I was at exercise class this morning and said something to a woman during the class. Her response was, “Shut up and exercise”. I was shocked. I couldn’t believe it, as she usually talks to those around her during the entire class. I am sure she has ADD, as I’ve seen many of her behaviors in my adult daugther. She is lucky I’m a little more sympathetic than most people because I recognize her condition. I expected her to apologize afterwards, but she didn’t. Any advice other than to avoid her in the future?
Was she just joking/trying to be funny/not being serious? Just throwing it out there…
She was serious. I even said, “I can’t believe YOU just said that to me.” She didn’t say anything.
What was your first comment?
Wow!
She has no filter. Who knows what she has, if anything.
It is amusing that she thinks it’s ok for her to talk whenever, but not others? I’ve seen that sort of thing with some ADHD folks.
Keep your distance from that one!
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as she usually talks to those around her during the entire class.
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I’m not as nice as you are. I’d wait till she said something in class and tell her, “uh, like you said to me…shut up and exercise.” (It’s sometimes important to “remind” these folks of their own words and then applying those exact words directly back at them. You don’t even have to use a “tone”…just calmly say it right back when appropriate…or better yet, have a pre-printed card and pass it to her. lol.)
Next class, stand next to her and start singing out loud. 
I think I was asking her how she lost so much weight, as I hadn’t seen her in a while. Even is she said, “I shut up and exercise”, it wouldn’t make sense, because she clearly doesn’t. Another woman overheard us, so maybe I should ask her if I understood correctly.
You might be right. I often wonder if they have no clue they said something offensive.
^
Sometimes, they don’t. They are “touchy” and their responses are “off the cuff” and with a “tone”.
I’m no expert, but my H and nearly his entire family has ADHD. ADHD folks can be “easily triggered,” they can talk a LOT, but will find others’ noise “jarring”, they can actually be “jarred” by normal “life’s hiccups”, they can be impulsive and they can be easily triggered.
I am not saying that her response was warranted, but she may have taken your question as a comment that drew attention to the fact that you thought she was overweight before.
Tbh.
In some circles, it’s rude to mention that you think someone is tired, over/underweight, over/under dressed, etc.
Don’t ask me to explain, I don’t understand what is rude about saying someone looks tired, because I thought that provided them an opportunity to share about what was going on in their life to cause that.
But now I know better.
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{cue evil laugh} Maybe she had “work” done to remove fat and didn’t want you calling attention to it? Who the heck knows about folks sometimes. I’d just keep my distance and socialize with folks who are friendly in the class.
I’m not sure why, but I can’t stop laughing. The whole scenario of someone saying “shut up and exercise” during a class makes me lose it. It must have been awkward.
Why is that ADHD?
I don’t think that the OP is saying that this lady’s nasty comment was necessarily proof of her having ADHD. I think she’s basing that on many observances that she’s had of this lady where the lady exhibited OTHER behaviors that resemble those of her own ADHD daughter.
I’m not really seeing that as ADHD. Maybe more asperger’s.
Or maybe she misheard you and thought you said something weird about her weight.
That was my guess too!
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maybe she misheard you and thought you said something weird about her weight.
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that may be true…but…if any of us are at the gym, and we think someone may have said something that is unflattering, do we say “shut up”? No. We pause and think, “hmm…maybe I misheard, this isn’t a person who has been rude to me before.” And, typically we say, “What?” or “Excuse me?” …in hopes that they will repeat whatever they said. We give people the “benefit of the doubt” when we have no history of “bad blood.”
I’m sure the OP doesn’t have a history of run-ins with this person. For the person to say, “shut up,” seems to say a lot about that person. It’s an over-reaction.
I agree, it was inappropriate.
Weird and just plain rude. She must’ve been in a bad mood or was sensitive about the comment about her weight for whatever reason–or thought you said something else. Maybe she is on something–or not on something she needs to be on? I would steer clear of her. If she is friendly to you later or apologizes, then, OK. I would really hesitate to stand near her or speak to her again. (In fact, I find these sorts of situations so awkward and unsettling, I’d probably go to the gym at a different time or even change gyms to avoid the discomfort!)
I don’t think it was ADD related. More likely she was just in a bad mood.
I never say, “Shut up” to anyone. My daughter occasionally makes remarks without thinking. That is why I believe I am more understanding. This woman is extremely hyper and often talks through half of the class, even when it appears that no one is listening to her. I guess I just needed to be reminded that she isn’t able to discern my talking from her talking. I like the exercise class, so will continue going, but just move to another area.