Alternatives to Venting

Parent Cafe
1

I have a difficult situation at work which will not change.

Rationally, I know it’s not about me, it’s about …, but I get frustrated and upset about it when I encounter this irksome behavior, and I need to vent.

The good thing about venting - a reasonable person confirms that you are not being unreasonable.

I always feel better afterwards.

However - it gets tiresome to hear the same old-same old story if you are the person receiving the venting.

What are some good alternatives to venting? What do you do to feel better when no one is available to listen to you vent?

2

I think exercise is a good alternative.

3

Same as Deborah, exercise, take a walk, bring a book for a break that is fun, plan for something outside of work, short term goals that have nothing to do with work, clean and reorganize your home, etc something physical is usually best. I do all these to deal with my work environment.

4

Thanks for the suggestions!

I do exercise every day, but it is in the morning before work.

I have a tendency to use exercise time to think about work, which is probably not that great an idea.

5

I enjoy taking a hot bath/shower when I’m stressed. I also love to just play guitar or listen to music and get really into that. It kind of makes you forget about time. Those activities can be really cathartic without ever really confronting the issue at hand and constantly having to dwell on it.

6

Knitting. I am not kidding. It really helped me calm my nerves during an especially stressful semester in college.

7

I could see that something like knitting would be good - you need to concentrate on what you are doing, and have the satisfaction of the project progressing under your control.

Music is a good suggestion, too - I think it has been clinically proven to lift one’s mood - what is your “go to” music to de-stress?

8

Isn’t there a thread for that???

If upset, writing out the issues can be cathartic, and I stop running through scenarios in my mind after they are on paper or computer.

9

I’d write a list on computer. Later I might organize it. I’d add something new to it if some outrageous thing happened.

Then I would relay episodes as tho doing a comedy routine. It got so my close friends would ask, “well, any updates?” Using humor was the key.

10

Fixing or improving something…maybe weed the garden or paint a room. Seriously, when you feel that “you’re in control and making SOMETHING better,” it’s like a relief from other stresses.

When a dear friend lost her husband in a tragic accident, we spent hours and hours weeding her back yard. Making the yard “right” was like therapy for her. Certainly it didn’t change the tragic circumstances, but it allowed her to have some feelings of “control” when her life seemed out of control.

11

My H would say audio books. Helps him shut his mind off about stressful situations.

12

I think it’s important to have a community outside your work environment, and one that works toward a shared goal is especially helpful. A volleyball team, a chorus, a photography class. I like sewing class (aka stitch and bitch) where you not only concentrate on making something, you talk with each other (cheaper than therapy!) and in the end you have something concrete to show for it (a pair of pants that fits, a quilt, a pair of boxer shorts.) All of which gives you a focus other than the thing that is stressing you, and provides new perspective.

13

Sorry, in the above post that’s supposed to be stitch and a word that rhymes with stitch that starts with B and means vent.

14

Might sound a little “off the wall” to some, but if something is really, really bothering me I go to one of the astronomy sites online and watch the videos of how small earth is compared to the totality of the universe. Just seems to put everything in perspective for me. So my little “problem” seems totally irrelevant when I consider that I am just one human being on one small planet that is not even a speck of sand in the totality of the universe. It helps me just let it go.

At the end of the day there is very little in this world that is worth your peace of mind.

15

What helped me survive an extremely stressful time at work was repeating to myself, “This is not my real life.” I knew it was only temporary, I knew the woman I worked for was crazy, and I knew that my real life was better than what I was experiencing at that moment.

16

Ah, Harvest moon, now we know where your lovely name comes from.

17

Thanks for all the suggestions - it makes me feel better just to know that others are finding ways to deal with similar struggles!

18

Deep breathing, meditation, prayer, daydreaming. . .if at home I like sweeping/vacuuming–probably that “thing I can control.” But usually I just vent. I could do more to cut down on the venting. . .

19

Play bridge. Great way to redirect thoughts, concentrate on something interesting and enjoy time with friends.

That said, venting can be very healthy- as great way to get something off you chest. we are here- vent away!

20

Cleaning and organizing things. Rearranging furniture , plants . Going on Pinterest and finding inspiration. Trying a challenging new recipe and` mastering it