<p>Ok, so I had to do a satire essay for AP lang, and we had to read them out loud… sucks big time. i effin hate public speaking… i don’t know, i don’t think anybody liked my essay. Read it and let me hear what you think? </p>
<p>Can we live without marriage? As divorce rates begin to grow in today’s society, both unmarried couples and single people now find the institution of marriage as “obsolete” and “meaningless”. But honestly, marriage can cause a lot of stress for both partners, which can lead to separation and divorce. Some people force, pressure, or rush others to get married; others rush into marriage on their own will as opposed to taking it slow and handling the issue of marriage more carefully. People, including myself, feel tired of stressing over weddings, facing our nasty in-laws, having martial arguments at night, and hearing and reading about crazy divorce stories on television and in the magazines among ridiculous Hollywood couples. Since most Americans plan to give up on marriage due its insignificance, you should start too! Why not ban marriage altogether? Gay couples even find marriage pointless.</p>
<p>Apparently, marriage has become nothing more than just a piece of paper. Seriously, we do not need the federal government to recognize a couple’s love nor force the couple to register for a license to seal their commitment to one another. Do you not find that useless? People should just throw away all those legal benefits, rights, and responsibilities because they simply don’t matter anymore, despite the fact that you cannot have immigration benefits and other 1,400 rights and privileges that covers health care, parenting, immigration and taxation. Since you cannot make hospital visitations, just try to avoid getting sick or injured. But, seriously, who really wants to see their sick partner at the hospital anyways? You do not want to get sick yourself by contracting the illness from your partner at the hospital room, or see your partner in pain. The lack of marriages also helps the economy since unmarried couples pay MORE money than married couples, especially on taxes (since married couples get the benefits of tax deductions, car insurance will cost much cheaper for them, etc). The ban on marriage will help the better the lives of people financially. </p>
<p>People also need to realize that giving birth out of wedlock and starting a family does not harm your children or cause instability in your family. Despite studies showing that illegitimate children will most likely live in poverty due to a drop in income after separation and the absence of those good child benefits offered in marriage, single women can still try to change those consequences. If single mothers find it hard to raise their child because they do not have the time or money, they can work as hairdressers or waitresses, file for welfare and keep chasing their ex-boyfriends for child support. I know a woman who has done this before and she lives a decent life now. Children can still good stable lives even if their fathers can easily walk off and leave out of the family. Although illegitimate children have higher chances of never seeing their biological fathers again after separation, the lives of both child and mother can still succeed. Single mothers should denounce their ex-boyfriends as “idiots” for leaving them in the first place; therefore, never having the chance to them is always a good thing for her and her baby. Why do people think that a child always needs its mother and father?</p>
<p>Most importantly, nobody wants to get married and bore their life to death by sticking to one person for the rest of their lives. Instead, a better life should come with the benefits of flirting and sleeping around with as many people as you want without getting into legal trouble. Again, this type of a better life can only happen at a time when no marriage exists between you or anyone else. In some states where adultery is illegal, your spouse can sue you and force you to pay the consequences if you get caught cheating. However, the government should view this cheating as truly nothing but sexual freedom, an important virtue. Therefore, the government should actually place a permanent ban on marriage because it limits sexual freedom. So, do not get married because you can get sued by your spouse if you are caught expressing your sexual freedom. </p>
<p>We need to ban marriage completely in today’s society. Society will benefit greatly from the nonexistence of marriage, since it has become nothing but a lousy piece of paper. The social and economic advantages of banning marriage include sexual freedoms, the rebuilding of the economy by paying more money, and the improvement of the lives of children. Finally, society will equally accept all the illegitimate children the same way as non-illegitimate children because marriage no longer exists. People can avoid bridezillas, bride wars, monsters-in-law, and wedding crashers in their lifetime. So, if you do not want to get married, you can explain it this way to your partner, "Listen, honey, I love you so much, I want to spend my entire life with you, I want to move in and live you, I want to spend all my time with you, I want to do everything that most married couples do, I even want to have kids with you… but I don’t want to marry you, if any of that makes sense, hopefully.</p>