<p>Coffee- here’s what would work for me (YMMV)</p>
<p>Kid: Hey mom, I just volunteered to do make up for the local community theater production of “Phantom of the Opera”.
Mom: Wow, sounds like fun.</p>
<p>A month later-
Kid: Hey Mom, you won’t believe it, the director of phantom has a friend in NY who runs an awesome program for theatrical make up and he volunteered to introduce me.
Mom: Gee, sounds interesting.</p>
<p>A day later
Kid: Hey mom, I spoke to my director’s friend in NY that I told you about. The program in theatrical makeup sounds really interesting. I think I’m going to get an internship this summer doing stage makeup to see if I like it. I know with the money I’ve got saved from my job last summer that I can pay my own living expenses for a month-- if I need a loan for transportation to and from the city where the internship is, can I talk to you about that once I know for sure if I have the internship?
Me: sure, we can always talk.</p>
<p>A week later
Kid- Hey mom, I’ve applied to 12 different internships for the summer. I know it’s really competitive, so I’ve also put in my application at Sephora, Macy’s and Penny’s for their cosmetics departments… I figure if I can’t work on a movie set doing makeup, at least I’ll be learning about color and technique, plus earning some money.
Me- That shows a lot of foresight, great plan.</p>
<p>A year later- Mom, I’m one year away from finishing my BA. Based on my awesome summer, plus all the volunteer hours I’ve clocked working on 6 different theater productions, plus all the people I’ve met in the business, I think when I graduate I’m going to try and get some certification in stage makeup. I know those programs are very expensive-- so I may need to work for a year first to save up money. Do you think I can move home after I graduate so I can find a job here, save the money that would have gone to rent, and then eventually apply to one of these certification programs?</p>
<p>Mom- hey, you’ve shown such an interest and passion in the field- you’ve got internship experience, so many shows you’ve worked, you’ve really given it your best shot… and so why don’t you apply to a couple of programs and then we can sit down and figure out if we can help you with the financials?</p>
<p>My kids have changed career plans about a dozen times each along the way. What makes me sit up and listen- a plan. Demonstrated interest and experience in the field. Skin in the game (i.e. the kid is ready to move home or show a way to finance the venture that does not involve the parents). Conversations with lots of grownups (i.e. not just the person who wants their money, but real working adults who have been in the field during good years and bad. And shadowing, internships, on the ground experience doing not just the glamor stuff, but also the boring stuff. </p>
<p>We’ve helped our kids shift gears many times. But only with a plan per the above. Every time someone called to bellyache that they hated their major, wanted to drop out, needed a change, or had found some fabulous program in Key West or Aspen or Marbella and tuition was “only” X dollars and could we lend them the airfare, they got a polite, “Call me back when the Kool Aid has worn off”. And inevitably the Kool Aid wears off, and the kid comes up with an actual plan (or decides to back off under the glare of daylight).</p>
<p>I really understand how much you want to do this program. What I don’t understand is why you think you have enough facts to persuade your parents that you know anything about working in this field, let alone enough facts to warrant dropping out of a degree program.</p>