<p>My son gets headaches whenever he is around cigarette smoke. This puts a damper on socializing, since, unfortunately, smoking is so prevalent among college students.</p>
<p>Short of gulping down Tylenol on a daily basis (not good for long-term liver health), does anyone have any suggestions?</p>
<p>Also, the suite he’s in is supposed to be smoke-free, but students have been smoking anyway. It’s a private housing co-op run by the students. He’s already said something to the membership coordinator, who basically shrugged. He’s hesitant to make a big deal out of it, because he just moved in and wants to make friends. I’m not sure what to suggest to him. He wouldn’t mind being around the smoke if it weren’t for the headaches.</p>
Really? I hadn’t noticed this at all. Of course, I’m only a parent; not on campus all the time, but DS has been to three different schools and that did not seem to be the situation at any of them.</p>
<p>The only thing I can suggest (besides Excedrin, which is not the ideal long term solution, obviously) is that this is something he needs to work with other residents on. He can’t be the only one that dislikes the smoke-filled environment. Or, if he is, then maybe he needs to choose different housing next time around. But, if there are a critical mass of students with his view, could they deal with it at a co-op meeting or however they self-govern?</p>
<p>I’m a bit shocked as well. I remember smoking being pretty rare on campus at UCLA…</p>
<p>Anyway, the best thing he can do is talk to people and hope for sympathetic ears. He has just as much of a right to live smoke free as the smokers have a right to smoke.</p>
<p>I can only suggest that some conversation within the school needs to be done. We are now so aware of the longterm health effects of secondhand smoke that it seems time this school (and others) implement the no smoking in buildings rule (as has been implemented in many places). It s widely known that for every 4 cigarettes a NON-smoker is around he/she “smokes” 1.</p>
<p>Well maybe ‘prevalent’ is the wrong choice of words. I didn’t mean that the majority of students smoke; I don’t know what percentage, but he says at the parties and even in the common room during the week, there are always a few people smoking. Sometimes there are other varieties of smoke mixed in, but it’s the cigarette smoke that gives him the headache.</p>
<p>I don’t want to be a ‘helicopter parent’ and since this is a private housing co-op, it’s really something he’ll have to handle, but I’d like to at least advise him. I’m concerned about him staying in his room to avoid the smoke, and miss out on social activities. He had to move in the middle of the year and this co-op has a very vibrant social atmosphere, very positive overall, and a lot of fun…but a certain amount of partying goes along with that. He doesn’t know many people yet and doesn’t want to appear whiney or too complaining…last semester he had to move because the roommate (the only non-student at a different co-op) was leaving the door open, brought in sanding equipment (wood dust not good for the computer or the lungs or the cat’s lungs), had weapons, and was selling drugs on a daily basis, with his customers frequenting the place, and quite open and blatant about it. Basically just complete disrespect for my son’s belongings, safety, and space. So my son already had a bad experience in which he had to report some bad behavior. He doesn’t want to get off on the wrong foot with these new people, who overall are really wonderful. They just…smoke.</p>
<p>So yes, he could bring it up at the meeting and that would be the proper recourse…but I don’t know if he will. I’m not sure how to advise him SOCIALLY - how to convince him that he won’t lose potential friends over this. He’s a little shell-shocked after that last experience, because when he reported the violations of his roommate, the other students mostly stuck up for the roommate, who had been there a few years. (Ha, easy for them to do that - he was in a cottage in back of the main house, all alone until my son moved in, so none of them had to deal with him!)</p>
<p>I want to convey to my son that this is an entirely new situation, with new people, and to not expect the same outcome as the last time. But he’s understandably concerned about fitting in and being accepted.</p>
<p>Is there any way he can change his habits and try to avoid smoky areas? It’s not an optimal solution, but he may want to consider new digs if possible. In the meantime, he should raise more of a ruckus. It’s only right that he get to breathe…</p>
<p>What school is this? This is potentially a big issue for my daughter who also becomes sick when around smoke. I realize there are smokers everywhere but she’d be much happier someplace where the rules were adhered to in terms of smoke free buildings. Have others experienced issues with this in terms of rules being ignored?</p>
<p>He has moved 3 times in the last 3 months. He really does NOT want to move again. This co-op is an absolutely awesome place in just about every way, except for this issue. And we didn’t even think it would be an issue - we made sure he was in the non-smoking suite. They’re not supposed to be smoking so it’s a violation he hadn’t anticipated having to deal with. I don’t want to send a message to him that every time there’s a problem, just move. He moved the last time because there were multiple problems and they didn’t get resolved by the management. He then moved to a temporary dorm, which got sold to a frat house so he was going to have to move again anyway, and then this other co-op opened up, and it was originally his first choice for many reasons, so he moved, with the understanding and hope that this will be his permanent residence for the rest of his college experience. He wants to stay there and work it out, and I agree that he should be able to work it out.</p>
<p>If people are smoking in areas that, according to the rules, are supposed to be smoke-free, he’s got to insist that the rules be followed.</p>
<p>No matter what lovely people these smokers seem to be, you never want to be living in a group housing situation where rules are not enforced. Who knows what imposition on his space is coming next?</p>
<p>Also, I don’t know what school you’re talking about, but at some schools, “private” housing co-ops are student organizations, just like clubs, and at others, certain off-campus private housing is officially approved or endorsed. Do you know for a fact that this co-op has no relationship to the school whatsoever?</p>
<p>Yes, I know for a fact that it has no relationship to the school whatsoever. It is truly a private co-op. I already talked to the head person in the main office and she said the way these issues are worked out is for him to take it up with the membership coordinator, which my son already did. Though, I’m not sure how insistent he was, since, as I said, he’s very conscious right now about trying to make friends and not give a negative impression.</p>
<p>Actually, UCLAri, I think your 4th option may be the best in this situation…I wonder if it’s possible to acclimate so he no longer has headaches? (I can’t believe I’m saying this, since I’m quite the health nut, but I’m weighing out the options.)</p>
<p>Aside from that, I’m really trying to get some ideas on how to guide him on the SOCIAL aspect - iow, HOW does he ‘make a ruckus’ without alienating himself from his future best friends? HOW does he insist that the rules be followed, without getting everyone mad at him? HOW does he tactfully bring it up?</p>
<p>When I lived in Japan, I found myself gradually getting used to cigarettes since everyone smokes everywhere. It took months, though, and I didn’t exactly ENJOY the process.</p>
<p>He may well acclimate. But I would think about what’s causing these headaches. I mean, is the smoke reducing the oxygen level in his blood? If so, what other body systems are being impacted without producing visible symptoms?</p>
<p>Well, UCLAri, that’s encouraging. So you just endured the headaches and then after awhile began to notice it didn’t bother you as much?</p>
<p>I wish there were some vitamin or something that could counteract it…there probably is, but I haven’t found it yet.</p>
<p>Come to think of it, I used to have headaches when I was around 19-20, and the doc told me they were sinus headaches. But now, thinking back, I was around cig smoke a LOT because my boyfriend smoked, so maybe that’s what it was. </p>
<p>And my hubby used to get horrible headaches at work before they outlawed smoking in the building.</p>
<p>Now, I get headaches around cig. smoke. Very low tolerance for it, and so I avoid it. I assume it’s from the toxins used in the processing. There are something like nearly 600 toxins in cigarettes…no kidding! So, as a health nut, I would rather he not be exposed to it, but hey, we’re all exposed to a variety of environmental toxins on a daily basis.</p>
<p>It’s not a great situation, but I also see his options as either bringing it up and potentially causing an issue or dealing with it (staying in his room or out of the house, dealing with the headache, or whatever else). Has he tried to just tell the guys that he gets headaches around smoke? He doesn’t need to make it into a huge to-do. I know people with asthma, and if they just tell the smokers that they have asthma the smokers always try not to smoke around them. If it’s done casually and calmly it shouldn’t be an issue. If the smokers don’t care that your son gets headaches and continue to do it in front of him, they don’t sound like a great group to live with anyway. </p>
<p>There are a lot of smokers at my college. I was very surprised by the number/percentage. There is no smoking inside dorms or buildings, though, so the only issue would be people smoking outside (sometimes gathered by a busy spot), certain areas in frats (sometimes there’s an unofficial “smoking room”), and other people’s apartments (and if you’re there, you’re probably a friend, and the smokers will step outside).</p>
<p>I don’t think so. I agree; he just needs to tell them and they’ll probably be very nice about it. Something so simple, but to him it’s a big deal. He’s probably fretting for nothing. He knows there will be smoking at the parties, but if he can at least not have smoking in his own suite, which is supposed to be non-smoking, that would help a lot.</p>
<p>well can he sit near an open window when he is in the common area? maybe a little pocket fan? </p>
<p>3 moves in 3 months is alot and I certainly wouldn’t want to make a 4th myself. He might have to just bear with it as it is better than where he was. little victories…</p>
<p>There are air filter machines. They aren’t perfect, but they help. They aren’t that expensive. Perhaps the young man could buy one and put it in the common area he frequents most with a sign or request asking folks to use it when they smoke. </p>
<p>Post a sign or ask folks who smoke to leave the windows open in a common area for a while when they leave to clear out smoke. </p>
<p>If anything in the common areas is washable–throw rugs, pillows, sofa slipcovers, etc. --wash it. It’s unlikely anyone will object and again you’ll cut down the concentration of smoke your S is exposed to. Vaccum rooms well for the same reason. </p>
<p>Wear washable clothing when he goes into common areas. Change out of it when he returns to his room and bag it in an air-tight container until he does laundry. One of the problems with being allergic is that when you continue to wear the sweater, etc., you wore when someone was smoking, you keep breathing it in long after you’ve left the common area. And you put it in your closet and then all your clothes absorb the odor. My kid’s frosh roommate never smoked in the room but the kids shared a closet and my kid’s clothes absorbed the smoke smell from roomie’s clothes. NOT pleasant. </p>
<p>Shower/shampoo after being in common areas for any length of time. Removes residue from skin. (I get headaches if I don’t shampoo my hair after being at my chain-smoker sister’s.) </p>
<p>If he wears contacts, use glasses in the common areas. It helps my kid. Eyes are less sensitive to smoke when wearing glasses than when wearing contacts. </p>
<p>Maybe he could bring these up at a meeting–say something along the lines of, “I get headaches from cigarette smoke,so I’ve bought an air filter for the common area. I’d appreciate it if you’d use it while you are smoking.” If he gets lucky, another kid will ask “Why is anyone smoking in X room anyway?” </p>