<p>I am a refugee from the sixties and treasured the sexual freedom we had. And I had no difficulty settling down when the time came. I have had two husbands (not my choice – first one left but not because of reasons discussed. He didn’t think I earned enough money.)</p>
<p>Both my kids have been in long term relationships in the “hook-up” culture.</p>
<p>I think kids can really find what suits them, but I think an atmosphere that removes stigma is a good one. The hook-up scene at a school like Bowdoin (disclaimer have a kid at Williams, but I consider the environment very similar) doesn’t perturb me the way the scene at a school like Duke does. During the Lacrosse faux scandal there was a lot of ink about the girls throwing themselves at athletes for status. Yuk. Those shades of the sixties devalues women much more than any kind of hook-up or casual sex.</p>
<p>purplegirl – I hear what you’re saying and feel for the women you describe but that was certainly not my experience at all. Self-esteem and doing things for yourself and not to manipulate someone else or buy love is the key, I think. That and excellent education about safe sex, which I’m sure you provide.</p>
<p>I really treasure being a sixties person. It’s not something I ever want to recover from. Both my kids are more conservative than I was, and both have abstained from the hook up scene and done fine. On the other hand, they don’t judge their friends who feel differently.</p>
<p>PS D attended a women’s college and the hook-up scene was just as pronounced, which I hadn’t expected.</p>