A must read 'laugh until you cry' story by Dave Barry

<p>I had mine a couple of years ago. Dave Barry is head-on about the MoviPrep (mine was a different brand; they come in orange, pineapple and unflavored, and all taste the way he described it and have the same results )(wish I had one of them fancy bathroonms like in the magazines; at least it would make the time a little more pleasant)</p>

<p>voter55, </p>

<p>About 4 years ago two dear friends were diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer within 6 months of each other. Neither of them had ever had a colonoscopy. Both were in their late fifties. One had a family history of the disease and watched her mother die from it several years earlier and STILL never had the test because she thought it would never happen to her.</p>

<p>One of these women passed away last year, 3 years after the surgery that we had believed was successful. The cancer had metastasized and it came back with a vengeance. </p>

<p>The other woman has been on weekly chemotherapy for 4 years for her inoperable liver mets. Her prognosis is uncertain, as the chemo drugs are no longer as effective as they were at the start of her treatment.</p>

<p>Please don’t be foolish. Don’t be afraid. Don’t be stubborn. Don’t be sorry. Have the test.</p>

<p>If ANYone in your family has had colon cancer, get screened before 50. I had my first colonoscopy 2 months ago (age 46). they removed 2 pre-cancerous tumors. I thank god I didn’t wait a few more years. Now I’m on the 3 year plan for future tests.</p>

<p>The prep wasn’t so bad and the procedure was a snap. My out of pocket cost was only $140. Well worth it.</p>

<p>voter55,
Have you had a baby? Yes? Please trust me on this: a colonoscopy is NOTHING! 1 childbirth=2000 colonoscopies. OK. There’s no comparison, really, so my equation is pretty lame. But, truly, the anticipation is far worse than the prep or the procedure.</p>

<p>Please excuse this presumption: if you don’t do it for yourself, shouldn’t you do this simple thing for the people who love you?</p>

<p>It is true that it’s nothing to having a baby. I had my first one (colonoscopy, not baby) about 5 years ago and the preparation, while unpleasant, wasn’t as bad as I feared. While I was checking in there was a tall strapping man who was telling the desk clerk that he felt so terrible that couldn’t even finish the prep! I felt very tough! </p>

<p>I actually woke briefly during the procedure - probably because the nurse had the same first name as me and the doctor must have called her by name. I looked at the monitor, thought, “huh - so that’s what I look like inside”, heard the doctor say something that seemed to involve something dangling, and fell back asleep. Everything was fine and I was good for 10 more years.</p>

<p>Thanks! Great story.
Been there, done that, but didn’t describe it to my friends as eloquently. </p>

<p>Having a colonoscopy is no big deal, you’ll wonder why you worried about ‘the procedure’.</p>

<p>Thank you for this thread…the prospect of this procedure has been haunting me for a few months. I am 48 but my internist recommended that I get it done this year instead of waiting until 50. I have been putting it off…until now. I will call for an appointment next week.</p>

<p>A tip:</p>

<p>When you drink the icky stuff, chill it first. Then chug it. Then follow up with chewing gum. (Chew it, don’t swallow it.) Makes the consumption of the stuff less obnoxious. The gum gets rid of the icky, salty after-taste.</p>

<p>Quite frankly, once the prep is over, the actual day of the procedure was rather pleasant. They put you out and when you wake up you’re all floaty. Then your spouse or good friend drives you home and you get to sleep the sleep of the angels for two or three hours. You wake up rested, refreshed, and feeling virtuous as all get out.</p>

<p>Anyone here have problems after the procedure with painful trapped air (gas)? My husband did and he found it the worst part of the entire procedure (and this is one of the things that has put me off of scheduling mine). He had bad chest pain (FROM GAS) for about 2 hours!</p>

<p>yes, had a bit of gas afterwards.</p>

<p>I had laproscopic (sp?) surgery to remove an ovary and get the other one cautherized (so I was ‘sterile’) and the post op gas was much worse from that.</p>

<p>Men are pain weenies :-)</p>

<p>I did not have the gas problem.</p>

<p>

Hell yeah. Those drugs were so good I was ready to sign up to do it all over again.</p>

<p>I, fortunately, had no memory of the procedure or the post-op discussion of the results. In fact, I don’t even remember DS driving me home! Thats’ the way to have a colonoscopy! HAs anyone had the “pill” prep instead of the liquid saltylemom-lime gross stuff that I had to choke down and it almost didnt stay down? How was the pill version? Easier?</p>

<p>Marion-
Do let us know how yor appeal goes. We had this discussion on another thread, and made the very same recommendations that VeryHappy and CountingDown are making. You will prevail. You just have to be persistent.</p>

<p>I don’t remember a thing about the procedure itself. I woke up feeling great and went out to lunch with my husband. And it was such a huge relief to have it done and I won’t have to dread the next one.</p>

<p>The prep is definitely the worst part. At our clinic we are told to use something different which is truly horrific. The second batch wasn’t quite as gagging as the first. The drugs are definitely lovely and “floaty” is a great word to describe them. And Marian I had the same unpleasant experience with the insurance coverage or lack thereof. As I recall one part of it was covered and the other wasn’t and my bill was about 1300.00 I just called and yelled at the billing office (didn’t try the insurance company) and they cut the bill in half so that I ended up paying about 600 dollars I think. Insurance companies who won’t cover colonoscopies are another example of extreme stupidity since imagine what they have to shell out for the cancer treatment if people are deterred from getting them because of the cost. </p>

<p>For Dave Barry fans, if you are a woman, DO NOT MISS his book about Guide to Guys. I read it on a family trip many years ago (10 I think) and when I would get to a particularly funny part, I would read it aloud from the back seat of the car and end up laughing so hard that I slipped to the floor of the car with tears streaming down my face. H and S were slightly less amused but I had a great time with that book.</p>

<p>The prep that my husband had to drink was not bad at all (per him). It was a powder that he had to dissolve in 2 liters of any clear liquid (he, at my suggestion, used lemonade crystal light. He said it just tasted like lemonade (no undertaste). He also had to take 4 dulcolax tablets (one every 15 min over the course of an hour).</p>

<p>I had that exact same prep. It wasn’t the taste that made it difficult. It was the fact that I could not drink 2 liters. It’s a lot more than it sounds like. The first few glasses were fine, but after that it was very hard to take it all in.</p>

<p>My prep was easier than those described previously. I had to dilute a small bottle of something in 8 or 16 ounces of water (don’t remember which, and it was terribly salty under the lemon flavor) and take a couple of pills. Really not that bad. Just don’t plan to do anything for about 8-10 hours after you take the stuff.</p>

<p>I was anxious because I thought the effects would be similar to having an intestinal ailment: cramps and all. Not so. No real discomfort, you just don’t want to be far from the bathroom.</p>

<p>I HATED the prep. Felt like I was being tortured after drinking a few glasses.
The procedure was easy but I had a weird experience. I was awake for it - not fully awake - but enough to hear everything my doc and his assistants said and also to see everything on the monitor. I heard him say “all clear” and “nothing to snip.” No pain at all though.
In the recovery room, I had about three other folks in the room who were completely knocked out. The nurse came in and said “oh, you’re awake already!” I said “I’ve BEEN awake” and told her I knew everything was OK. She said this was VERY rare - and that next time, I should tell the doc I needed more drugs. Good thing the doc didn’t say anything stupid during the procedure. Very weird.</p>

<p>The drugs commonly used are versed, an amnesiac and fentenyl (sp?) which is, I believe a sedating analgesic. I don’t think either one “knocks you out,” but they combine to make you very sleepy and not remember much.</p>

<p>perhaps someone who really knows can confirm!</p>