Adult ADD

Parent Cafe
1

<p>I’m convinced that I’ve been severely hampered by ADD since childhood, and I wonder if there are any adult CC’ers who feel they’re plagued the same thing. I feel like I live in a perpetual state of scatter (and this has been the case with me since time out of mind), and it seems that the older I get, the more it bothers me that I still can’t seem to get my *&^% in one sock. I’ve never actually been professionally assessed for the disorder, but, I’ve researched enough to know I’ve got it. If you have ADD, what do you do to circumvent its effects and live a productive and satisfied life? </p>

<p>Btw, I know there are some people who simply don’t believe there’s any such thing as ADD. If you fall into that category, I’ll thank you to keep your thoughts to yourself. I’m looking for help here, not dismissal.</p>

2

<p>I’m a psychologist who has worked with ADD kids and it took me years to realize I was ADD too. I’m sure of it now. All I’ve done is downsize what I expect of myself. If I couldn’t do that I’d consider meds.</p>

3

<p>Bethie - same here. Early in my career, I was doing a checklist with a parent and realized midway that if my mom had been filling it out about me, her responses would have clearly qualified me. I remember thinking, well I don’t know if this kid is ADD, but I sure am.</p>

<p>So, what do I do? Same as bethievt. I know multitasking doesn’t work for me. I try to simplify as much as possible. Any organizational system I devise for myself must be based on simplicity. I try to take time every couple of days to go over what I need to do in different categories and ask myself what I have forgotten. I really try to break things into small tasks - for example if I am going grocery shopping for a special occasion - I don’t add any other things I need to the list. Yes, it means two trips to the grocery store, but if I try to combine, then I will forget the very thing I need for a special occasion.</p>

<p>I now work with young adults and I also help my DH in his non-profit. If I have a report to finish, I set time goals for myself and don’t allow myself to check in on the internet - especially CC. It is the greatest threat to my productivity. </p>

<p>I love the phrase “downsize what I expect of me.” It is probably the key to being happy.</p>

4

<p>My H was diagnosed with ADD when he went to a psychiatrist for treatment of depression; he was in his mid-fifties. He started meds and stayed with the dr. for about a year until the dr. quit his practice to do post-doc work. He never found another dr. that he liked so has tried to muddle through on his own. After trial and error, he decided that name brand Ritalin works best for him which he takes when he needs to focus. His medical dr. writes the prescriptions.</p>

<p>Things that have helped: I have been seeing a psychologist for approx. 15 years since he can’t/won’t. Reading books so that I could understand what he was dealing with probably saved our marriage or kept me out of jail because I was close to killing him numerous times. The ADD definitely affected his relationship with our son who is constantly frustrated by his dad’s lack of attention (it has improved with age). H makes lists but needs help with setting priorities. Although he has major control and trust issues (I don’t know if that is part of his ADD or a by-product of having a mother with ADD), he is starting to listen to my logic in certain areas. </p>

<p>I get furious with people who try to deny ADD. My H wasted years with a psychologist who among other things sent him hundreds of miles away for some kind of trendy treatment for his chronic fatigue. The fatigue was caused by a brain that was continuously in motion trying to sort through all of the stimuli. On the surface, he appears very laid back but being married to him for 25 years, I know that he has extreme difficulty focusing.<br>
Good luck to you.</p>

5

<p>Look for this April 6th article “ADHD: Why More Adults Are Being Diagnosed” on WSJ.com.</p>

6

<p>I have been intrigued by a technique that appears to mimic accupunture - one “taps” on meridian points and it helps one focus. It’s called EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique. I have never tried it myself and there are You Tube videos on line. There are also books available on the technique. </p>

<p>You might want to give it a try - it might help you focus when you find yourself going off track. Good luck.</p>

7

<p>I was diagnosed with ADD about 10 years ago. I’ve tried meds, which helped me be more focused, but I don’t like to take meds. If, though, I’m attempting to do something for a job or around the house that requires a great deal of organization, I may take my meds (if I remember!). </p>

<p>In general, I like myself the way I am. ADD has many positive features including being able to rise quickly to any interesting occasion.</p>

8

<p>poetsheart, I’ve seen the effects of ADD in a couple of friends of my kids who go off thier meds during the summer. It is profound. There is such a difference, even in conversations about lunch or going to the pool, that it is like dealing with different people. These kids are not ADHD, just ADD, and they openly joke about it and have a good attitude, but they all feel they will need to be on medication when they grow up and get a job. fwiw.</p>

<p>I would recommend getting evaluated. There is no reason whatever for you to live with this if it is diminishing your life in any way. Solutions are available. My guess is that you are highly intelligent, which mitigates but does not in any way eliminate the symptoms.</p>

<p>Good luck. I hope you do pursue a solution. You’ve always seemed really great to me and it would be great for you to be able to pursue your future a little less encumbered by this, if it turns out to be the case.</p>

9

<p>I would also suggest that individuals with ADD take a look at dyspraxia. They have similar characteristics, but dyspraxia is not as well known as ADD.</p>

<p>Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe announced in 2008 that he was dyspraxic. The disorder is more widely recognized in the UK than the USA.</p>

10

<p>–*If you have ADD, what do you do to circumvent its effects and live a productive and satisfied life?</p>

<h2>Btw, I know there are some people who simply don’t believe there’s any such thing as ADD. If you fall into that category, I’ll thank you to keep your thoughts to yourself. I’m looking for help here, not dismissal."</h2>

<p>Hi Poetsheart,</p>

<p>Just like you, the people who say ADD is a myth has never lived with it! Good call to excuse anyone with counter-productive input.</p>

<p>ADHD has impacted me my entire life. As a young adult I was VERY impulsive and did not foresee the consequences of my actions…should have been dead 3 different times. I’m lucky that I’m still here. I also tried my best to become an alcoholic, but for the grace of God, there go I…</p>

<p>I was tested for postpartum depression in 1993 and scored for ADHD, also. At the time I was just concerned with feeding our baby and getting rid of mastitis! lol The psych gave me Rx for Prozac and Buspar. The Prozac lost effectiveness after about 9 months and I have been on Wellbutrin pretty much on-going since then.</p>

<p>Around the year 2000 or so I had wreaked enough havoc with our finances (forgot to write down debit card charges, $100-$400/month!) that I decided I needed to be evaluated “official” for ADHD. I passed/failed (however you want to look at it) with flying colors. There was a great sense of relief as it explained sooooo much of my life that I had blamed my self for. When I talk about ADHD, I use the phrase “I’m wired ADHD” because it is a more accurate depiction.</p>

<p>The book “You Mean I’m Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?!: The Classic Self-Help Book for Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder” by Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo was VERY validating for me. It seemed like they wrote it while looking in my windows! The reasons behind many of my personal qualities were very clear to me. I accepted myself much more after the diagnosis, turning the negative spin on my traits into positives.</p>

<p>Many times with ADDers there is a comorbid dx, mine are depression and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). When I was first diagnosed at 40-ish I started with Adderall XR along with a booster dose of Ritalin in the afternoon as the Adderall was tapering off. Bad idea as I had trouble sleeping. Now Adderall XR, Wellbutrin, Buspar, and Xanax in the AM, and Wellbutrin and Xanax at night. The Xanax also stopped my teeth grinding that had started TMJ symptoms. This cocktail of meds is monitored every 3 months or so. And to think, I hate taking medication, too! I equate it with needed glasses, so you wear glasses. And meds have not dulled the fun parts of my ADHD wiring. :-)</p>

<p>Something else that made my symptoms worse was menopause. I was early, and in retrospect that probably made my symptoms worse. Women in their 40’s may want to go to an OB-GYN for a hormone work-up. I’m on estrodial, testosterone cream (sense of well-being, not libido), as well as fish oil and vitamin D. Overall I feel good with my med mix, and am also exercising M-F, practicing mindfulness, conscious breathing to settle myself, and meditating.</p>

<p>After spending 49 years saying “I don’t do math”, I slayed that dragon at a community college’s adult learning center and earned a 92% in the class. It would have been about 98%, but I messed up big time on 2 tests…twice I failed to slow down long enough to read the directions! One of them had the formula right there! Go figure. lol ADHD is going to always be there for me and I harvest the good parts of it and have more self compassion for when I screw up with the bad parts. I still procrastinate, I have piles of clutter all over (not like on the TV shows though), have trouble sleeping because my mind is zooming all over the place. </p>

<p>This got really long (surprise!), but I would highly suggest going for official evaluation with a psych that you are comfortable with. The first one I had with my postpartum depression was not nearly as wonderful as the one I’m seeing since my ADHD dx. She happens to specialize in adolescent ADD/ADHD, but is a wonderful fit for me. If you are comfortable with your psych, you’ll work with him/her to find the right mix of meds and therapy, if that is what is right for you. Finding a good therapist is important, too. </p>

<p>Don’t be hard on yourself. When you are feeling like “there I go, messed up AGAIN!” just rephrase that to “There goes the ADD again!” and let it go. </p>

<p>Good Luck! You’ll feel much better!</p>

11

<p><- adhd here (along with AS :P)</p>

<p>say if i’m doing an essay or something, i’ll stop and go do something else for a while (go for a walk, or whatever) and then come back, i find it helps alot.</p>

12

<p>^My doctor told me that it helps to try not to force it when you can, because for someone with ADHD sometimes trying to be “self disciplined” and just forcing your way through it makes it even harder to focus, especially because you get frustrated. Taking a walk and coming back to a task is a really great suggestion.</p>

13

<p>My H and S both have ADD.</p>

<p>H was diagnosed later in life, too (of course.)</p>

<p>His solution is to drink lots of coffee and be married to an organized woman. Sounds facetious but it is not. He finds the coffee works as well as meds and doesn’t raise his blood pressure as much, as concern for him.</p>

<p>He has had his share of successes and some failures (ADD influenced for sure). Sometimes it is like living with pigpen. But he has good traits, too.</p>

14

<p>I am sure that I have it, although I have never been officially diagnosed. There is a list of adult ADD symptoms in Driven to Distraction, and it describes me pretty well. I discussed it with my internist, who was quite sympathetic. She asked me whether I wanted to be tested or just to try medication. I tried a very low dose of Concerta (18 mg/day), and it made a profound difference in many ways. The plan was to increase the dose gradually. I took 36 mg/day for two days and had pronounced chest tightness both days - very disconcerting (the pun I just noticed was not intended). The internist sent me to a cardiologist for a workup - medication discontinued, of course. I passed the tests with flying colors, but have been nervous about trying the medicine again.</p>

<p>Singersmom, a colleague of mine swears by EFT - not for ADD, as far as I know. He’s sent me videos on it, but I have not had a chance to look into it.</p>