<p>Okey dokey. Thread’s not off to a good start here. </p>
<p>Instead of debating theology, limit yourself to an honest and very personal answer to the OP’s question in the gray box here. </p>
<p>Good: Discuss parental/dating concerns/thoughts/feelings in this hypothetical scenario </p>
<p>Bad: Bashing religions unfamiliar to you; extolling those familiar to you.</p>
<p>The moderators will continue to monitor this thread to see how it goes and whether the thread can stay up. We moderate all posts according to Terms of Service (see FAQ) as our rubric of rules.</p>
<p>*When I asked the question about beefs with Catholics, I didn’t mean things like abortion, the Pope is this or that, or the molestation scandals, etc. I was thinking more along the lines of things that you’d be wary of if your kids became friends with them or dated them (e.g., they seem to drink too much). *</p>
<p>Oh, please. What a stereotype.</p>
<p>*mom2collegekids, I didn’t take it that beawinner was applying that stereotype to Catholics. She was applying the hypothetical to whatever stereotype one might have, based on her initial post. It was a general statement, as if to say “do [insert group] actually drink too much, or is that just a stereotype?” *</p>
<p>I suggest that you reread what was written. The antecedent to the pronoun “them” is Catholics. </p>
<p>*the thing i don’t understand is how anyone who participates or allows an abortion is automatically excommunicated, but if one commits any other sort of ‘murder,’ one is still at least allowed the sacraments. *</p>
<p>Uh, no. If you commit murder or any other serious sin, you can’t receive the sacraments. No one in the state of serious sin is supposed to receive the sacraments. </p>
<p>Why do people who know little or nothing about the Church think they can claim to know what the Church does or teaches?</p>
<p>Yes, please close this thread-- this thread just brings attacks and insults to religion in general, one of the good thing any person could have…</p>
<p>OK, so to the original op question–no one responded to the first questions about the customs of people from India. I too am curious.</p>
<p>I was not happy when my D got seriously involved with an Israeli. He and his family were so close nit and had no, or few, non-jewish friends. My D was raised a Christian. I knew if they considered marrying, she would have to convert. Given I am a Christian, that would be a disappointment to me.</p>
<p>Actually the teacher uses the term and does so every academic year with each new class. It’s inflammatory, and if it were put in the context of a political issue wouldn’t offend so much, but really. I too have had many Catholic friends who take a very balanced view and do not insult others with their belief about the issue of choice. Doesn’t matter that much to me anymore but it was an eye opener at first. The bigger issue for me as a non-Catholic and getting back to the OP’s question, is the issue of exclusivity. Again, not all are like that, but I do find that Catholics come in different flavors and many take their religion cafeteria style. . . i.e., not all are willing to follow the straight and narrow path of the classical religion.</p>
<p>Don’t know about the Indian question. We visited India just recently and generally found many people were pretty friendly. . . even though they were obviously under a lot of stress because of political fears. The Indians here in the US I’ve come across are just as friendly as anyone else, maybe even friendlier overall.</p>
<p>Maybe you just need a new brand of deodorant, Schmaltz! (His best friend wouldn’t tell him . . . .) There were lots of Indian families living in the apartment building I just moved from after 10 years, and they were every bit as friendly, and every bit as likely to say hi while in or waiting for the elevator, as members of any other ethnic group. </p>
<p>I cannot believe some of the ignorant comments about Catholics in this thread. What, it’s 1850 and you all belong to the Know-Nothing Party? Ridiculous, and unbelievably offensive.</p>
<p>Catholics don’t make friends with “outsiders”? (Usually, that’s what people say about the Jews!) They’re intolerant? All I can tell you is that growing up in New York City and spending my whole life in the Northeast, just about every close friend I’ve ever had who wasn’t Jewish was Roman Catholic, and they’ve consistently been the most tolerant and empathetic people I’ve known – whether they were Irish, Italian, German, any combination thereof, or any other ethnicity. My very strongly negative feelings about the official positions of the Catholic Church on various issues, and my opinions of the present Pope (or any previous ones), have always been entirely irrelevant to friendship, both for me and for my Catholic friends (lapsed or otherwise).</p>
<p>About the Indian thing, if you are a man and you;re waving to women they might be shy to reply. otherwise, I think you’ve just got unfriendly neighbours. Lots of people I know in India are very friendly with their neighbours, regardless of ethnicity (so I don’t think it’s a racism issue)</p>
<p>Warning-devout Catholic who has been teaching the faith for 20plus years. </p>
<p>Regarding the Catholic high school teacher referenced- The use of inflammatory language to make a point is just plain bad teaching style for high schoolers. Regardless of whether the subject is religion, science, politics, etc. </p>
<p>As for the Indian neighbors- Maybe you just have unfriendly neighbors, as said elsewhere. Or,it could be that folks of recent immigration (1-2 generations) are wary of interacting with others, given that they may have experienced prejudice in the past. </p>
<p>As for my daughter dating a Catholic, I would be delighted, as long as he was not a seminarian.</p>
<p>I have a question regarding the Catholic faith. At least I think it’s about the faith, but it could be just an individual’s opinion or interpretation. The husband of a devout friend and neighbor died (cancer) in his forties, leaving her to raise 2 h.s. kids. He had converted from another Christian denomination prior to their wedding and was also a devout Catholic when he died. Couple of years later, she was planning her wedding and mentioned that she’d always be married to First Husband in the eyes of god. She married a non-Catholic, but was married by a priest in her church. Second Husband doesn’t attend services with her, but she seems happy attending on her own. I’m surprised that she believes she’s always be married to First Husband in the eyes of god. Can somebody explain if that is in keeping with the Catholic faith?</p>
<p>In the Catholic Church, marriage ends with the death of a spouse. In the eyes of God, she is married to her second husband - who is alive. She would not have been able to get remarried in the Church if “in the eyes of God,” she was still married to her first husband (who is deceased). </p>
<p>If what she is saying were true, then she’d be living in sin with her second husband…which she is not. You might want to point that out to her. Her present marriage is a sacramental marriage (married in the Church), therefore what she is saying makes no sense.</p>
<p>I suggest that she get some clarification with her priest. I am confident that any priest (liberal, middle, or conservative) will give the same answer that I have given.
:)</p>
<p>BTW…we aren’t “married” in heaven. There would be no purpose for that - we have no need to be married in heaven. </p>
<p>I have wanted to start a thread like this for a long time, but was wary of doing it. I am curious in a non-judgmental way about certain customs of other groups and would like to have them explained.</p>
<p>1) About orthodox Judaism: I understand the importance of wearing modest, gender-appropriate clothing, but why primarily black even on really hot days? I would think other dark colors would offer similar modesty (not being see-through). Are brighter colors considered too attention-getting? Also, why do so many Orthodox parents dress their girls in matching outfits even when they’re not twins? Is this to avoid sibling jealousy over clothing? I understand the prohibition against working on the Sabbath. I’m not sure I understand the prohibiton against completing an electrical circuit, even if it means more work on the Sabbath. For example, at garage sale a Jewish mother was looking for the wind-up, non-electrical baby swings for this very reason. Wouldn’t winding it up on the Sabbath be more work than running it on a battery? And finally, I think women are not supposed to allow their hair to be seen by anyone other than their husbands. So did that lead to the prevalent use of wigs, which in turn led to shaving their head because wigs are hot? </p>
<p>2) Why do Hispanics call their children “Mami” or “Mamita”? (Mommy?) I think I’ve heard Indian people do this too.</p>
<p>*Couple of years later, she was planning her wedding and mentioned that she’d always be married to First Husband in the eyes of god. She married a non-Catholic, but was married by a priest in her church. *</p>
<p>I should have added…</p>
<p>Perhaps she is confused because her second husband isn’t Catholic. It doesn’t matter. </p>
<p>Her marriage to her first husband ended at his death. Whether she remained single or not, she is no longer married to him “in the eyes of God” according to the Catholic Church. The moment she married her second husband in the Church, she became married to him in the “eyes of God.” Remind her that in the Church, the marrying couple are the ministers of the sacrament of marriage (the priest/deacon is merely an official Church witness). She has a sacramental marriage to her second husband, therefore in the eyes of God, she is married to HIM.</p>
<p>All of the female Puerto Ricans in my workplace call other females “Mami”, too. Can’t say I’m fond of the practice - I don’t enjoy being called by that name by some 30 year old woman.</p>
<p>On Orthodox Jews: Not wearing colors is theoretically about modesty, as far as I know, although I think the preference for black over, say, dark blue is more traditional than anything else. In certain Jewish communities, certain customs are given the status of a requirement: the Hasidim who wear streimels (the fur hats) for instance, don’t expect members of other equally devout sects (who wear more ordinary black hats) to do the same, but consider it an obligation for members of their own community.</p>
<p>I’m not sure about girls wearing matching clothing, but I would guess that it it is simply more convenient than picking out different outfits for so many children.</p>
<p>Sabbath, and as this is one I (largely) follow, I’m on firmer ground here: There are thirty-nine categories of work prohibited in the Torah, many of them describing tasks that are obviously geared toward agricultural laborers. When rabbis have considered new technology to determine whether or not it violates the prohibition, they haven’t judged by how much work is being done, but as to how closely it resembles one of the thirty-nine biblical categories. However, observant families will typically avoid even arduous jobs that are technically permissible because it isn’t considered “Shabbasdik,” or in the spirit of shabbos.</p>
<p>An additional consideration is whether or not something can be construed as a creative act, since the subtext of a number of the thirty-nine categories is that we should refrain from creating things to commemorate G-d resting from creation. Ironically, one type of potential creation that is not only permitted but encouraged on the Sabbath is sex.</p>
<p>Wigs - Some Orthodox groups agree that wearing a wig defeats the purpose and don’t do it. The reason some groups are OK with it is that it isn’t strictly a modesty law in the way that, say, women wearing skirts rather than pants is. An unmarried woman of any age can walk around and even pray with her head uncovered (although very religious women often tie single girls hair back in ponytails because they consider it more modest). Covering hair is instead supposed to signify that her hair (or, in broader terms, her sexuality) belongs to her husband. Thus, since it is as much a symbolic gesture as an actual effort to make oneself less desirable, some argue that wearing a wig, even a particularly attractive one, is sufficient.</p>
<p>I hear Amish kids usually go to school through the 8th grade. Do any of them get to finish High School, do they get to go to college ever. Are there any Amish doctor’s or vets or teacher’s. I always wonder about that.</p>
<p>I grew up Catholic. If other Christians had something against me they said it was because I was not a “real Christian” whatever that means, I did not accept Jesus Christ as my savior and prayed to the pope not to Jesus.</p>
<p>I don’t want this to be a debate but just what I was told as a kid. Now my kids are heathen churchless people because I’m just not comfortable with the Catholic church. My choice.</p>
<p>When Hispanic men I don’t know have addressed me – as when for some reason they’ve started talking to me in the street – they have, on more than one occasion, called me “Mami” (as in, “hey, Mami, need a ride?”). I was pretty insulted that these men thought I was old enough to be their mother, until someone recently explained to me that that wasn’t what they meant. What did I know.</p>