@doschicos, my daughters paid/are paying for hair and makeup for themselves and their attendants. They consider it part of their gift to each attendant. Two of them completed the gift by buying not-expensive but very cute robes the attendants wore when getting ready, which made for nice photos. Not something everyone has to do, of course - just something fun for those who want to.
Thanks, @thumper and @frazzled1. I think your position makes a lot of sense. There are a lot of costs for those in the wedding party.
I’m realizing now how people spend so much on weddings once you start adding up all the extras. 
My former SIL works at a salon in a resort town where many weddings are held. She is often booked to do the hair of the bridal party and I’m not sure if she charges by the person or by the hour (probably about the same price) but will get $500 or more for her time, usually an entire morning or afternoon. She works in a salon where she rents her chair, so her schedule is her own to arrange, but she usually works every other weekend so a wedding could be an extra work day or replace an entire day. I think with 9 people you might need 2 stylists.
Hair and makeup will run $150 per person, but some are doing just one or the other. Thanks @frazzled1 for the lunch suggestion. The wedding isn’t till 4, so I would imagine they would need something before that.
Mimosas were popular in our group. Also fruit on skewers with a nice yogurt dip and pita with hummus. It’s really a fun time.
Our daughter actually picked and paid for her photographer. He cost about $1,500 and did a wonderful job. She was given a digital copy of all the pictures about three weeks after the wedding after editing. She had him come just 40 minutes before the wedding and he stayed for the first three hours of cocktail hour/reception. He took every single picture that we asked him to take with a smile and gave me a hug when he left. He even came up a week before the wedding to scout out a place for outdoor pictures. I’m not sure we could have gotten much better for a higher price.
I want to throw out there that my 2 DILs included me, the MOG, in the hair/makeup, mani/pedi plans. I was thrilled to be included and bought brunch for both groups. In both weddings, I think only the bride opted to have her makeup done and both brides paid for everyone’s hair and nails.
We also paid for the mani-pedi for the bridal party the day before including her MIL and the hair/makeup for the bridal party and me. Her chosen makeup artist brought 2 other people with her to help out while she spent all her time with my D who had a complicated up-do. We also paid her to stay until the pre-wedding photos (away from the venue) are done for any needed makeup and hair re-touch.
I let D and her groom pay for the photographer because they have expensive taste and it was around $10K 5 years ago. This photographer was flown out from SF to NYC to take another couple’s engagement photos and he took D’s too and only charged a smaller amount to pay for his expenses for an extra day.
DD is arranging professional make up for the bridal party - with July wedding, even w/o being outside much of any, want to look their best. DD2/MOH is very good with hair - but one bridesmaid is Black and so they will need to discuss her hair styling. They all know how their hair looks ‘best’. One gal has short hair and very simple.
@walkinghome sounds like you got a ‘dream’ of a photographer!
I took the engagement/Save the Date pics for S1. Got a local photographer for the wedding celebration – six hours, $1k. They were decent, but neither S1 nor DIL was particularly interested in posing for lots of pics. We got CDs of the pics, unedited. Albums, prints and editing pictures was additional.
My sister and I also had cameras, and we got a lot of shots of the entire week, as well as all the DIY stuff.
Quite a range of prices for photographers! My D has picked a photographer we all love based on her galleries. D and FSIL got along great with her and found that she is something of a geek and is really excited about their non-traditional wedding. The price is $3,300 which includes full wedding day (and they have the venue all day too, so it works out nice), second photographer for five hours, two hour engagement session, and everything is online. Editing is also included.
I hadn’t even thought about hair and make-up for everyone. Bleh. That has got to be expensive and I wouldn’t want any of the bridesmaids to have to pay. One of the bridesmaids is excellent with make-up. She is a dancer and known as the person you run to pre-show if anything is wrong with your make-up! I’ll have to think about hair though.
D and FSIL have birthdays four days apart so we celebrated both yesterday at a restaurant. This was the first time I’d seen FSIL’s Mom since the engagement. I’ve mentioned it before, but she is against the institution of marriage so there was no marriage talk! I’m hoping she can just view it as a big celebratory party. She is not discouraging them at all and she loves D – thinks she is perfect for her son. It’s just a bit odd!
I’ve been researching hair and makeup people for my daughter – who is not having a bridal party and therefore would be the only client (unless maybe the other mom and I want to have hair and makeup done, but I don’t think we would want to bother). I discovered that some vendors have a minimum, which you would never meet if only the bride is using their services.
So no matter what your situation, it’s complicated.
Just saw a big article in the newspaper today (from Lisa Bonos, The Washington Post) talking about the avg cost of heterosexual US weddings, $35,329 in 2016; 8% increase from $32,641 in 2015. Avg price for wedding dress in 2016, $1564; in 2014 was $1357.
The Knot did a study of 13,000 heterosexual couples who married in the US last year. The most expensive place to get hitched is Manhattan with the average wedding there costing $78,464. Most affordable was Arkansas, at an average of $19,522.
The survey found that, on average, a bride’s parents covered 44% of the overall wedding budget; the couple contribute 42% and the groom’s parents’ pay for 13 %. However, 10% of couples pay for their weddings entirely on their own.
The Knot’s 2016 survey also had an average of $582 spent on a cake.
We hit the avg for wedding dress/veil; they probably will hit the avg on the cake, with also having a groom’s cake. I believe in a cost saving measure, only the groom’s cake will be with goat’s milk, to save on costs (that way those guests who cannot digest cow’s milk - groom and a few of his relatives) can eat a bite of the bridal cake and eat plenty of groom’s cake. That is up to the couple. I know their wedding will hit well under the average - thankfully in part because they are in a cost friendly city and DD has a lot of good connections and ways to save; family catering company; friend doing the photos and video; etc.
This is being said by my son’s now mil. The average amount spent for a wedding here, in Los Angeles, is$106,000 dollars. I don’t know if this includes gown/photographer/venue…but that is the “average”.
The tragedy in this is that she felt that “our” wedding had to equal all her friends’ kids wedding. She paid for a few things…the DJ (and he stank) and a the centerpieces (which were truly beautiful). After the wedding she went to the newlyweds and demanded the checks that they received be signed over to her. She had gone into her IRA to pay for those things.
Don’t do this. Please.
Bevhills - WOW!
Wow, is right!!!
“The average amount spent for a wedding here, in Los Angeles, is$106,000 dollars.”
I’d be telling my kids to elope - seriously.
I feel sorry for your daughter, @bevhills, for having to deal with that mother-in-law.
Doschicos: I am the (dreaded I suppose) mother of the groom. The spendthrift is the mother of the bride. OK, I like the idea of elopement. But only if close family is invited. I want to celebrate…not to go broke.
Well, I saw the preferred location for the rehearsal dinner and though it’s not what I would have chosen, it’s what they want. Think large rectangular concrete room with glass garage doors opening onto a concrete courtyard with garden tables and decorative screening to the street. It’s the private space at a beer/food hall and the food will be provided by the food vendors, though all ordered in advanced and plattered as a buffet. I think it will be a fun, casual evening and a terrific way to begin the weekend.
Oops, sorry about the mistake, @bevhills. Feel bad for your son, then. And your daughter in law, as well. I hope she hasn’t inherited her mother’s lack of financial sense.