I just started my second semester of my first year at college. It truly is the perfect school for me. My program is great, it is the exact type of community I wanted when I was searching for a school, and I’ve made some great friends. I have a problem that’s becoming sort of big, though. I feel so homesick and sad most of the time.
My first semester I was able to ignore it, but now it’s becoming sort of an issue. Whenever I come home, even for a day (I live an hour away), I always leave in tears and I don’t know what to do. I truly love this school, but it has become a sort of sad place for me.
Does anyone have any advice? On how to deal with this sort of thing or just homesickness in general? I hate to sound whiney and sad but I’m really caught between a rock and a hard place because it’s either stay at a perfect school and be sad or transfer to a different school and live at home.
You need to stop going home for a while. It is confusing your mind and making your issue worse. Try to stay on campus other than breaks and it will ease up after a while.
I have been an exchange student in the US for a year. At the beginning it was super hard for me to be far away from my home and my family and I kept calling my mum like 5 times a day. This kept me from making new friends and enjoying my life there. Once I stopped talking to and of my parents and my friends so much, it got so much easier that I’ll be coming back for college six months from now.
Skype one time each day…Try to do it late at night. So during the day you will have something to look forward to…And after you Skype (set a time limit of 10-15 min…No longer) you will sleep better because you talked to your family. Go home only every 3 weeks…So it’s something to look forward to. Try to get involved in a club… or go to the gym… get more involved. Growing up and going away is hard. Try to enjoy college…But keep in touch. After a few weeks of Skype…Try every other day.
You post is already a few months old and maybe you have solved the issue of homesickness. But this is something I’ve thought about and have a different take on it than others, so maybe it will be useful to you or someone else.
I have always been surprised by the common idea that a person should simply leave all they know and love for parts unknown, and be expected to make the huge adjustment easily.
Just expected to make it. How cold and detached would you have to be for that to work? Or how much of a narcissist, without genuine bonded-ness?
Your homesickness is not a mental illness. I hope you have not been prescribed a medication to help you float away from your lifelong attachments to family and home that nurtured you and supported you.
Instead, acknowledge and celebrate the successful emotional and cognitive attachments you have formed: They may make you a great parent yourself someday.
Search out others on your campus who understand how important those bonds are: Try getting together with others on your campus who see service to others as important. Try volunteering to teach reading to disadvantaged children, or join EMS training.
Do go home as often as you want. Because the world can be a cold place. I personally think we are in an epic drought of empathy, and for many of us that is painful and perplexing.