Why Do You NOT Like Exercise???

Parent Cafe
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As you can probably tell from my first post in this thread, I am also a card-carrying member of “scarred for life by gym class” club. I actually got a couple B’s in gym in middle school before my PE teacher realized I was trying super hard, I was actually just THAT bad.

As for the environment thing, I am definitely having to work out of a lot of bad habits that I learned when I was a kid. My mom equated more love with more fatty food, and I learned to eat as a coping mechanism with a lot of difficult stuff that went on in my life (chaotic home life, merciless teasing at school, etc.). Also, we were poor and my parents knew nothing about nutrition so I grew up eating total garbage (think store brand cola and Ramen for dinner several nights a week). My dad worked a physical job (meat cutter) but when my mom came home from work, she would sit on the couch and refuse to move except to use the bathroom (we were expected to fetch her drinks and whatever else she wanted). I never lived with an adult who went to the gym, and we didn’t own any athletic equipment. This is a really big motivation for why I want to get fit and learn to live a healthy lifestyle. It’s been incredibly hard learning to value exercise, and learning to enjoy foods that as an adult I should already eat (like fresh fruits and vegetables, which I’ve only begun eating in the past year or so). It’s been tough having to deal with this, and the stigma and shame of being overweight, as well as working on my PhD and trying to get my adult life established. I never want my kids to go through this and I want to give them the tools from the very beginning to be healthy, well-adjusted adults.

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@hyperJulie , I can tell you’re on the right road for the right reasons with all the “wrong” things behind you and all your choices ahead of you. Good for you for taking the time, energy and brain space to figure out the balancing act of better health - even things as basic as “ramen and cola a healthy women do not make!!”

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Me, too.

Proposed: That everyone on here, no matter their activity level or lack thereof, recognize that everyone reacts differently to physical activity, and that those reactions may make it more or less enjoyable—and that any one individual’s experiences aren’t generalizable to what others will experience.

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This is an interesting thread. The psychology of behavior change as applied to exercise, fitness and developing a healthy lifestyle is a major component of any reputable training program for fitness professionals. It is a significant aspect of all entry level certification programs and is a subject of a multitude of continuing ed and advanced certification programs. The diverse comments and reflections in this thread demonstrate just how important this subject is if as a society we want to promote health, quality of life and reduced costs of medical care.

Most of the prevailing literature talks about 5 stages of readiness for behavioral change, based on the Transtheoretical Model of Behavior Change, applied to exercise and fitness. The first stage is Precontemplation in which a person is sedentary and not really considering an activity program. Engaging in an activity program is not viewed as relevant or important and is often viewed as not being practical. The next stage is Contemplation where a person is still inactive but is beginning to understand the importance of being active though not ready to commit to a program. The third stage is Preparation where there is a degree of sporadic, inconsistent activity but a person is ready to commit to a active lifestyle. The Fourth stage is the Action stage where a person engages in regular physical activity but has done so for less than 6 months. The final stage is Maintenance where there is regular physical activity that has been adhered to for more than 6 months.

Motivation and a sense of self-efficacy are important factors that impact on where a person falls in this model and how a person moves from one stage to the next. Motivation usually starts out as extrinsic i.e. a goal to achieve such as losing 5 pounds, lowering blood pressure, being able to fit into a smaller size of clothing and becomes intrinsic where a person is motivated by enjoying the activity or how it makes them feel good or provides a sense of gratification. Typically, a person ends up with a mixed bag of both types of motivations. Self-efficacy is a person’s sense of confidence or competence about making a change and plays an important role in promoting adherence to a fitness program.

Here’s a link to a pretty good article about all of this written from the perspective of helping qualified trainers assist clients in moving through these stages. It contains more info about each stage such as goals and tools that can be used to help a person progress. For those who have posted, where do you think you fit in this progression? What do you think could be done or would assist you in entering or advancing through the process of making physical activity a regular part of your life? https://www.acefitness.org/blog/3808/motivation-behavior-change-and-program-adherence

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I am the only one in my birth family who exercises. Parents don’t, though I think father would have if he were my age now. Brothers don’t either. Only me and my mom don’t have a weight problem.

In my family by marriage, everyone exercises. One child is a talented athlete and plays college sports. The other plays intra murals and recreational sports. Husband and I do what we can, time and age permitting.

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MK that is so, so interesting and seems so applicable to many CC’ers comments here- I feel I can see many posters here in these various stages.

Also interesting to me is a clear memory of when I felt really in control and finally confident in my fitness plan - it was 6 months after sincere “action” took place. Textbook!

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Interesting thread and, I don’t know why I haven’t thought about it this way before but several posters have said that, even though they don’t like to exercise, they just know they have to; it’s like paying bills or doing some other task that isn’t something one looks forward to but just knows they have no choice.

I have struggled my entire adult life with exercise because, well, I hate it. I’ve never felt the endorphins and have yet to find anything I really enjoy. To boot, no one in my family growing up exercised. Dh never exercises and, while my MIL used to swim years ago, she stopped about 15 years ago at age 70 (no judgement) and dh’s siblings don’t exercise either. Thus, without looking at it critically, it just seemed like an optional activity that I SHOULD do but didn’t have to.

My friends all exercise and, occasionally, I’m left behind. I also know I hope to be an active grandma some day and need to take care of my body. There was that 2 year period way back when when I went to jazzercise and that 9 month period when I did a particular weight/stretching regimen at home but I always stop. I’m out of town right now but, when I get back, I’m going to try to get into the mindset that it’s just something I have to do–a requirement. I walk with a friend 1-2 days a week about 3 miles but that’s it. In fact, I was visiting D3 at college for a parents’ weekend (missed my connection so I’m not quite home yet) and we all went to a dance show and all the moms talked about how out of shape we feel since the girls were all so limber, strong and coordinated. I was just thinking I really needed to start SOMETHING (yet) again. Really need to figure this out!

The other thing that made it a little easier to skip it is that I’m the right weight for my size. My diet is good and, if I gain at all, I stop eating anything with added sugar and I generally lose the few pounds I’ve gained. I do think I just went through menopause and my weight is up a bit. Nothing major but I’m wondering if just cutting the sugar out is going to continue to do the trick.

Thanks, abasket, for starting this thread. There’s a 15-20 minute walk/jog loop by my house and maybe I just have to convince myself that it’s mandatory that I do it 5 days/week, for example…and I could try to convince myself to get back to that 10 minute weight/body movement regimen too…it’s definitely the motivation factor for me.

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Interesting article, Michael - I would have to say I’m at the “maintenance” phase now. Burnout on the same types of exercise would have been a real factor for me if I hadn’t started doing Pilates at a new studio. I gained confidence in myself, met other women my age who were fit and not doing “Pilates light” and expanded out to Barre, TRX combo classes and more advanced Pilates mat and equipment work. I have to say I enjoy the studio work more than the maintenance running at this point!

My mother has never been an athlete and doesn’t eat well. My father was a great athlete - but honestly ridiculed me over my ineptness at sports. He played football and baseball - my sister played softball and while I don’t know that she was any good at it, he enjoyed working with her on her skills. My skill? The ability to catch the ball with my stomach! Dad exercised regularly until two years before his death - due to an extremely aggressive form of prostate cancer and the complications of treatment.

There are a lot of days I don’t want to exercise - today was one of them - but, you know - it’s on the schedule, so just do it.

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My H is a very avid exerciser and in great cardio shape. It is a major stress reliever for him. I can’t say it’s a huge stress reliever for me though. And only rarely have I had any kind of endorphin rush.

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For those just starting, walking is wonderful. But it can get boring, so try to find at least one thing you can add that’s different. I really love riding my bike. I’m not the one wearing racing clothes and peddling on a speed bike either. I ride a fairly upright step in model made for women. I’m still contemplating getting a better bike, but I didn’t want to spend a lot of money before I knew that this was something I’d really do regularly. I do ride it pretty vigorously, but usually never more than an hour at a time. When I started out, I went for 10 minutes in my neighborhood. Then after a few days, I went for 15 minutes. And increased it little by little.

If you can find something, anything, to add to a walking regime even one day a week, I think it increases your odds of sticking with it.

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One of my primary areas of interest as a trainer is the relevance and importance of regular exercise and physical activity for an aging population. Not too surprising as I approach 63 :). I think it’s important to consider that it’s not all about weight and appearance but about the quality of life we will lead as we get older, particularly given the increases in longevity that come from advances in medical care. There’s no question that a program of regular activity can stave off the diseases of aging; cardio-vascular disease, heart attacks, hypertension, respiratory disease, insulin resistance and metabolic syndrome, diabetes, arthritis. While medicine can treat and manage symptoms, regular activity can result in avoidance and enable us to continue to engage in activities of daily living with competence and self-sufficiency and to enjoy recreational activities and pursuits that bring us pleasure. I have many clients who as kids, teens and young adults had little involvement in structured physical activity but who now as part of an aging population are beginning to appreciate the role such activity will play in the quality of their lives going forward.

One of the things I think it is important to do is to identify what serves as barriers to getting involved in regular physical activity. This, of course, varies from person to person but there are many common themes. Work commitments, family, not knowing where to start or what to do, accessibility to facilities, finding an activity one can enjoy. Once barriers are identified, you can strategize how to remove or work around them. Getting involved in a regular regimen of activity does not need to be an excessively time consuming process. General guidelines are 150 minutes a week of moderate activity or 75 minutes a week of vigorous activity. There are recent studies and recommendations from mainstream organizations like the American Diabetes Association that even just getting up every 30 minutes from your desk and walking around for 5 minutes is more important to your general health than a structured exercise program. You don’t need elaborate equipment or expensive gym memberships. You’d be amazed at what you can do in your own home with just body weight exercises, your floor and common household furniture. A structured program of activity does not need to be exhausting (and certainly not painful) for you to derive the benefits of it. You don’t have to engage in traditional “exercises” but instead can participate in functional movement based exercises that complement your daily life and recreational activities. On its simpliest level, a structured program of activity is designed to enable you to keep you moving, maintain your strength and lean muscle tissue and to remain injury free. Whether you decide to join a gym, take classes, do it a home, engage in traditional exercising or combine your structured activity with recreational pursuits you enjoy, once you take the step of making the commitment to yourself, there’s a plethora of ways to maintain your health and fitness as you age. Sometimes the hardest part is swinging your legs out of bed, getting up off the sofa, putting your sneakers on and just taking that first step.

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Why I do NOT like to exercise: I simply do not prioritize it nor do I feel I want to give up the little free time I have to do so. When I finally get home after my 10-11 hour workday, feed the cat, start dinner, check my emails, eat, help clean up and then look at the clock, its usually just before 8 pm and all I want to do is sit down, maybe watch the boobtube or read a little. I start my day at 6 am when I get up and I do spend another 30 minutes online drinking coffee then before actually getting ready. I work at least a half day on Saturdays, but more often than not at least 6 or 7 hours. Then the weekly chores: grocery shopping, post office, you get the picture. Sundays in the summer are beach and cookouts, Sundays in the winter mean sleeping in until 7 or 8, hanging in jammies going online, late breakfast, either football or brunch/happy hour with friends, home by 7, bed at 10.

I do like to walk and enjoy hiking some of the trails around our area in the spring months. I hate cold weather and don’t like to spend time outside unless its 50 or warmer. I used to do all my own yardwork but now I"m married and my husband takes care of that (at least that was a couple of hours a week of exercise lol). I sporadically get involved in exercise-related activities but they never last. A few years back I did a couch to 5K program and in the last of nine weeks, pulled my calf muscle and limped around for weeks after. I never went back to it. I have a treadmill about five feet from where I am sitting, it gets turned on about every three months. I joined Zumba but I was terrible at it. I started Yoga a few months ago but it became a hassle trying to get out of work in time for the class (and everyone went out to dinner/drinks after anyways so the benefits were nil, although fun!, lol)

Yes, I could use exercise, both for health and fitness reasons. But right now, I can use the extra income more lol. Maybe when D graduates from college, I’ll work just one job, move someplace much warmer, spend loads of time outside walking and biking, take up tennis, and lose the extra #30 I struggle with every day. Really, I can’t even use work as an excuse. Even when I worked just one job, I used the two kids as my excuse lol. Figured I was running after them all day, cleaning the house and doing yardwork and that would keep me fit, yeah, not so much.

I really wish I liked to exercise :frowning: I think I"m lazy.

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I’ve been reading but great post @MichaelNKat!

I’ve been injured (stress fracture in my foot) and the weather here has been so terrible. I mean cold and it’s been snowing like every day, ugh! And I’ve been sick, the worst cold that just seemed to never quit.

I needed to rest my foot but I find that the longer I don’t exercise, the easier it is to not exercise. Inertia is real! It’s so hard to get off that couch and do something!

I used to not be much of an exerciser. I was busy! Work, kids, house, marriage. Then the kids left. So easier but still… I was busy,

Whelp, then my H was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. And had a heart attack. The heart attack had lots of reason, his disease, stress at work. But he was chubby.

Fast forward to now. H transferred jobs. Lost 50 pounds. Moved next to a golf course. And I guess because now I had more time (moved away from my comfortable job, friends etc), I became more active. I always was a walker, but decided to add walk/running to it. Rode my bike. Took up golfing. I am terrible at all 3. I am the girl who was picked last in gym class.

But now once in a while, my new friends refer to me as their athletic friend. If they only knew. Ha! And the H, told me I wasn’t the girl he married! And it was a compliment.

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Cannot express how much I hear honesty in your posts!

@collage1 , you said " I’m out of town right now but, when I get back, I’m going to try to get into the mindset that it’s just something I have to do–a requirement."- and when you get in that “maintenance” stage that Michael talks about, you find that when you are out of town you FIND A WAY to still get exercise in. Locate a park to walk in. Use the hotel exercise room. Do floor exercises in your room. Climb up and down some hotel staircases. I cannot think of a situation where I have been that I could not figure out “something” to do for a minimum of 20 minutes.

Some of the Fitbits now have a feature that allows you to track how many hours you moved at least 250 steps. 250 steps multiplied by 12 hours is only 3000 steps. It floors me that some people walk that little in a waking day’s time.

Anything is better than nothing for sure. “Anything” several times a week is even better!

Accountability IS the first step. Accountability to yourself and for yourself.

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I understand that many people hate to exercise. For those folks, I would at least suggest that you try to cut back on how much time you sit. Sitting is referred to as the “new smoking” as far as damage to your health. The fitness trackers are good to get you up and moving, but at least try to stand up more. I think it can make a big difference in your overall health. During commercials, get up and walk around the house. Go outside for a couple of minutes. Stand up at your work station if you can. I got a standing (adjustable) work station and it has allowed me to cut back on the butt-in-the-chair time considerably.

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Agree that the fitness trackers are a great tool for beginners on up. Just move! :slight_smile:

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@hilldweller, your experience with medical issues and injuries mirrors my own. I get it. Fortunately for me, my dh gets it, too. Other relatives do not. To complicate matters, I have trauma injuries which make it necessary for me to wear Depends whenever I leave home.

I’m also a charter member of the “gym class scarred me for life” club. PE is where I made my first C. I developed early and had PCOS, which didn’t help. As a teenager and young adult, just routine activities and diet kept me slim. That hasn’t worked for quite a while.

After taking Cipro years ago, I began to experience tendon problems, joint pain and weakness, etc. I’ve had multiple stress fractures in both feet. Several times I’ve had to use a wheelchair for a couple of months. I have chronic pain from old accident injuries, bone spurs, surgical mishaps, arthritis and bursitis. That tends to sap one’s energy.

Most of the time, I consider it to be a great day when I can manage routine tasks. Any exercises I do are of the sort folks would associate with very elderly people in an assisted living class. Wearing a Fitbit would be depressing. This week I’m using a knee scooter to get around the house and am just happy to have that option. At least at home I am currently independent and not a drain on dh.

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In 7th grade, my gym teacher stopped me in the hall. “I noticed you’re struggling with gymnastics. You know if you lost some weight, it would be easier for you. See how the girls who weigh less do better?”

That was the year we were required to do exercises on the uneven bars. I don’t even like getting a foot off the ground to skate or ski, so the idea of propelling my body around a high bar was terrifying. There was a small set of bars and a large one. I wanted to use the small set, but they said I was too tall and had to use the big one. I remember going into the equipment closet and just crying and crying.

I found that gym teacher on Facebook. Sometimes I think about writing her a little note!

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@silpat, certainly your limitations are legit and it sounds like you have come to appreciate what you can do, when you can do it. Conditions like yours certainly are in a class of their own - there is a difference between “just don’t want to” and “absolutely can’t”.

I do think it’s important to make your expectations tailored to your starting level and abilities. If you have never ran a mile, but want to start, you don’t start running a mile at a sprint. You start jogging for 30 seconds followed by a minute walk (or whatever). If haven’t ridden a bike in 30 years, ride around your cul de sac before you head out for a 10 mile loop at a local trail.

And if you get a Fitbit or other tracking device, wear it for a few days and see where your current step level is at. If over a period of 5 days your average 3000 steps a day, then maybe your first goal is to get to 4000 steps - a 25% increase. Fitbit talks about 10,000 steps a day - but does Fitbit know you?? No, YOU know you!

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That’s how I ended up with an eating disorder. Gym. The weigh-ins. The shaming. Not healthy.