<p>My son was born at the end of Sept. so we waited that extra year to have him start school. It was the best decision we could have made for him. He is now a 7th grader, is a year ahead in math, has all As and is a wrestling and baseball star. We feel like we gave him a leg up.</p>
<p>DS has a late November birthday. When it came time for K the preschool woldntkeep him. Told me he was fully ready for K and the cut off was Dec. 1 so he went to K. did just fine, went to college across the country at 17, did just fine. He finished undergrad and has been working for two years before heading to law school this fall.<br>
So depends on the kid. Here in CA they are moving the age to Nov. 1 is year, Oct the following and Sept the following. I work at a school and am involved with K enrollment. parents are really squawking. They don’t want to pay for another year of preschool.</p>
<p>D2 has an early November birthday. She was born in California where the cutoff was Dec 1. Before entering 1st grade, we moved to Washington State where the cutoff was Sept 1st. She had already attended preschool and kindergarten. I convinced the Washington elementary school that she was prepared for 1st grade and should continue on the track she was on. Good thing I did, as we returned to California before she entered 7th grade. </p>
<p>Upon reflection I still have mixed feelings about making the decision to have her enter 1st grade when I could have had her repeat kindergarten. D2 is an athlete. Many of her peers are a full year older than her. They have had one extra year to develop their athletic skills. D2 would have been better at her sport if she had that extra year as well. That being said, she still is at an amazing college as a recruited athlete. So I guess I really have no reason to have this residual concern.</p>
<p>We have a Dec. 1 cutoff and I had a Dec. 5 kid that tested ready, but because he was my first I didn’t realize you couldn’t send them. He did fine waiting that year and I think for boys it doesn’t hurt to have an additional year of pre-school. S2 wasn’t toilet trained in time to start pre-school at 3 so he was an “old” kindergartner because I believed that 2 years of pre-school was important so he was an “older” boy. S3 was a spring baby…all was good to go for kindergarten but at the middle of first grade we realized he was dyslexic so we had to put together a plan for him that included keeping him with that “group” of kids for math and sciences, but hold him back until we could get him reading so he, too, is an “older” kid. With boys I think it’s all good. The boys were all mature and ready for college at 19 and I was totally ready and confident sending them off to college. The only downsize is they are the first to drive as sophomores and they end up driving all the other kids all over…but with that they have alot of driving miles under their belts when other kids haven’t even taken driver’s training. It’s a leap of faith.</p>
<p>My son’s birthday is October 29th, which happens to be my own birthday. When dinosaurs roamed the earth, my father lobbied for me to enter kindergarten at age 4,which I did, and I did well. He later was really enthusiastic about me skipping senior year of HS, which I did, so I wound up entering college at 16. And I did well. And I thought that these choices were great, until I had my own children.</p>
<p>My daughter was an August baby, and since she was my first and nobody ever suggested that I hold her back, we plunged ahead. She was been one of the youngest in her grade, and I will always wonder if, with her dreamy personality, would she have done better academically and socially if she’d waited. Of course, everything seems to be working out fine now that she’s discovered her strengths, but there were some sleepless nights for me over the years.</p>
<p>My son (remember,same birthday as me) seemed more in touch with the real world than dd. But I had a lovely talk with his preschool teacher, because the cutoff was originally 10/1 for our parochial school’s all day Kindergarten. She said that S had such a great personality, and such an original approach to life that it would be a shame to put his nose to the grindstone so early. As it turned out, I didn’t have a choice, because the cutoff was rolled back to 10/31, so he got the reprieve that his teacher thought he needed. And it’s worked out fine. I haven’t had the same sleepless nights that I had with dd, so maybe the whole thing wound up benefiting ME,ha ha.</p>
<p>And even though I got great grades in HS and college, sending me early did me no favors. My dad fought the guidance counselor like crazy, and I know dad meant well (dinosaurs were roaming the earth, remember) but I could have used some time to develop some genuine goals of my own. I think for most kids, the results of either holding back or pushing ahead aren’t actually disastrous, but we all want our children to have the best possible chance. There are many times that I wished that I could stop the clock and let my kids have a free couple of months to just be themselves.</p>
<p>Saw the piece tonight. I was cheering for the mom who was getting advice from every one to keep her kid back not to keep him back. </p>
<p>My son was late August b’day, cut off Nov. 30th. He was practically the only boy who had so “late” a birthday to be sent off the week after he turned five. No one who had a girl born before the cut off date held them back, so at least he wasn’t the youngest. But, tbh, I didn’t think it was fair that there were some kids who were 1 1/2 older than him in the same grade! Was he a bit immature - not for a 5 year old but absolutely, compared to almost 7 yr old’s.</p>
<p>I think the whole keeping your kid back is ridiculous, especially since most of them have been in pre-school since they were two, fgs.</p>
<p>I saw 60 minutes tonight too. We held our oldest back (born Aug, cut-off is Dec.31), because he simply wasn’t ready. No question. Not socially or academically. He was a premie and has Asperger’s & LD. DH resisted holding DS2 back. He has a Sept birthday, and DH didn’t want this to be a pattern. By 4th grade, it was so clear DS2 should have had an extra year that he repeated 4th grade. It was a hard year, but I’ll always regret I didn’t insist we do that earlier. We did not hold back DS3. He was simply more mature and ready for school by age 5.</p>
<p>Although they had no problems in maturity or readiness, SIL’s boys were held back for exactly the reasons mentioned in the show: she wanted her boys to have a every advantage possible, in the classroom and on the playing field. She pushed the idea that her boys were “LEADERS” in the class. It was nauseating. </p>
<p>Speaking as a third grade teacher: Please anyone, if you are a parent and reading this, do not do this without a reason. It is true that boys mature later than girls, and some are not ready for kindergarten when they are 5, but do not hold your kid back “just because…”</p>
<p>DS1 had a late November birthday with a Dec 1 cutoff. His preschool teacher told me the story of her son in a similar situation. She told me her biggest regret was putting him in as the youngest. She said academically all was well, but then adolescence rolled around and he was the last kid to enter puberty and felt absolutely miserable and out of place. She urged me to consider giving him the extra year. As he was the firstborn, we did. It was the right choice I think. He was in gifted programs, so challenged academically, but in terms of physical development and maturity he was with the right group of kids. </p>
<p>On the other hand, DS3 has an early September birthday and we let him be one of the youngest. He was always keeping up with three siblings, learned to read fluently at four and would have been bored out of his mind if he waited a year. He’s a senior now, very happy socially, a NMS, one of the top kids in his class and is really ready to go off to college. It would have been a huge mistake to have held him back.</p>
<p>^^I think your post just illustrates how individual and personal this choice is. Your kids will let you know what the right answer is, and “maturity” is usually the key.</p>
<p>HotCanary, my son shares my birthday, too! It’s July 14. As seems to be the case with lots of posters here, I kind of wish we’d both waited a year to start school. We did well academically, but we were awkward socially. He looked like a little boy on the track team in 9th grade (but he was fast, so it was fun watching him beat big guys!).</p>
<p>When my DDs were in middle school, I had to use a school generated phone list to contact all the parents in the grade, for some reason it showed birthdays, fully 1/3 of the class was old for their grade.</p>
<p>We knew two extremely focused athlete parents who red shirted their kids. The girl did great, a talented athlete, she went on to a blue chip university in her sport. The boy ended up too small for his sport.</p>
<p>It was interesting in our small town to see which kids were in the same school grade teams and which were in the same age groups in age-grade sports (like swimming.)</p>
<p>One of my kids has a November bday with a 12/31 cutoff. We redshirted for kindergarten, and at the end of the year, the principal recommended he go straight to 2nd grade. He was reading at a 6th-7th grade level and doing 5th grade math at the end of K.The advantage to the redshirt year was that things that had been attributed to immaturity were in fact sensory integration and ADD-inattentive issues. That time gave us the change to “unstring the spaghetti,” as our ped put it, and get some interventions in place.</p>
<p>The social stuff was tough throughout elem school because he was an unusual kiddo, but as the school placement situation improved, so did the social stuff. Hit puberty at the end of 8th grade (age 13), along with many of his classmates.</p>
<p>He still doesn’t drive.</p>
<p>My nephew was an 8/31 bday in a 9/1 cutoff district and the state insisted on K placement, over my SIL’s objections. Needless to say, he repeated kindergarten – and even as one of the oldest kids, was still the smallest in the class til 9th grade. Now he plays football, and while he is not terribly big, he is strong and tenacious (and made homecoming court this year!).</p>
<p>There’s one flaw in justifying holding kid’s back using Gladwell’s Outliers. Kids who skip ahead are identified as being bright and probably receive extra attention as a result despite being the youngest. Of course, that only applies to the kids at the top of their class.</p>
<p>Also, it’s not an advantage to be the tallest female in the room in terms of popularity.</p>
<p>I don’t have a major objection to starting K one year later, although I have seen it done more often for athletic rather than academic advantage. What I do object to is repeating K or 1st grade in public school to achieve the same effect, because it results in an extra year in the system at taxpayer expense.</p>
<p>Both kids are September babies. We lived in a September 1 cut-off state for child one and we abided by that. We lived in a December 31 state for child number two and did a maturity waiver. The kids were three years apart and we wanted them three years apart in school. We also were a military family and thought the kids should be in line with most of the country rather than just a few states.</p>
<p>DD was ready to go at the end of HS and has ever looked back.DS is still deciding whether he wants to fly to coop. Giving them both an extra year(I have never referred to it as holding them back) was the right choice for us.</p>
<p>For some reason I can’t see the referenced article. Is it saying that a significant number of parents are thinking of their kids athletic career at age 5?</p>
<p>Both kids born in January, not sure what the cut off was at the time - but it would have required ‘pushing the window’ to get them into kindergarten. Kept them both home for the extra year. We played in the mud, slept late, took trips, visited grandparents, stayed up late, went out in rain storms and got soaking wet and sat in front of the fireplace when we got home, went to the playground after visiting the bagel shop, and built a lot of sand castles. Petted ponies, dug for clams, took vacations during the off season - even at a later time pulled them out of school for ‘fun’ stuff. Saw most of the Harry Potter movies on opening afternoon, went boar hunting and crab fishing in season. Childhood is short, adult a very long expedition. </p>
<p>Just today I took a walk past our previous home. Hiked the streets and hills I took the kids and the dogs on when they were all ‘little’. Wouldn’t trade it for the world. DS - Junior in HS has an internship at at major research facility, DD - happy and content as a Sophomore in the perfect match college engaging in what looks like a career that will let her support her love of horses.</p>
<p>IMHO, it is not a matter of whether or not ‘they’ are ready for a structured educational environment, it’s why take that year of unfettered freedom and exploration, of sleeping late and taking naps on the grass, why shorten childhood? That year when they are 4 or 5 can not be ‘taken’ and then added on at a later date.</p>
<p>DS was a late december preemie. We are in a 9/30(?) cutoff state so he started with his usual cohorts. However, by late elementary school, he was bored and miserable, so he skipped 6th and moved up to middle school. Always the youngest in his grade after that.</p>
<p>Academically never had a problem in HS or college.</p>
<p>Socially, he was never mainstream and that would not have made any difference if he had stayed with his age mates. </p>
<p>Physically, he was/is low average size but is a college varsity athlete in a sport where size doesn’t matter. </p>
<p>DD, with a May birthday, is one of the youngest in her group of friends which I think is pretty ridiculous.</p>
<p>This reminds me of Lake Wobegon ‘where all the children are above average.’ With so many kids being ‘held back,’ it just moves the bar.</p>
<p>Interesting story. Our cutoff in California was Dec 2 and our oldest was born a few days later so we sent him to Kindergarten according to that cutoff. Our second was early November and we decided to hold him back a year. It’s funny the reasons they gave on 60 Minutes never crossed my mind when making the decision. I just knew that he was not ready and had him do an extra year of preschool. Our school district at the time was on a year round schedule so he would have started the year in July at 4 years old. I also really wanted him to be 18 when he went away to college (he’s a high school junior now). California is now changing the cutoff date to 9/1 which they will phase in over the next few years - this coming school year the date will be 11/1.</p>
<p>S was born ten days before the cutoff, and even though he’s in college, I still feel kind of stressed out about the ordeal we had sending him when he was 4. The preschool seriously disapproved. They really messed him up by separating him from his friends because they didn’t want to put him in the preK group. They would not buy that it was our decision and he would be going to K. This was partly because he did not want to spend another year at preschool (which he never liked that much) and never bonded with any of the younger kids. Also, he wanted to be at D’s school.</p>
<p>Anyway, so glad we did send him. For him, at least, it was good that he wasn’t the best at everything at first. He learned to persevere and was just more engaged than D, who was always ahead in everything. His work ethic served him well and he’s done great academically. Although he’s athletic he was never a star, and that may have been different if he weren’t so young, but we just don’t value athletics all that much. Now we’re both glad that we feel like he has a year to burn if he likes, and will still be on track.</p>
<p>I agree that 60 Minutes was a bit harsh about parents’ motives. The ones I know who redshirt are just worried about whether their kids are ready. I’ve never seen it as competitive, but I think it is sometimes a bit overprotective. But every family is different.</p>