<p>My brother and sis-in-law have asked me to care for their twin boys in their home. They’ve said they will pay whatever I ask for. My sis-in-law said she’s aware the going rates are between $10-15 an hour. </p>
<p>The logistics: 35 minute drive, including bridge toll, most likely 8hr day, 3 days a week, twins are 10 months old and my mom will be there to lend a hand, but she’s 77.</p>
<p>What would be a fair amount to ask for, since they’re family? It took them a long time to have these little guys and I agonized with them every step of the way. On the other hand, I was going to do childcare near my home anyway, and would’ve gotten the going rate.</p>
<p>Are they able to afford the standard rate? If you arent compensated adequately (handling twins is no easy task) you run the risk of developing resentment.</p>
<p>70 minutes commute + toll is expensive. The arrangement seems inefficient, why get someone from 35 minutes away to baby sit? Why not someone closer?</p>
<p>OMG, Vladenschlutte, she’s the kids’ aunt. The parents want the kids to be with their aunt. Human beings are not fungible. We’re not talking about workers in a widget factory. </p>
<p>If it’s important to them okay, but then they should expect to pay above the going rate. They’d be getting service above the “going service” if they value having family babysit. </p>
<p>I’d personally ask for $50/day+the going rate to account for the travel, so $170/day. </p>
<p>I don’t know why I engage in this, given how irritating it is but here goes: The parents value having the aunt instead of a stranger, and the aunt values being with her nieces/nephews instead of some stranger’s kids. That part is a wash. Your theory that the aunt should demand more because her brother loves her and therefore values her more is ridiculous!</p>
<p>If you said she should be compensated for travel time, that would be a better argument!</p>
<p>I would suggest a daily rate for your usual hours…say 8:30-5…or whatever it is. They pay by the day for any portion of the day that you rarified care to their kids. So if they come home at 1, you still get paid for the full day. Really, once you’ve gotten there, you have allocated the whole day.</p>
<p>THEN come up with an hourly surcharge rate for any hours beyond the contracted time. So after 5, they pay $15-20 per hour. It will help them realize that you have an end to your day.</p>
<p>I’ve seen it all, believe me. When our kids were in a home daycare, we paid by the day. There were many times I saw parents stroll into the provider at 7 in the evening…or later…because they figured they were paying by the day. I thought that was nervy! She eventually changed to an arrangement like the above one, except hers was a weekly charge. But the times were clearly stated. Any services beyond those hours were billed at a much higher hourly rate.</p>
<p>This is a huge responsibility…and you are commuting and paying tolls as well. I’m thinking $150 a day is not an unreasonable amount. Around here, you would be paying that amount per child!</p>
<p>It would be a wonderful arrangement if you could take care of your nephews. Why don’t you discuss the issues in detail with your brother and SIL? If you were doing child-care near where you live, would you be working 3 days or 5? Is it a problem that they only need you for 3 days? Tell them that because you need to work, and would be doing similar work in your area if it weren’t for these children, you need to make the going rate, and that the commuting time/tolls/gas/wear and tear on your car are expenses that you wouldn’t have if you worked near home. Have you thought about what will happen in bad weather? </p>
<p>They can absolutely afford the standard rate. I’m not privy to their financial status, but my brother is in his early 50s, sis-in-law in her late 40’s, both have been working since they got out of college, they hold no mortgage and have very little debt. I agree a daily rate would be a lot easier than calculating hours, gas and tolls. </p>
<p>Vladenschlutte, they would rather have family watch the twins than someone they don’t know. I was lucky enough to stay home with my boys, so I understand how important it is to have that peace of mind. I really don’t mind the travel and have the time since mine are away at college. I just feel guilty about being paid, but they insist I be compensated, since I was going to do childcare for another family closer to home anyway. I don’t want to get rich off my brother, which is why I can’t figure out a fair amount.</p>
<p>nottelling, thanks for explaining things for me!</p>
<p>Agree that there should be an agreement on overtime, when they need to work late or for any reason aren’t there to pick up at at the agreed end of the day. There should also be an agreement as to what days you will be working and what days you are off, whether there are any paid vacations, etc., just so there are no hard feelings. Best to set things up correctly instead of trying to change them once you get started–that would be more likely to engender bad feelings on both sides.</p>
<p>And remember…if they are paying you over a certain amount (which they WILL be doing), they really are supposed to contribute to FICA on your behalf. This isn’t optional for home employed folks earning above a certain amount.</p>
<p>In our state, anyone working over 20 hours a week for 3 weeks or more also has to be offered medical insurance from employer unless they sign a waiver and get coverage from somewhere else (in my case, from H’s insurance). That would be good to check as well.</p>
<p>Employers are also supposed to have worker’s comp, just in case the employee is injured for any reason. Even in our tiny non-profit with a savings account of only $20,000 and annual contributions far less we have worker’s comp and get waivers for anyone that might work 20 hours in any week. We also do contribute to FICA and withhold employee FICA and pay both to social security. Our bookkeeper makes sure we also do federal and state tax withholding as requested by employees.</p>
<p>OP, please don’t undervalue yourself. 10 years ago I paid a college-age babysitter $15/hr in a similar situation and I wouldn’t think of paying someone less than $20/hr now. Your brother is getting the added benefit of having a caring relative there; that is priceless. If it makes you feel better, price some of the local daycares in their area and you will realize that even $20/hr is not high for two infants.</p>
<p>I have a friend who does childcare, she gets $120 daily and that is cash under the table. Technically, yes, they are employers as Thumper says, but as family I think you could also gift your care and they can gift you the money.
If your travel is expensive, then add the costs of tolls etc.</p>
<p>One thing I would suggest is that you sit down with them and brainstorm things that can drive you crazy and decide before it happens how to handle those things. People do things differently and those differences can grate. Discipline, feeding, cleaning up, etc. can all be annoying. I knew a woman who was as rigid and controlling as can be and her nanny was very hippy loosey goosey, eventually they fired her over it, but this was after 5+ years. So & both women were driven crazy by the other’s style, neither was bad per se, I could see both sides of anything mentioned, but they just did not ‘get’ the other person.</p>
<p>So, think about things and talk it through before you are annoyed with each other. It’s their kids. but you will be there 8-10 hours so will feel propritory.</p>
<p>NYMomof2, if the weather is really bad like last winter, they either won’t go into work (having seniority gives them that option) or a cousin who lives close by will step in. My SIL will only be working 4 days and the cousin will babysit 1 day. That leaves me with 3 days. My mom lives there, so she’ll always be around, but again, she’s 77. </p>
<p>thumper1, would you happen to know how much that amount is?</p>
<p>The other issue is that by taking on caring for these twins, you are not able to do other work. Financially, you are giving up other options you could pursue or leisure time. How much do you need to be finanicially secure while you are NOT doing your other jobs? This one has a lot of intangible benefits but probably no pension, 401K, medical insurance, etc. It is a once-in-a-lifetime thing but be sure you will not make too high a financial sacrifice or you may come to resent it. It’s tougher if you ask for a low amount and then need to raise it because you figured out it is too low than if you try to come up with a reasonable amount in the first place.</p>
<p>Also, it’s unlikely the amount you get will ever increase, so keep that in mind when choosing the amount you plan to charge.</p>