In our similar case my wife and I felt there was a mutual responsibility for a parent/child "sit down"and lay all the cards on the table. Parents and child both had good support for their positions, but we didn’t want either of us to be saying a year from now, “gee, I wish we would have thought of this or that.” We were going to require an open minded discussion and let him know that if he decided on a different direction than us (assuming he was sincere in the exercise) we would yield to his desires. We were going to be certain that each of us could recite the pros and cons of each possible decision. The economics of the whole adventure, quality of education, job prospects, and where the child feels best is are obviously all extremely important considerations. I realize that while this methodology was appropriate for our family, it may not work for others. Only your family can weigh all these factors and make the best decision. Just try to lay the groundwork for making it as much a shared, honest, and open process as possible. And pray.