Alh, part of what is behind my retirement is that there is more I want to do for both my mother, who has some issues that are complicated, and my MIL who has Alzheimer’s. I certainly agree caretakers are undervalued.
However, if one were to suggest that the ability of (many) SAHMs (and I’m not including those caring for a disabled child or similar) to redirect energies to community causes, public schools, etc is precisely because they have more TIME - then you’ve accused SAHMs of having more time than WMs and then it becomes another round of “but I work just as hard too!” and pretty soon it’s “I work 24/7 as a SAHM” as if parenting duties magically suspend themselves for WMs.
It’s not a competition. Do what works for your own family. No wars here.