Applying a second time

Prep School Admissions
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Hey guys! I got waitlisted by Exeter last year when I applied for a spot in the 9th grade class and I found out yesterday that I got in as a new lower when trying again. It’s tough and it was an emotional and roller coaster two years but it all feels worth it looking back now! I sent letters to the schools I got waitlisted at and decided to give it another shot once the waitlist closed. I put more effort into my application, made sure to really highlight who I really am and make it obvious to the AOs and this year I didn’t try hard on the interviews. Seeing that it didn’t work last year I came into it this year open minded and just showed them who I am. I didn’t do a tour or a visit, since I live in the West Coast.

One big tip that I learned is to just be you. If they think your a good fit for the school, they prob wont care too much about your test scores as long as their good enough. And it’s probably pretty obvious to tell when someone is overexaggerating or making their essay too formal or stiff. So just be you! Also, im pretty sure AOs like it when people apply again, shows that your commited.

If anyone has any questions or just wants to talk, you can pm me or reply lol :slight_smile: you got this :slight_smile:

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I think @Trebuchet hits the nail on the head about so much of it but especially expanding the list.

Everyone who has experience with BS will tell you that “name recognition at as cocktail party”, which is "prestige " is not a way to judge quality. Sure, most of the household names are great schools but so are the ones you may not know. But most people apply to the same 10 schools because they are the ones they have heard of.

Sometimes it’s a matter of going a little beyond your geography (SAS, Hill, Peddie, Mercersberg, Westtown, George, Blair, for example, all fly a little lower on the radar because they are not in NE.) But mostly, it’s doing the research.

This is a huge decision. You owe it to yourself to really know what’s out there.

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@Trebuchet I’m an older 8th grader (I turned 14 before the first day of school). Would it be uncomfortable for me to hang out with kids are around two years younger than I am? I was planning on comparing curriculums to see how much of a disadvantage new 10th graders are at. How many of the upper grade classes would I be able to take? (I’m taking Bio honors this year, and Chemistry and Physics honors next year)

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I thought of some more reasons why I may have gotten in.

  1. I wasn't passionate enough.

I remember them asking about my family at interviews and being like “Uh, yeah. My brother exists. He’s kinda cool.” DON’T BE LIKE THAT!! Be passionate about the people and things you love.

  1. I don't have any accomplishments that I'm particularly proud of.

The only awards I’ve won in competitions are math awards, and I’m not passionate about math. So, I thought that was all I had to offer. NO! There is so much more. The question isn’t emphasizing the accomplishments, it’s about what you’re proud of!! Don’t be like me and talk bout things you’re happy you did. If I could go back, I would have talked about how proud I am of my art club!! (:

  1. I've never overcome any challenges.

At interviews, I would say things like, “oh yeah that math competition was hard.” or “yep i couldn’t speak english when i went to kindergarten.” or “oh i thought i was supposed to restart my project because i literally can’t speak korean.”

Yes, these are challenges.

Did I overcome them? No. Or kinda. But not really!!

I’m going into this year now, with two challenges overcome: this whole boarding school thing, and gaining self-confidence!!

  1. I wasn’t confident.

Though I never expected I would get into none of them, I didn’t expect to get into many of them either. I went into this process knowing there were musicians playing at fancy music halls, super smart people who got 1600 on the SAT in 7th grade (looking at you @ttK5050 :p), and so much more. I used to be very insecure about people being better than me (which was stupid, hang out around people who are better than you at things so you can learn from them!! and just because they’re better at things than you doesn’t mean they’re better people. also doesn’t mean you’re a better person), so that came back for a while here. I think it probably showed through subconsciously.

I also wasn’t confident as a person. I was going through this period of time where I would hyperanalyze everything everyone said and isolating myself and I felt stupid for feeling like I was struggling in school and thought my personality was terrible and that everyone hated me. Yeah this is my edgy 8th grade agenda. Most of this was a result of self deprecating self talk. Don’t be mean to yourself, though I know how hard it can be. Being nice to yourself can be a life changer.

This reason is the primary reason why I don’t think I got in. When I applied, I really wasn’t ready to go to boarding school. Since then, I’ve grown immensely, and I think that will work in my favor.

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@Trebuchet you’re an absolute gem for writing all that. Wonderful!

@avilynnnn I think we can agree that you’re an example of precisely the type of grit/character-buildi

@mondaydevil based on your introspection, I suspect that your story next year may sound a lot like @avilynnnn 's by the end. Good luck! As for the age differences, I wouldn’t worry too much about that. Most schools have placement tests across many departments. Between that and the fact that so many kids repeat it’s not unusual at all for kids 2+ years apart in age to hang out (at least from what we’ve seen). You’ll find your way…

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@mondaydevil It is my impression (again, see caveats on my level of experience) that you would not be two years older than most of your class. Especially the men skew older.

St. Paul’s, in pushing for our on-the-grade-young-side child to switch to a ninth grade application, said expressly there were “a few” even 16 year olds in 9th, and implied most students in their 9th are 15 years old. Groton the previous year had one person say “have you considered re-applying for 8th” (which they have, natch.) I think the maturity necessary for living away, the heavy emphasis on sports, and the fact that so many wealthy families hold back children for kindergarten skews the average ages older. Several of the other schools hinted at this but my daughter just didn’t to do it.

There is zero boarding school stigma for repeating a grade, no college is going to say, “whoa, this person must have failed Ninth grade to do it again.”

I don’t know about courses etc. but there too they said not to worry we’d be assigned to appropriate level courses no matter the grade.

I think this would be really helpful information for the schools to share, and you should feel free to ask them.

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Some really awesome posts in this thread. I love the grit and determination shown by the kids and the helpful posts from the parents who have been this route before.
I am slowly coming out of my ‘all waitlist bar one’ daze and am happy to see that DD is already looking to 21/22 application with a ‘how/what can I do better, lessons learned, this will make me stronger, i am resilient’ mindset.

Go get em kiddos!

Signed
amumof2 (one of which is @soo2024 :smile: )