<p>So… got my duke financial aid today. Not really much $$$ :(</p>
<p>33 minutes until Brown. It’s looking grim. Especially since I’ll have to cover 1/3 to 1/2 of the tuition if I choose to go there.</p>
<p>Duke is not known for good FA unfortunately. I know a lot of people that got $ 1-2 K which is almost an insult.</p>
<p>Yeah. That’s approx I got in Duke University Scholarships… and then there’s work study and loans. 26 minutes…</p>
<p>UVA might just be affordable / UMCP is looking better every minute.</p>
<p>And yet I’m willing to shoulder up to half the tuition to Brown along with Med/Grad school if it means attending the school of my dreams. (Yes, mercymom, no headaches with brown… just butterflies in the stomach)</p>
<p>Really cheers? In the cities I’ve lived in, NY, London and LA, I was always unusual being a full time working mom at our private schools.</p>
<p>Those numbers aren’t necessarily the full story though; if you realize you can’t afford a “need-only” school, you simply might not apply. I know several people who would’ve been outstanding candidates for admission to HYPS, but didn’t bother applying out of financial issues and chose the merit route instead. The FAFSA can be merciless.</p>
<p>On another note, for the reference of those who recently joined the thread and/or are about to face this very decision, here are some key questions that were drawn up earlier for students (read: students!) placed in this situation to help decide: </p>
<p>1) Does the student feel that he/she can be happy, proud, and fulfilled intellectually and academically or in any other way they find important, at the merit school? This fulfillment varies depending on the student, of course. </p>
<p>2) Is the difference in average quality between the two schools in what that student finds important be that student body, profs, research opps, salad bar whatever, drastic enough for the student to feel held back? i.e., would the student be comfortable seeking out the best professors at the merit school.</p>
<p>3) Is the student capable and happy to be near the top of the merit school in most classes? </p>
<p>4) Does the merit program/school provide additional opportunities for that student beyond the $$ like research opps, a particular EC, or simply a peer pool that the kid really likes?</p>
<p>5). In return for the exceptional perks, is the student willing to meet the expectations and demands outlined by the grantors of said perks? This includes the whole spectrum of obligations including GPA, “functions” and hosting prospies, expectations, major, etc. )</p>
<p>6) Is there is an added benefit the degree from the Top School might bring to that specific student’s interest?</p>
<p>7) How will the work-study requirements at the non-merit school affect the student? How will he/she deal with a limited budget?</p>
<p>8) Is the student the kind who likes to have a large variety of options and resources and can use them to his/her advantage? </p>
<p>binx posted a response on page 74 and I posted a response on page 78. Those who have recently joined the thread might be interested in going through these questions.</p>
<p>kirmum, that was my experience too when my kids were in a private school. In fact, the other moms not only worked either part-time or not at all, many of them also had nannies/babysitters AND cleaning ladies. </p>
<p>Eventually, I just gave up and sent my kids to publics. ;)</p>
<p>Things just got easier for me.</p>
<p>kirmum and katliamom- well, my experience at our PUBLIC school is that other moms didn’t work or worked in part time jobs. As a FT working mom, I was always a bit of lone ranger. Granted, this is a top public school in a well-to-do area.</p>
<p>I think the crack about female physicians is uncalled for. I know plenty of self-absorbed, narcissistic moms who only want to hear that their kid is perfect and their jobs range from aerobics instructor, owner of a high end pastry shop, school speech therapist, part time legal secretary, and yes, a physician along with several stay at home moms who seem to do nothing all day but complain about how busy they are.</p>
<p>So-- why the ire about the doc’s? And don’t male doctors have a responsibility to parent their kids???</p>
<p>fengshui -</p>
<p>when god closes a door he opens a window; you can still get out of the house thru an open window.</p>
<p>Yup :D</p>
<p>Waitlisted at brown. Can’t worry too much about it. I got the official full-ride notice from CP today, as well as my acceptances at Dartmouth and JHU (each offering around 12k). I cannot wait to visit UVA and Duke (and try and convince duke to give more money - does that really work?!) now.</p>
<p>CP is looking better but I’m not giving up hope on leaving the state 
Thanks for all the advice and support everybody!</p>
<p>Fengshui:</p>
<p>You do have great acceptances, though perhaps with not as much financial aid as you would like. Congratulations. </p>
<p>Do try to see if your financial aid packages can be increased. You never know. But UMCP is a great school, too, and as I said re: my S, once you’re in college, it does not really matter how close it is to home.</p>
<p>Thanks. It’s not really close to home as I just want a different environment. CP doesn’t feel like… the sort of school I want.</p>
<p>Blossom:</p>
<p>In re: post 1629:</p>
<p>I did not interpret Cheer’s post as a put-down on female physicians but as a reflection of the unpredictable as well as long hours that they must work. I know a couple of physicians who have opted to drastically reduce their working hours in order to care for their young kids. They just could not make the hours work with their family lives.
Of course, it’s not just physicians who have busy lives. One of my S’s friends returned to an empty home for intersession; her mom, a high level company executive, was on the road. Apparently, it is a very frequent occurence. But as a group, physicians do seem to have the most unpredictable hours.</p>
<p>I don’t know, the people I know who work the longest (and whose kids are orphans) work 2 or sometimes 3 minimum wage jobs. (For instance our security guard at work who waitresses nights and the cleaning ladies at school, one of whom is an aid at a nursing home and the other works at a day care center.)</p>
<p>
No, you misread my post, I was comparing Barnard to UC Santa Barbara: “if my daughter had chosen Santa Barbara over Barnard – less hours spent studying, more spent socializing or participating in EC’s, and a lot less pressure/worry about money.”
See above. I never said what Jack said I said. (I think he just read my post hurriedly - I obviously would have no clue as to how much your son studies vs. socializes.).</p>
<p>calmom: Actually, I read your post carefully (below):</p>
<p>"Eadad’s post pretty much states the difference I imagine for my daughter – his son’s Yale friends are more stressed, the UNC friends more relaxed. That’s pretty much how I imagine it would be if my daughter had chosen Santa Barbara over Barnard – less hours spent studying, more spent socializing or participating in EC’s . . . "</p>
<p>There’s really only one way to read that. I just thought a correction and clarification should be made. Less stress and a more relaxed atmosphere doesn’t necessarily mean “less studying.”</p>
<p>OK folks - if any of my helpful friends happen to be on you may remember me as the proud driver of a '97 mazda protege with 140k miles - 'nuf said about need for financial aid. Wonderful hardworking S has now been waitlisted at need-blind near-top LAC, given full scholarship at regional not-known private LAC, and gotten in at his favorite no one’s ever heard of it except people who read college books LAC - but he’d have to take out loans even with the nice scholarship he received. HARD DECISION. we are not capable of taking out parent loans due to health issues impacting our finances. Loans would be his. He is quite willing to work during school. My feeling - using Cur’s list - is that the difference between the two schools available isn’t great enough to consider the debt - but DS thinks the more “known” school has cachet. Hard to tell him outside of our region or grad schools, no one has heard of it.
So what do you guys think? Can the rubric be applied when we aren’t talking about elites?</p>
<p>
Why would this be difficult? If it’s true it should be considered (if I understand what you mean by cachet, and I believe I do) . If it MAY be true , well…I’d find out. </p>
<p>Yes the analysis remains the same IMO but , and this was never fleshed out to my satisfaction although I tried to get folks to talk about it, I think that it might be fairly common to think that cachet and differences in cachet may not count for as much between school 25 and 50 as opposed to school 1 and 25. Is their less of a tangible reputation benefit, alumni benefit, network benefit, connection benefit? And if so doesn’t that reduce the difference one might be willing to pay? Again, everyone gets to make their own determination of those factors and how to value them. And I didn’t say what rankings. I’m talking about any ranking system you’d like to use. Oh, and it ain’t my list. ;)</p>
<p>We’re old, kirmum. These are the new yummy mummy stats coming out–the thirty something moms. The primary schools our kids attended has tripled in cost–it’s $120K for JrK thru 6th. No multiply that by two, three or <em>choke</em> four kids and you see why the average mum is a working physician. You also see why private primary schools have so many single child families.</p>
<p>No offense intended toward female physicians–would apply to all 50 hour week working mums. These are trends that the teachers are seeing in private primary schools where the SAHM families are being shut out by cost. </p>
<p>It could be that working moms of our generation were more concientious because we were trying to meet SAHM standards. I’d say 60% of my son’s classmates had working mums–many of them academics.</p>
<p>orj…what kind of debt is he talking about for what kind of major?</p>