Our family is full of musicians. We wanted live performers…so yes, we are paying for them.
DJS around here aren’t cheap either!
40 days till D’s wedding. I think everything is taken care of. I-)
@calmom, it is perfectly possible to have a lovely wedding in a couple of months. Or less.
Congratulations!
Well DIL already has her wedding dress. and fortunately the ceremony can take place at her grandmother’s home/garden – so no need to scramble to find a venue.
Congrats, calmom!
Has anyone heard from @teriwtt lately?
@calmom, congratulations! I think short engagements are great. Best wishes to your family and hopes that they can make their logistical issues work in the best way possible for them.
As for music, our kids would have liked a band, but they were picky about the quality and the cost for the bands they liked was outrageous. We are in the NYC area and everything just seems more expensive. That 20 piece band will be amazing and having a close friend be part of it will make it even more special.
The invitations for my d’s mid-July wedding have arrived and I hope to finish assembling them tomorrow. We ordered them from minted.com, and I’m very pleased with the quality - much better than the save-the-dates we ordered from Shutterfly. I kind of wish we’d had minted do all the work and stuff/mail them, because it’s already taken me a couple of hours to insert the envelope liners and number the backs of the RSVP cards. And there are only 82 envelopes. Maybe I’m getting too old for this stuff.
I discovered two small errors. My own fault - I entered a first name and a house number incorrectly in the minted address book. We ordered some matching extra envelopes and I’ll try to approximate the invitation font on them. I can hand-address them too, if all else fails.
My daughter did mailed save-the-dates and invitations with on-line RSVP’s. This worked really well. She gave me admin powers for the RSVP list so if anyone said they had problems on-site either of us could take care of it. When we got closer to the date, it was really handy to have up to date information. We would have both been stressed out waiting for the mail each day.
We really want to do the RSVPs when the time comes…online. BUT we have two relatives who had issues with that. One used the Knot and the other used a different site. In both cases, all the guests were NOT listed and RSVPs couldn’t be made. For example, our DD got an invitiation…but couldn’t RSVP online. Turns out…neither could any of the other cousins. We called the groom and it all got straightened out…but really…it shouldn’t have happened!
What sites did you all use?
Our friends used Minted - the online RSVP worked like a charm. I am going to PM you.
My daughter used the knot. There were several people that had problems, but they either called or e-mailed one of us and we did it. I think we’re both type A’s so kind of liked having the control. 
The site we used allowed us to add people, and we did that fairly often because we were really unsure of how many out of state people would come so we probably invited at least 20 more people than were originally invited.
@walkinghome how did you do the additions since they would not have gotten save the date cards. We might be in the same position…need to get to an 85 person minimum. Lots of out of town guests. But we don’t want to offend anyone who didn’t get a save the date…or an invite in the original batch.
It’s hard to hide that your a second choice guest, if you are paying attention. My D recently got an invite for a wedding in San Diego (she’s in Providence, RI–groom is an old high school boyfriend with whom she’s remained friends.) She didn’t get a save the date and the invitation didn’t include a plus one (D has been living with her boyfriend for the last two years). D was mildly offended–not because she was in the B group but because she didn’t get a plus-one. She’s not going, but will send a gift.
Prince Harry isn’t getting a Plus 1 for Pippa’s wedding. Neither is groom’s brother. Pippa’s rule is you have to be engaged to get a plus 1, so no boyfriends, cousins, just friends as escorts.
I don’t think it’s a problem with a relatively small wedding like yours, as long as the add-on people are friends of the bride or groom. The bride and groom can complain that they were obliged to invite a lot of family members and couldn’t be sure how many friends they could include until they got the RSVPs from the obligatory relatives. This sort of implies that the B list was really the A list in the minds of the bride and groom. And this is probably the truth.
I can’t see being offended that you didn’t get a save-the-date. If you care for the couple, you make a free will decision. It’s their day, not yours. Not the time for a nose to go out of joint.
The bride and groom have ALL of their friends on the guest list…and plus ones. They have a nice circle of friends, but it’s not huge. Many of their friends are local and most will likely come. The out of town friends…maybe. But really…friends of the bride and groom won’t be filling in.
OTOH, we have a shorter parent friend list.
I think we will just let the chips fall as they fall. I’m not creating a B list…who will most definitely KNOW they are the B list. I think that is inconsiderate.
we’ll come, thumper, and help you get to 85. ;))
You know, there are still weddings without ‘save the date’ cards so how would anyone know they weren’t on the A list? I have never received a ‘save the date’ card but my daughter has received 2 (and then wasn’t invited to the wedding or at least never received an invitation).
I doubt very much if we’d send save the date cards if my daughters were getting married. We have so few relatives that a phone call would do, or in the Christmas card, or just though gossip. Groom’s families? They can do the work if they want to.
Save the Date cards seem to be another one of those newer wedding things that didn’t exist back in my wedding days. I definitely don’t think all people use them now. My nieces/nephews who’ve gotten married in the past 5-10 years did not.