Anyone Longing for the Good Old Days

Parent Cafe
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<p>Lately I have been finding myself actively fighting the sentiment that the modern era, and many of the things that go with it, are hopefully just passing ‘fads’. When I have this sense of ‘longing for simpler times’ ( primarily, less intrusive technology, more politeness, a more private life, less consumerism, less fascination with flashy and fundamentally shallow people) I really have to catch myself. I know full well that time marches on and that as a person of ‘middle age’ it is a bit natural to feel as I do and I don’t want to let it all pass me by and not enjoy what is better because I am caught in the trap of thinking it is globally worse.</p>

<p>Is everyone else out there ‘gung-ho’? Am I the only one a bit homesick for time past?</p>

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<p>When I feel that way, I go to the beach. Something about the waves, the sounds, the expanse of water, the fact that you can’t be all flashy when you have sand in your pants… It makes me realize that the most wonderful experiences and feelings are simple, available, and free.</p>

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<p>In the good old days racism & sexism were rampant and accepted.</p>

<p>In the good old days, your odds of surviving cancer or even a car crash were considerably lower than now. </p>

<p>In the good old days, kids ate bologna sandwiches on white bread washed down with kool-aid and we called it a nutritious lunch</p>

<p>In the good old days, if you didn’t live in an urban, cosmopolitan setting, you had no access to good coffee, good newspapers, recent books</p>

<p>In the good old days there was no CC. Be honest – could you live without it? Or without google?</p>

<p>:)</p>

<p>Yes we’ve lost some privacy and are more technology-dependent. But we’ve gained so much, too!</p>

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<p>I read an article about this…it calculated how much time was consumed “in the old days” doing all the mundane tasks we now take for granted because of how easy/fast it is to do it…It looked at times back to the log cabin/westward ho days, then at various times along the way… when you look at it this way, I think I’m glad we are where we are. I do think we appreciate the access to information on the internet much more than our kids or anyone else after us will. I continue to be in awe that practically anything I ever want to know, I can find on the internet. Of course, English teachers today struggle to get kids to realize that just because it’s on the internet doesn’t mean it’s a reliable source. And that really, really good information can still be found in books.</p>

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<p>Have you watched any of those PBS shows where people attempt to live as pioneers and in the Victorian age? It seemed so nostalgic to them until they had to live it from day to day and live without our modern conveniences like running water, electricity, phones, TV, internet, etc. and had to expend a lot of work just to be able to eat and drink.</p>

<p>I understand what you’re feeling though.</p>

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<p>I know exactly what you mean, anitaw. While I appreciate the way “progress” has improved my life, I am constantly annoyed by the intrusions of modern technology; specifically cell phones. I can’t go anywhere without being forced to listen to multiple, very loud conversations, from the grocery store to the tops of the Dolomites in northern Italy. There is simply no place to go to get away from it. I only wish I had a beach closer than 1500 miles away from my home, although the cell phones are there too. There is simply too much noise these days. Another pet peeve of mine is leafblowers–what is wrong with a rake?</p>

<p>I feel better having ranted!</p>

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<p>The thing is, do we need to live with the negative things Anitaw decries in order to enjoy the positive gains Katlia lists? Is a national obsession with glitz and shallowness connected in any way with progress in overcoming racism and sexism, for instance? I think we all agree that no, the first is certainly not in any way predicated by the second.</p>

<p>So, I agree, Anitaw, there is a lot in present day society that I think detracts from a more thoughtful, engaged, mindful society. At least I feel that personally, anyway. My H and I have been trying to consciously simplfy our lives to have more time for what is, for us, more important. </p>

<p>I also think that, sure, pioneer life was difficult, but that does not automatically mean that ALL of our new conveniences actually make life better. The wealth of gadgets which seem like Standard Operating Procedure in modern life require a real wealth of income to acquire them–which means more working, less enjoying.</p>

<p>I think it would be possible to take our real progress and combine it with a conscious simplifying and end up with a more satisfactory life, if that’s what we are looking for (and I am!)</p>

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<p>Nope, I’m with you. </p>

<p>I have stopped watching television. It hasn’t been on in weeks. It helps. I turn my car radio to my favorite classical station. My cell phone is off, until I need it for a specific purpose. I’ve discontinued the newspaper. I get the news from my laptop once a day and try not to let the nastiness and insanity that is taking place ruin my day.</p>

<p>I spend more time at home. I’ve put more energy into cooking, gardening, improving our living space, and spending time with friends and the people who depend on me. </p>

<p>We can’t turn back the clock, but we can limit what comes into our lives. I know, I sound like a provincial old fool, but I am a more peaceful one than I was before I made some of these conscious changes.</p>

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<p>Wait 20 years and the times of today will be “the good old days.”</p>

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<p>In the old days, there wasn’t any air conditioning. Or disposable diapers. Or DVDs. Or knee replacement surgeries (something I will be needing in a few years, so it’s fairly important to me).</p>

<p>There was still plenty of rudeness, though, including varieties that we now think of as unacceptable prejudice.</p>

<p>I’ll take now over then, thank you.</p>

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<p>The “modern” things many people gripe about (me too, occasionally) are often avoidable. You can get rid of the cell phone or the tv, dump the superficial friends, and with a minimum of effort find quiet, deserted beaches and mountains. </p>

<p>Personally, I’d still rather worry about my child becoming materialistic or electronically-dependent – than worry about her getting polio, for example.</p>

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<p>I’m reminded of when I lived in Miami – there it is very common to find certain types of middle-aged or older Cuban exile men who sit by the hour and long for the good old days back in Cuba - where the women were prettier, the bananas were better, the sky was bluer, etc. etc.</p>

<p>Similarly, we are all exiles from our own youth. We long to go back to when everyone was better looking and better mannered, and the food tasted better, etc.</p>

<p>In the Cro Magnon period there were no doubt people longing for the good ol’ Neanderthal days.</p>

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<p>The idea of the passed “Golden Age” is as old as Hesiod, which I guess means almost 3,000 years.</p>

<p>In point of fact, we now spend more time on chores than our ancestors. Cleaning the rug was a twice a year hang out the window and bang and bang. While that may have been time consuming, it doesn’t compare to daily vacuuming. Our standards have risen so precipitously that we now have less leisure than at any point in human history. After all, foraging societies did nothing but walk and eat, with occasional hunting thrown in.</p>

<p>That said, I never want to go back. Any time in the last 10,000 years is sexist, and we are moving past that.</p>

<p>I second the air conditioning and add contact lenses.</p>

<p>I also enjoy the obstetrical knowledge we have as well as a thorough understanding of the germ theory. I am grateful I did not really worry about dying in childbirth.</p>

<p>But most of all, I enjoy our choices. My mother decries choice and sees it as a negative thing, that we get lost in our choices. I disagree.</p>

<p>I could never have been a wifey. I have my own name, bank account, car, pension, career. That would have been unthinkable at most times in history. I have a PhD. How many women before our era could say that? I spend my life teaching literature in college, doing exactly what I love. Also thank the modern era.</p>

<p>Oh, and while I’m at it, I’m also going to thank the modern era for all the sexual experimentation I’ve been able to do without being exiled from “all polite society” as Jane Austen says in Mansfield Park.</p>

<p>And, as I’m in an impish mood, than the modern era for movies (I adore them) and on a night I’m tired: TV, yes even TV. Oh, I will thank my cell phone that makes driving at night and riding in elevators that tend to get stuck a lot less scary. And the cell with a family plan so DD can call every day if she feels like it (she does) and so can DS if he feels like it (he doesn’t.)</p>

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<p>I just want some ice cream made with a handcrank and rock salt…and I want to be able to drive my son to school at 7 a.m. without hearing a commercial for a sitcom that goes… <canned laughter=“”>“The woman can’t get pregant if she’s on top…laws of gravity!” <canned laughter=“”>.</canned></canned></p>

<p>Nothing wrong with that right??</p>

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<p>I’d still get rid of all video, computer, and similar games. Every plave I go including some nice senic spots, fine restaurants, sporting events I see scores of young mostly boys with their head buried in some handheld video game. I am OFTEN tempted to grab and smash them to smithereeens (the games of course). Get into the reality moment–not some game.</p>

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<p>I hear you, ldmom06, but you can make that ice cream anytime you want and you can listen to a cd or to a noncommercial radio station - and at least those two things are taken care of!</p>

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<p>Well, as I said before, these kinds of discussions always devolve into ‘well, I’d miss, such and such and so and so’ ,but I’d love it if we could evolve our culture to keep what’s worth keeping, and stop saturating the world around us with so much dross. And, even with a lot of concerted effort, it’s hard to avoid it (though I do try.)</p>

<p>MM–your housekeeping comment is well-taken and i agree with it completely, but again, do we need to go back to the bad old sexist times, to realize that our modern routines are needlessly time-destroying? I don’t think so.</p>

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<p>welll…that wasn’t my point…momfromme…lol! But you are right! :slight_smile: I’ll just have to squeeze the leisurely fun of cranking ice cream into our overbooked life. But come on…when you can’t even listen to the oldies station…sigh.</p>

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<p>Not me. I’ve solved that problem by vacuuming the carpet only twice a year. I have the benefits of both eras.</p>

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<p>Nothing new or particularly modern about that. You could make exactly the same complaint about books.</p>

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<p>Set your radio on NPR and buy a hand-crank ice cream maker on E-bay.</p>

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<p>Yeah, I’ve sort of stopped cleaning too. The house just gets dirty again. Am I to spend every waking hour moving things around?</p>