype hundreds of millions of guys based on an image that you yourself have admitted is probably untrue? You have known some abusive Asians? Whoop dee doo. If you were equally committed to turning your back on white guys, you’d watch one episode of COPS and say that every white guy was a drunk and overweight wife-beater. </p>
<p>The thing is that the whites-only Asian girls don’t like white guys because of “manliness” or “strength”. If so, then a good-looking stud like Reggie Bush (who is black) who has muscles to spare and completely dominates and humiliates other guys would be on top of their list. But I rarely hear of Asian girls having a preference for black guys, who are stereotyped as being the most manly of men. If indeed Asian guys were being rejected for being too wimpy and weak, then why would Asian girls prefer white guys, who are wimpy and weak compared to black guys? (note: all this is referring to cultural stereotypes, and in no way am I trying to validate these social images).</p>
<p>Simple. It’s because of society and media. The whites have everything, and if you want access to that, you must be like them. The ultimate “in thing” would be to marry into their families, and have children that look very white so that gradually, your Asianness will go away, simply becoming an interesting factoid in your distant genetics. </p>
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<p>Some Asian girls say that they don’t like Asian guys because they grew up around them all the time and think of all Asian guys as brothers. Some say that they grew up around white guys and learned to prefer them. Two very contradictory statements, which bother go against Asians and favour whites. Geez, what a surprise. They’re two very weak arguments to justify racism anyway.</p>
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<p>Oh Christ. Thank you for tolerating the half-Koreanness of Daniel Henney, O enlightened one.</p>
<p>obviously Effulgent hasnt met me</p>
<p>and obviously nba chris is outta touch w/ fobs and fobulous ppl like me</p>
<p>Chill, nbachris. I have just have trouble getting comfortable around Asian guys.</p>
<p>I’m Asian, so obviously my family would be mostly Asian. I don’t think of Asians as bad people. I’m not racist against my own race! I love certain aspects of Asian culture, as I love certain aspects of every culture. I just don’t embrace simply because I’m one of them.</p>
<p>However, you try erasing a childhood filled with uncles who terrorized you, a grandfather who treated you like a completely worthless slave, and then going to Asia all the time to watch people die and kill each other over food. I grew up with people (not family, though) that beat their kids to a pulp. It was the “traditional” thing to do, to “respect” all your elders no matter how wrong you thought they were. </p>
<p>You try erasing that image of your “babysitter” who whipped the crap out of you because you didn’t like your dinner, and then hiding the scars and bruises so your parents don’t get more depressed than they already were.</p>
<p>It’s heartbreaking, and it’s something I don’t want to deal with. I’m not saying this is typical, but it’s not like I can shrug it off.</p>
<p>And then, suddenly I’m introduced into “the white world” where my parents moved into a better neighborhood. I’m not saying Asians are worse, but my new lifestyle was nicer, was more peaceful, and less war-stricken. And, there were also more blacks, Hispanics, and whites. I felt like I had more freedom.</p>
<p>“Simple. It’s because of society and media. The whites have everything, and if you want access to that, you must be like them.”</p>
<p>Yes. Society and media. I’m not denying it; the media consumes my life.</p>
<p>And it’s not like I can control who I’m attracted to. If I can, please enlighten me.</p>
<p>somehow this got personal, but i’m really sorry Effulgent…</p>
<p>sorry if i come out cold but an uncle who ‘terrorizes’ (i hope that’s not what i think it means) or babysitters who whip you could’ve been had by anyone regardless of their race and their family’s. </p>
<p>it’s good that you recognize that this abusive nature is not true of all asians but if you use your childhood trauma as an excuse (which you affirmed yourself was falsely labelling asians) for your mentality towards us, what good is it?</p>
<p>and of course you can’t control who you are attracted to, you are definitely right about that :).</p>
<p>i think what effulgent is saying is that her childhood experiences have made her uncomfortable around asian men, which is why she leans more towards white guys/guys of different races.</p>
<p>No matter how bad effulgent’s background is, and i do feel sorry that you had to go thru that, i feel its unfair to generalize your own childhood to an entire culture and race.</p>
<p>I grew up with my chinese parents NEVER having to whip me or anything, nor any kind of physical abuse. And most of my chinese friends haven’t, either. Although i’ve heard of many cases where chinese parents “whip” their kids, i’ve also heard of many cases of white parents beating the “crap” out of their kids. Take a look at Eminem’s parents, for example. </p>
<p>Its more about the social factors in your childhood, which is applicable in any country and in any culture.</p>
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<p>Urrr… where is this? the majority of Asia, ie China, Japan, Korea, haven’t gone thru anything like this in the past 50 years. Sry, but you are unfairly catagorizing Asia as a pseudo-africa. Speaking of which, doesn’t that preclude you from marrying an African-American as well? since Africa has a much worse case of “people killing each other for food”</p>
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i don’t have a problem with her preference towards white guys/hispanics/blacks over asians. all i wanted is to stop her justifying her predisposition towards asian men with her stressful childhood. and i’m sure it was more than stressful…i meant it when i don’t mean to sound harsh. it’s just that she acknowledged that you know that all asian men are not like that so i just wanted to help her continue along that line.</p>
<p>Yes to what hotpiece said.</p>
<p>And no, neoking, I was not sexually abused.</p>
<p>I KNOW it’s not true of all Asians (or most Asians). But it’s not something I can easily let go of. When it’s made such an impact on your life, it takes more than saying “I know that isn’t true” to make the feelings/fear go away.</p>
<p>It’s like getting shot on a bus at a young age. You know that it does not happen on nearly every single bus; but really, how easy is it to get rid of that fear? It’s a LOT harder than simply thinking it, I can tell you that.</p>
<p>Again, you obviously lived in a war-torn country. Which is a tiny-tiny-tiny-tiny representation of Asia. Think China, Japan, Korea…</p>
<p>It must have to do with a confining minority group. I dunno how numbered Asian people are in Florida, but living in Cali, I surely would not associate physical discipline (which I recieved often, deservingly) with my race.</p>
<p>Why does everyone assume it’s just so EASY? And yes, it’s unfair for me to feel that way, but I don’t treat Asians any differently than I would whites/blacks/Hispanics/everyone else.</p>
<p>And no, I did not live in a war-torn country. I lived in Los Angeles, in a modern sweatshop when my parents were new aliens to the USA. I did visit war-torn Asia many, many times though.</p>
<p>I know that in European, American, Hispanic, Asian, whatever other culture there is that are bound to be people who abuse their kids.</p>
<p>But I didn’t witness that firsthand. I hear about it. Hearing about it is a lot worse than actually going through it.</p>
<p>My parents were amazing parents. Who we lived with when I was younger, however, were not amazing. I have nightmares of marrying of those people and being killed, of having kids with those people and having them killed…</p>
<p>It’s not like I can control those nightmares.</p>
<p>So why do I have a preference for white guys? When I was younger, I moved to rural Oklahoma–nearly all white people. Some of my first friends were Native Americans and boys of German background. People who cared for me voluntarily. Their faces and familiarity became a trigger for comfort.</p>
<p>Is it fair? No. But everyone has a preference for one thing or another.</p>
<p>“It must have to do with a confining minority group. I dunno how numbered Asian people are in Florida, but living in Cali, I surely would not associate physical discipline (which I recieved often, deservingly) with my race.”</p>
<p>Yes, it was a confining minority group. We little band of refugee misfits, a group of malicious comrades whom my parents were saddled with.</p>
<p>That isn’t to say that I’ve grown out of a LOT of my fear. As I became more open to the world in general, I’ve met and loved many kind and wonderful Asians, like any other race. But still, my roots always come back to pull me down when I least expect it.</p>
<p>Effulgent, thanks for informing me of your circumstances. Had I known it, I would not have been as, let’s say, confrontational as I was.</p>
<p>Yet, for all your troubles which I sympathize with, things like abuse, hardship, and war are not endemic to Asia. Where I have most trouble understanding your reasoning is your refusal to differentiate between Asians and Asian-Americans. Attitudes in, say, Vietnam, are greatly different than those of Vietnamese-Americans who have been in America for generations. They may look the same (or they may not, since Vietnamese-Americans will almost certainly be stronger and taller than their war-torn counterparts back home), but attitudes are defined by environment, not race. If white Americans were kinder to you, then Asian Americans will also be kinder to you.</p>
<p>But you cannot hold a grudge against an entire group of people based on the actions of a select few: that is the essence of prejudice. And furthermore, don’t you think it prudent to explain why you glorify the white people so that oafs like me won’t come banging on your door, demanding an explanation?</p>
<p>This is the curse of being a minority I guess. When a white person is wronged by other whites, they learn to hate dishonest, unscrupulous, and selfish people. But when an Asian (or any other minority) is wronged by other Asians, they learn to hate their own race.</p>
<p>i’m korean and i date korean guys lol</p>
<p>Wait…I thought black women were suposed to be more attractive than black men.</p>
<p>Um no, black women are generally loud and annoying IMO. However, I feel that Asian women are quite *****y and are therefore unattractive. It just seems that they feel they deserve a guy who is in reality much more attractive than they are. They honestly need a reality check and some need to seriously look in the mirror. In contrast, white girls completely rock, especially intelligent ones. 1<3 sexy white girls lol!!!</p>
<p>Actually few Asian people in my school go for white guys. And I live in New York City where there are tons of Asians, lol. As for myself, I am Asian and am happy with my boyfriend of 2 years who is also ASIAN. </p>
<p>Edit: In response to evil<em>asian</em>dictator, I agree that many Asian girls are quite *****y but it’s all part of that trying to be “cool”. I know many white girls who are ditzy and just as many Asian/Hispanic/black girls who are also ditzy. What really gets to me is when people physically discriminate against certain races. I’m not saying that you’re doing that or anything, but I just hate it when people characterize Asians as having “small eyes” or “unhot”. Personally, I find Asian eyes to be fine and Asian guys to be sexy.</p>
<p>evil<em>asian</em>dictator:
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<p>Julina…he is stereotyping. evil<em>asian</em>dictator how do you find it so strange/wrong for asian guys to be stereotyped yet you do the same thing in your post? It makes no sense…You actively engage in something that you feel is unusual and wrong. To the last line in your post, can we say white fixation… I mean it sounds like the asian girls are totally justified in aiming higher than you…who wants to be with someone who thinks badly of them…the sentiments in your post make you seem ignorant and unattractive.</p>