It’s common knowledge that the kid with the car is the driver. It was the first thing I thought of when my son wanted to find a way to park his car at college. I said no. I’d still say no, and in fact, I don’t even think he should bring it next year as a sophomore. My D is 5 hours away in Maine and a senior. She’s never had a car on campus. She hasn’t had to get a bus home or even have us pick her up for breaks in the last 2.5 years.
If there is a health event that is so serious it merits getting your son off campus quickly, the triplets and you, with lupus, will not be picking him up anyway, right? You’re instate in NY. There are always going to be students driving home, there will be umpteen buses, and a college like Hamilton will ensure he gets home. Even if he chooses Oberlin, there will be plenty of ways to get back to NY easily.
The pandemic is going to end. Or there will be fast, readily available antibody/COVID19 testing, or a vaccine. Financially, the country will take a hit, but we aren’t going to need to prepare for the apocalypse. I sense that this is about you trying to mitigate anxiety for every worst case scenario. I think we are in the worst case scenario right now (barring an asteroid striking the earth) and you should assume that your son is going to be fine when he goes to college.