A lack of Common sense?

Parent Cafe
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<p>I have noticed a common problem with some of the young people lately…and its just plain common sense and thinking and a huge dependency on technology, email, etc, with no clue as to all the problems that lie there in…I grew up and we were taught a basic letter format, a basic thank you card format, etc…</p>

<p>Oh I sent an email and they didn’t respond…do they hate me, did they get it, should I email again? why haven’t they responded? what should I do?
Isn’t Dear So and So too personal? How do I end a letter? Sincerely just sounds so formal, if I don’t know them is “thanks” okay? Do I need more stamps if it is heavier, i hate to waste the 10cents, but am worried it won’t make it…</p>

<p>Should I send a thank you note? I am not sure how to spot my interviewer, should I describe myself? Should I get there early? Would it be bad to bring a resume?</p>

<p>Parents, and schools, lets get back to some basic etiquette, some understanding of how things function, and teach our kids what to do…</p>

<p>Such as- you know, email is NOT 100% guaranteed…it can get blocked, thrown in junk mail., a TA or someone can be doing the Profs mail, the prof may check his email once in a awhile and email, can gosh, get deleted by mistake, or it can get missed…so figure out another way!!!</p>

<p>oh and my fave…the application won’t let me indent!!! what should i do?? I must INTEND!!!</p>

<p>Kids today need some basic formatting for business coorespondence skills, some learning that there are different correct but professional ways to do things, etc.</p>

<p>I know many do have that knowledge, but seems some really smart kids were never taught these things and it would be useful if they were.</p>

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<p>Off topic, but happy 5,000th post!</p>

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<p>I think that lots of times students turn to CC to get the answers to questions that their parents could answer if their parents were more educated, sophisticated or available.</p>

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<p>I know for a fact my son learned how to do a business letter in middle school, but it was in one ear and out the other. Until he needed one it didn’t stick. What surprises me a bit is there are hundreds of samples of business letters on line it’s much easier to look up the proper form now than it was in our day. I agree though they put too much faith on people getting and reading their e-mails.</p>

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<p>^Yup.</p>

<p>We were taught most of the things you just listed, CGM, but a lot of the kids just don’t listen. </p>

<p>And most of that stuff is pretty easy to figure out…I just go to the post office if I have a question, they’re very friendly where I live.</p>

<p>I think most of us have more “street smarts” than we do ettiquette, especially living where I do, in a rather large city (Long Beach, CA). We know what to do for a job interview and such, but the fact remains that we just don’t need the ettiquette as much. We don’t really have the dinner parties and such that you guys probably did growing up (and when we do they’re very informal).</p>

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<p>Mathmom My S must have been in your son’s class. I remember seeing him having to properly address an envelope and actually mail it to the teacher, but I think that is the only time he has ever had to actually mail anything.
Another thing that they no longer have to do is write checks. With debit cards and on line banking, I doubt it my S even knows how to fill one out.</p>

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<p>I think my son finally knows how to endorse a check and mail it in. But I swear both my kids ask me every time they actually have to mail something which corner the stamp goes in. :rolleyes:</p>

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<p>On the other hand, they seem to have been born knowing how to use ATMs, online banking, instant messaging, text messaging, and other technologies that are beyond me. I have trouble even extracting the voice mail messages from my cell phone.</p>

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<p>Mathmom, that’s too funny. That reminds me of the post where someone’s kid called mom to ask if you’re supposed to put the letter you want to mail in one of those blue things (mail boxes)…lol.</p>

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<p>Yes. I agree. I’m a kid though. But, I learned by teachers…burning it into me. Classes about business can be quite practical in the real world. Especially basic classes about formatting/typing/money.</p>

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<p>A great reason why doing everything for our kids and shielding them from chores, part-time jobs, and other ‘out and aboutness’ in the world might have its downsides. </p>

<p>Every week I see at least one ‘booksmart’ college student who really doesn’t know how to carry him/herself in the world. They can ace the midterm but not know how to cancel a meeting they’ve made with me, or follow up on a request, or know which hand to shake with, or to send a quick two worder saying something arrived okay or they appreciate the reference letter. I’m not talking manners (I’m not remotely formal), or kids with social skill deficits. I just mean sort of respectful or common sense/good practice things that are noticeable and make a difference. And I see kids at the other end of the spectrum that just blow me away with their ‘maturity’ on this dimension. I always hope my kids will be like the latter, but time will tell. </p>

<p>I can think of lots of reasons why kids have lost their sense of real mail, but some things, like how to write an email to someone in a position of authority, how to greet professionally, why sending thank yous is important, following up with individuals, isn’t classroom material so much as ‘out and about learning’ from experience. I honestly wonder sometimes if some kids are working so hard for the school stuff, they aren’t given a chance to get the various other experiences they need. </p>

<p>I think I’ll have better odds with my kids if I resist my hovering tendencies, and focus more on being a sideline adviser, not do-er (if it’s something they can do themselves). From as early as possible, get them to call to make an appointment or check on something or cancel something, send an email to X to inquire, seek out the teacher or coach to resolve a problem, and get the summer camp application filled out. Learning opp and confidence builder.</p>

<p>I saw an quote awhile back, probably under a ‘helicoptering’ thread about filing out apps. Someone, in justifying the heli-work they were doing, wrote their kid “was a great scientist, but not a secretary”. Well, I am a scientist and I so wanted to say “good luck to him then!” And wondered to myself why they believed their child the scientist would have lifelong immunity from such everyday nonsense, or when exactly he’d pick up these things.</p>