<p>After doing extensive research (i.e., finding some Q&A on this subject on the Knot site), I agree that a gift, or at very least, a thank you note, should come from the bride–but as MOG, is there any way in the world I can make sure the bride knows this without seeming tacky, overbearing or [fill in your favorite unflattering adjective here]??</p>
<p>If she’s old enough to be getting married, won’t she know this already? I’m sure she’ll write thank you notes for any gifts she may receive at the shower. It only makes sense to extend the thanks to the people who organized and hosted the event. Do you think your future DIL wouldn’t be likely to write notes on her own? A gift is a lovely gesture, but I think the note is the important thing. Even if she is the first in her circle to be engaged, the need to acknowledge gifts is all over wedding planning sites and magazine articles.</p>
<p>I don’t think there’s a way for the MOG to make sure the bride knows that she should write thank yous or send flowers, etc., to someone who does something as lovely as throwing her a shower. The MOB could possibly get away with saying, “So, how are your thank-you notes coming?” without starting an argument. But not necessarily.</p>
<p>At my d’s shower this summer, I brought a bottle of wine for the hostess, just because I like to do that. My d sent her flowers the next day.</p>