<p>Having moved to the Southeast fairly recently from “up north”, I’m noticing some differences in the way women are perceived…Maybe its just my age group…wondering if its in the next generation at the college level as well…I call it the “barbie doll syndrome”…am I generalising too much?</p>
<p>I think you will get some responses more or less dumping on the South, and I cannot say I am an expert on the region, just an occasional visitor. But I do know that the few young women I know who attend southern schools (“good” ones) have found them academically challenging with no sense that women are not supposed to be smart and hardworking; they enjoy the surface perks of having doors held open and such, without finding substantive negatives. There may very well be a world of stereotypes alive and welI in the South (as in other places), but I suspect that for people who are able to get beyond the surface you will find women of good will and intelligence everywhere (even if some of them do enjoy dressing up for semiformals on weekends or wearing earrings that look great against their long, shiny hair), and men who appreciate them for what they are. That’s not to say there isn’t a differnce in regional perceptions of women, but I think the Barbie doll syndrome is an oversimplification and can’t really be applied just to one part of the country in any case.</p>
<p>Thanks for that, Mattmom…I hope you’re right because I have a daughter!</p>
<p>Dke, I agree with Mattmom. Most of the differences are truly superficial. People are more traditionally “mannerly” in the South. Children are raised to say yes ma’am, yes sir, and they do it all the time. Boys are taught to open doors for young ladies, and we love an excuse for a party and dress-up. There are situations where women are treated as objects - frat parties are “meat markets” to some extent no matter where you go - and girls are much more concerned with make-up and appearance. But it is a little different, in that girls are taught that you should look nice as a form of armor, maybe, its not about pleasing guys anymore, it is a type of identification, empowerment - hard to explain, but I always wanted to look well put together for ME, for how it made me feel.
In a public setting like college, I think you will find attitudes toward women no different than anywhere else, a mix of good and bad. In my daughter’s high school, 3 of the 4 top kids are female, and 2 young ladies are considering military academies, and there are a few Barbies as well.</p>
<p>Our family’s Saturday routine… my wife, daughter and I wake up, eat breakfast then shower and dress casually but attractively then head out to Wal Mart and Target to buy whatever cleaning supplies we need. THEN we come home to clean bathrooms, the kitchen and the rest of the house and yard… While at the stores we chatted with friends and neighbors and got caught up on the happenings at our kids’ schools…We know we’ll run into people we know…You just don’t go to the store without getting properly dressed and groomed…appearances and manners are important “down here”…both to men and women… But the importance of appearances doesn’t translate into any notion of dumbing down to please or be accepted… As Cangel said the top students along with the civic and business leaders are just as likely to be female…I’d simply add they’ll be well dressed and mannered females.</p>
<p>Frazzleddad, I’d never leave the house if I had to get properly groomed and dressed each time. :)</p>
<p>…BY comparison, young women are more conscious of their bodies in this day and age, especially with South Florida fashions," schwartz says. “The more you expose, the more you want to look good.”</p>
<p>Dr. Eugene J. Sidoti Jr., a Scarsdale plastic suurgeon, says that he and his colleagues in this area (Metropolitan NY area) haven’t seen as large a leap in teen patients who want biggest busts. He theorizes that the figures indicating a national implant boom have been driven mostly by patients in the South and West…</p>
<p>This article appeared in today The Journal News. Perhaps it is the “Barbie Doll Syndrome” as described by Dke.</p>
<p>That’s exactly what I’m talking about, t1388…the most requested graduation present at our public high school (my kids aren’t there) is a set of implants…lovely…</p>
<p>Not at my daughter’s school - now Lasik surgery and permanent eyeliner, that’s a different story.</p>
<p>…thing is…if I get buy something like that for my daughter’s graduation my wife will want something also…makes for an expensive graduation…</p>
<p>No implants for this Mom - more like botox and lifts/tucks!</p>
<p>I have found my gradually-worsening vision beautifully fixes the gradually deepening lines on my face…</p>
<p>Wow, where do you all live? No teenager I know gets implants [most wear minimal or no makeup], no adult woman looks like a Barbie, and no one - and I mean no one - has ever looked good at the local Walmart or Target. Most people around here look kind of relaxed and nondescript. Honestly, if I dressed up too much for a mom’s meeting or to go to the kid’s school people would look at me strangely.</p>
<p>We live in Northeast Florida.</p>
<p>Yeah, where I live is so casual that if I so much as apply mascara my youngest starts asking, "Where are you going–Can I come too?–Who is babysitting me?</p>
<p>I don’t think the emphasis on appearance is confined just to the South - where I live is very appearance-conscious, too. The current joke in my house is that when I go to college, I will <em>gasp</em> wear pants!! (Perhaps not funny to most people, but I wear a skirt three or four school days a week and “dressy” pants the remaining days; skirts all five days in nice weather.) When my mum really wants to irk me she tells me about her college years and says that she wore nice sweaters and jeans all the time, to which I wail, aghast - “But I only have one pair of jeans!”</p>
<p>Cangel, I agree with you with why girls in my community are “taught” to dress nicely - while we do have the occasional Barbie, the majority of women dress well because it makes themselves feel “powerful.” On a day I look my best I feel I can do anything; that sounds archaic but it’s the truth. Manners are also heavily emphasized… Southern values in the Northern Midwest, who knew? 
There is a sizeable exodus of students from my school to Southern universities; I applied to Vanderbilt (which isnt far South but compared to where I live, it seems that way).</p>
<p>Edit: I suppose it’s important to note that I live in a fairly old-fashioned community that tends to have more of a “good ol’ boys” atmosphere than what is ideal. Things haven’t really changed here in nearly sixty years - which is both good and bad, in my opinion.</p>
<p>Oh we moved here from the west coast, San Francisco via Vegas and it was culture shock for us and we are in Carolina. And yes, people do dress nicer at all places like Walmart but they also sit on their porches swapping biscuit and sweet tea recipes so all in all it has been a new and wonderful experience. I have DD’s and DS’s and yes there are some differences in how they are treated from on the west coast. And we are in a small rural southern town. Like we stepped back a few generations. </p>
<p>Oldest DD attends state, other DD practices at Carolina and son worked this summer at Duke in cancer research and overall there were no significant differences. Much more subtle…for example my oldest DD is referred to as Miss (first name) by her fellow male students and professors rather than just her first name. Same with younger DD at the high school, and it is definitely “yes sir” “yes ma’am” on every question. Except its real s l o w , you know that southern drawl. And yes doors are opened…it was very noticeable to the girls especially since they had been coming from Vegas, which is a different universe.</p>
<p>And yes there are “barbie” dolls, just not as garish as they were in Vegas. Heck in Vegas, they were PAID to look like that!!!</p>
<p>Maybe its the newness (been here a year) or just how different it is from the craziness that is Vegas and the Bay area, but we do love it here! And I have become addicted to sweet tea!</p>
<p>Kat</p>
<p>Gracili, you should correspond with my daughter, she’s on the Dartmouth board occasionally, I think you would have a lot in common. She wears uniforms to school, and is looking forward to trading in her skirts for the (at least occasional) pair of pants. She is resistant somewhat to the prevailing culture because most make-up eventually breaks her out, and has a good complexion to “go bare”.</p>
<p>I had to laugh at Frazzledad - here you have to dress up for Target and Lowe’s, but not Walmart. Also, I do this and I know some of my friends do as well - if you go shopping, particularly at nicer ladies clothing shops, and just want to look to see if the stuff has gone on sale (just looking, not buying), dress down, no make-up, the sales ladies won’t acknowledge your existence. If you are in to buy, not shop, make-up and a nice outfit is a requirement, even if it is a pain to try clothes on;).</p>
<p>What a nifty thread. I just adore Southern Gentlemen!!!</p>
<p>this is hilarious, in nyc theres a mix. at my school you cant look like you’re trying at all, which gets pretty ridiculous bc you get girls with messy ponytails that took them 15 mins to get right, and theyll be wearing $100 juicy sweat and a C&C california shirt. i’m sure that people worry abou their looks just about equally everywhere, just some places its ok to admit, and some its not. :)</p>