<p>Does anyone have any insight as to why a 21-year-old male would constantly lose cell phones, glasses, keys, wallet, etc. This is a kid who does extremely well academically, holds down summer internships successfully, high-functioning in most respects. But so absent minded. The losing things started sophomore year. We don’t replace the items. He either lives with the loss or replaces from his own funds. I think he needs a man purse.</p>
<p>“20 year old who loses things constantly”</p>
<p>Isn’t that redundant?:)</p>
<p>Do you mean things like passport (twice), drivers license, supplemental computer hard drive, mailbox key? Never lost a cellphone, just breaks those.</p>
<p>I have a D- 20 yrs old- who is the same way. She struggles to overcome this, but then when the absentmindedness kicks in- she will have 3-4 mishaps in a day. </p>
<p>She has lost passport, broken cellphones- lost a cell phone for a year and then found it in the library, misplaces/loses concert attire, you name it.</p>
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<p>No, he’d lose it.</p>
<p>(I lose everything all of the time, around my house. It’s frustrating but I don’t know that I can do anything about it.)</p>
<p>Eventually he will get tired of living without/paying for replacements and figure it out. That is what happened with my D. (Conversation with a friend when D was about 16).</p>
<p>D: “What do you mean, you don’t get an allowance? How do you pay for the things you lose?”</p>
<p>If you are losing stuff in your house/apartment, the only solution I know that works is to consciously train yourself to put your stuff down in the same spot every day. So when you walk in the house, your keys, phone, wallet, etc. get put in the magic spot right away, and then you know where they are.</p>
<p>Takes a little bit of discipline until it gets to be a habit.</p>
<p>For outside the house - I trained myself to do the “four pocket check” whenever I leave someplace. I quickly touch all four of my pants packets to make sure they all have their appropriate item (I always put the same item in the same pocket, I don’t know if this is normal or not). </p>
<p>After a while it becomes subconscious, it did for me anyway.</p>
<p>My D has taught her little bro the mantra “keys wallet phone.” Repeat endlessly. </p>
<p>It sometimes works.</p>
<p>Thanks, guys. Am thinking of suggesting contacts to him. He only needs glasses to drive and to see a distant blackboard. I think the glasses in the pocket are the straw the breaks the proverbial camel’s back. Contacts are disposable anyway these days so when he loses a pair no biggie.</p>
<p>The teens were nothing compared to parenting thru young adulthood.</p>
<p>D is now in grad school. Let’s see. Since she was a freshman, she has lost 3 cell phones, 1 purse, 3 sets of keys, countless notebooks, articles of clothing (don’t ask), 2 wallets, and one boyfriend. And this is just the stuff I know about.</p>
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<p>I could live with a 20 year old who constantly loses things…it’s the 50 year old husband who constantly loses things that gets to me. I swear we spend probably at least 30 minutes a day looking for his ‘misplaced’ items. :(</p>
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<p>Yep - that’s how I do it. Nothing magically about it. Just takes a little bit of discipline and order.</p>
<p>Have him work on remembering one thing at a time. I’ve been working with my child (high school rising junior) for ages and slowly , he improves. Cell phone/wallet/keys are now nearly always under control.</p>
<p>notrichenough’s methods (#7) work for old and young. Another suggestion - Take a picture after you put something down (I mean take a final look at it before you walk away).</p>
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<p>Yeah, momlive, I’ve got one of them, too.</p>
<p>I’m 17, and I used to lose things all the time. Almost every day I would misplace my cellphone, keys, wallet, etc. I usually found them at some point, but I did lose my old cellphone at the beach one time. I do not really have this problem anymore, but I think it’s normal for youth to not pay attention to where they place things. Actually, I’ve broken a lot more things than I’ve lost, but that’s another story.</p>
<p>Choosing the battles is also relevant. To me the glasses and driving are right at the top - compared to other misplaced items. Does he wear ONE belt daily - if so, and he can find that… maybe a belt holster would hold his glasses throughout the day, on and off. I realize there’s a dork factor. </p>
<p>Driving without misplaced glasses could be serious re: insurance in an accident. Perhaps he needs an extra pair that lives in his car, always. If it’s on his driver’s license that he needs corrected vision when driving, that’s really very important.</p>
<p>Contac lenses are a big help. I wear mine all day. He’ll see more people from afar, too, and probably like that. It actually makes me feel more connected and less in a fog when I’m wearing them, so it might help him overall. He just has to keep them clean but that’s gotten easier in recent years.</p>
<p>Full disclosure: in one of my kids’ Kindergarten classrooms I noticed 2 lost-and-found boxes; one for the entire class and the other with my kid’s name on it. Mortified!</p>
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I used this strategy for my prescription sunglasses (clip-ons don’t really work for me). I got two pairs, one for each car, and I just leave them in the car all the time. So no matter which car I wind up in, I have a pair available.</p>
<p>Music:</p>
<p>Has the boyfriend been found?</p>
<p>I keep prescript. sunglasses in my car all the time too. I use ones with old prescriptions for general wear around purposes. A cop once told me that if pulled over while driving without prescript. glasses (if you are restricted to wearing them while driving), it’s the same (ticket infraction) as driving without a license. </p>
<p>I have a 23 yr. old S who has constantly lost things since he was a young teenager. He lost a least one cell ph/yr. in college. He has lost his wallet at least 3 times…I don’t mean in the house…I mean lost forever out in the world somehwere. He’s lost all kinds of clothes. He’s locked himself out of his car a few times. Lost keys/cell phone in the house dozens of times. We nailed a key hook right by his bedroom door to try to get him in the habit of putting keys in the same place every time…didn’t work.
He’s lost an Ipod, a backpack with college textbooks inside. You name it, he’s lost it.
He’s a really smart guy and very organized, on top of all things job related.<br>
I think it has improved somewhat since college graduation but still don’t think he’s cured.</p>
<p>DH is uber-organized. S1’s penchant for losing things and leaving the house in a state of chaos just by walking thru, drives DH nuts!</p>
<p>No Tsdad—however, the new model(boyfriend 2.0) came out a couple of months after the boyfriend 1.0 went missing and now she is really happy.</p>