I am keeping a record here of all the essays I’ve practiced for SAT writing to see my development over time. This is for entertainment purposes, I’m a nut, and you are free to ignore this thread.
1/3/14
Practice Test #1 Essay #1
PROMPT: Should people take more responsibility for solving problems that affect their communities or the nation in general?
I walked into a group of 5 friends, gathered around the math building, talking animatedly about the “injustice” of a math teacher ensuring the inability for them to get anything above a C. I listened to the tirades of complaints against the teacher’s teaching, grading, choice of dress and knew without a change in attitude, these people were never going to see an A.
One of the common traits all successful people share is that they hold themselves responsible for life’s course of events. Knowing that the only factor one can control is oneself, successful people take responsibilities. The uncompromised result is that successful people end up with incredible work ethics because of their belief that they can change their situations, that responsibility is held in their hands.
On a look at the nation, independence and self sufficiently of the citizen is vital, that every citizen feels responsible for their courses of action. A whole is a sum of the parts; if each person took responsibilities to solve problems in their lives, the nation would be better in general.
The 5 friends were never going to get better test scores without a change in attitude because they didn’t hold themselves responsible for their test grades. Instead of improving themselves and studying harder, they merely blamed the teacher. If a grade is representative of achievement and a student doesn’t hold herself responsible to improve, how can she expect good grades?
Given score: 3/4
1/4/14
Practice Test #3 Essay #2
PROMPT: Can knowledge e a burden rather than a benefit? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies experience, or observations.
"ignorance is bliss" is the topic of Jim Carry's movie The Truman Show, where a man blissfully lives a life in a virtual reality show, until the knowledge of his state creates dissonance that ultimately drives him nuts in his pursuit out of his state. Knowledge can be a burden rather than a benefit. It creates disparity of thought that leads to the destruction of mental peace.
Take the example of John Nash, a genius mathmatitian driven to the brink of insanity. To say John Nash had an extensive knowledge of math is an understatement. In the elite Princeton, he knew more than even his professors, skipping class claiming it would ruin his creativity. Nash's genius was ultimately recognized in a noble peace prize for economics. Though publicly recognized, Nash's personal life was a mess. He was unable to relate to others due to disparity in knowledge and suffered hallucination where too much observed information allowed him to create a pseudo reality where he was pursued by Russian spies. Nash's extensive knowledge turned out to be more of a burden than a benefit and ultimately ended in his hospitalization.
The industrial revolution started as an expansion of technological knowledge, of the development of cotton gins, spread of crops like potatos, and increased understanding of mechanicalization. However the burdens of the industrial revolution were tremendous. London developed a reputation for being a black city of smog, factory workers become injured by the thousands, cholera spread rampantly as people flocked to the cities without improvements in heath, and the environmental well-being of Earth was shattered forever as humans tramped over mother nature to build "bigger and better" things for some short term profits. For the long term well being of our race, was the industrial revolution really that great? Is the event that exponentially increased the destruction our environment which houses is really going to help with the survival of our race. In the case of the industrial revolution, it is arguable that the knowledge of better technology and more efficient crops became a burden rather than a benefit; it fast forwarded the human race's path to self destruction.
Although knowledge is universally given a positove conotation, it is important to recognize the burdens of carrying it. This is demonstrated even by the small gossip flying around school that has the potential to annihilate a persons reputation. Knowledge IS power, power than be used destructively.
Given score: 5
1/5/14
Practice Test #4 Essay #3
PROMPT: Do changes that make our lives easier not necessarily make them better? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.
I remember distinctly a conversation I had with my tennis coach regarding modern day society always being in a rush to do things. Although he marveled at our generation's ability to look up tennis strokes on YouTube within seconds, He questioned whether the development of such technology was a vice or virtue, claiming our generation is unable to sit around and enjoy a beer for pleasure since we are always rushing to beat the rat race of time.
Some argue to changes that make our lives easier do not necessarily make them better, citing examples of iphone text messages distracting students from studying. Change can be a double edged sword. As with all things in life, there are consequences to everything. However, why wouldn't technology that make life easier make life better? Is easier not synonamous to better? Change that makes life easier only serve to open up time to things one truely enjoys. Because we are in a rat race against time, making some things easier is the only way to make other things better.
Farming has taken a dramatic turn in the century. We went from peasants farming rice paddies by hand to industrialized monsters, freeing up billions of people to pursue intellectual interests. The industrial revolution wouldn't have happened without such dramatic agricultural change. People would still be spending the greater proportion of their life worrying about whether or not they will receive their next meal. The change in farming technology is one clear case of a change that made people's life easier. By allowing people more leisure time, the human race has been able to make intellectual breakthroughs more revolutionarily that that of the past 10,000 years of humanity combined, surpassing even the compass of Earth's confinement with the landing of Aaron Armstrong to the moon.
Another technology that has clearly made life easier was the development of social media. Sites like Facebook and Twitter have unlocked one of the most closely doors in history; the door to each other. Now, it is easier than ever to talk to people from across the globe. Adolescents can now feel that surge of happiness when grandmothers from China likes their prom photos. Teens can follow Pope Francisco on twitter and follow up on every thought he has on a personal level. Social media has become a bridge of communication that has allowed the antipodes of the world to hold hands and talk about common values. Not only has social media made our lives easier, it has also made them better by bringing flavors of culture to our plates.
Changes may not make lives better but changes that make life easier definitely makes life better. Ease in some things creates greater opportunities to greater explore others, allowing us to make unprecedented human breakthroughs.
Given score: unknown so far.
(LOL at how I wrote Aaron instead of Neil Armstrong)
My own critiques: I need to write more coherent writing, without missing word.
How to improve: Plan faster, write faster, save 2 mins to revise.
Practice Test #5 Essay #4
PROMPT: Is Conscience a more powerful motivator than money, fame, or power?
Supposingly, the conscience is the strongest motivator, that a person's moral compass is what will stir the ship in the end. However idealistic though this theory is, it doesn't follow through Historically money, fame, and power has triumph over conscience as the source of motivation for many of the world's greatest minds.
Chairman Mao is the quintessential example of a power monger who threw his conscience away for governing power of China, killing hundreds of party opposition relentlessly. Additionally, to portray China as a prosperous country and to save his image from being scarred by his failed stimulus program, Chairman Mao continued to export millions of tons of rice, at the expense of his own starving nation. At the expense of millions of lost lives, Mao successful increased China's fame as an economically developing nation. For the sake of national fame and personal power, Mao destroyed his moral compass with an iron-clad fist. In this case, conscience was definitely not a more powerful motivator than fame and power.
A more recent example is the infamous wall street fraudulent Jordan Belfort. Belfort grew up with an affiliation for money, an affiliation so strong that it pushed him to leave dentistry school for wall street. He is famously quoted as saying "I walked into dentistry school, heard that the profession is not as lucrative as in the past, and walked out." Being motivated by money is not by itself a terrible thing. However, Belfort scammed thousands of people for numbers, destroying lifesavings built up in lifetimes. Conscience never impeded Belfort's gold sniffing nose and conscience was definitely NEVER a primary motivator for the money lusting "wolf"
Some might argue that conscience always hits in the end, that the cognitive dissonance between right and wrong will always strike those with guilt. One an even cite literary references such as Dimmersdale's eventual destruction in the Scarlet Letter. However, it is important to differentiate between the terms motivation and consequence. Although acting against one's conscience has its consequences, it is a completely different story to say conscience was the primary motivation of any large scaled action.
Conscience is not a more powerful motivator than money, fame, or power. Mao shows us this didn't hold true 50 years ago, and Belfort shows us this doesn't hold true now. Although this is an idealistic human concept, it ultimately does not prove operative in the course of human instinct.