Baby Celebration - NOT a Baby Shower

Parent Cafe
21

This sounds wonderful! My daughters are the same way and that they don’t like attention and crappy games at baby showers that they attend.

At one of my school assignments, I had a teacher colleague who knew that I came up with creative ideas to get my speech students to participate and buy-in to learning, so she asked me to be the “entertainment director” because she didn’t want anything too outlandish (or non-participative by a number of teachers - men or elderly) who didn’t want to do the shower thing.

I suggested that we do yearly birthday cards for the new baby.
I bought a couple of boxes of plain cards with envelopes (at Michael’s) with extra boxes for redo’s.

I had a sign-up sheet for year 2 through 25 (they had invited the whole school staff, including the Admin staff so she thought we might have 25, but I planned for more. We left “year one” for grandma or parents.

Then, she and I combined our craft boxes from home and got all manner of stamps, markers, colored pencils, crayons, cut outs from Creative Memories and non-messy writing instruments.

On the memo board, I had written~:

Please design and create a birthday card for this child to be opened on that year of his or her birthday. Please sign up for a year of their birthday, such as that card will be open by the child on that day.

Neither Diana, nor I knew how popular this activity would be.

The men, especially, tended to take their time and were phenomenal in their thoughts and designs. Some cards were hysterical! Some cards made us cry. Some cards were beautiful with advice and love. I loved the wit, thought, and art.

One of our teachers was pretty good at art and drew a hillside with a horse or two and when you opened the card, it said:

“The secret is OUT!! go outside to the backyard and find your pony!”

Diana and her husband Sean, read through all the cards later, and were overwhelmed. Both were in tears.

Every year she’d post her Facebook and show the cards.

The smart thing they did was to label the card, at the bottom back-edge about who had created the card, what they taught, and the dates involved.

Everyone did it on their own time, but I noticed that all the teachers were really moved by the activity.

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22

And I just attended a 100th birthday party which was not only “no gifts” but the kids and grandchildren included a “grandma’s favorite charities” link on the invitation… and guess what, a cocktail table had to serve as a gift table because so many people brought stuff, stacked high.

A healthy 100 year old living in her original home (with all the “stuff” that goes with that) and now she has to shlep all these random scarves, salad bowls, hand lotion gift sets home?

So OP, don’t assume that people will show up empty handed! 100 years old and now her “regifting” closet is overflowing???

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23

LOL - we know what kind of gifts she’ll be bringing next time she attends a party of celebrates with others for their birthday.

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24

I think it’s a lovely idea.

My daughter is definitely a no gift person. She would be that person who would request no gifts.

My dil loved all the traditional traditions. Bridal shower, baby shower. All the games. Gifts. That’s her.

You can request. So try for the no gifts and if it happens then that’s what it is.

People do like to buy baby gifts.

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25

The baby birthday card gift idea is adorable! I think it would be perfect fig anniversaries as well. All shower guests could choose an anniversary & make a card.

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26

I’m not going to assume it, but I’m not going to encourage it. And there will be no public “table” for anything that might come!

This is a small group and most know each other to a certain degree. They can certainly reach out to a few key people if they are set on getting a gift - and then they can be referred to the small registry! D1 and her husband are largely only setting up that registry because they hae already had people ask about needs/gifts and they are not blind enough to realize it’s better to designate a small amount of stuff to be what they’d like then to have people buy stuff they don’t want or need.

They are not being rude in any way - they just don’t believe in an abundance of stuff and already know they have some (second hand) newborn stuff coming from their sister/SIL.

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27

I have one kid (and household) who is a minimalist and one who is the opposite.

I’ll let you guess who is who from my prior post :wink:

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28

I have almost exclusively been gifting baby books as baby gifts for many years now. I have never written anything in any of the books I gave. I guess that is the former librarian in me, don’t write in books! (I worked in a library for a year once.)

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29

When there was a shower for my niece…I bought a bookshelf as our gift, and books were brought by guests. We specifically asked them to put a card IN the book so we would know who it was from, but not to autograph it. And remarkably, everyone did. And yes…there were multiple copies of Goodnight Moon, and Brown Bear Brown bear​:slightly_smiling_face:

Since most everyone coming knows your family, I think you can spread the word about no gifts at this party. If people ask when, tell them to save their gift ideas until later (and then just drop the subject).

Enjoy your party…and I agree. No games!

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30

Two thoughts:

  1. Older people are more likely to buy gifts. Young people get that a lot of others their age are minimalists, and just don’t place as much importance on buying gifts.

  2. I am a person who Hates doing any sort of arts and crafts projects. I would really dislike being expected to create a card or anything like that. It would actually stress me out. I would never expect anyone to have to do this.

Just me.

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31

Maybe it’s just me. I’m probably totally off course. I’m trying to sort this in my mind. If you come 2.5 hours away that’s a trek. For an open house? No gifts? Meet and greet? I can meet and greet them at home and save a 5 hour trip. And bring a gift. Or send one when the baby is born. I’d RSVP no.

Maybe different if you live around the corner–that’s come and go. Nice afternoon.

No idea where MI family is. But if I’m coming from a long distance then I’ll be hanging around awhile to see everyone. Probably longer than an “open house”. But maybe that’s baked into plans. No idea.

32

The only people making a 2.5 trip are the father-to-be’s parents and sister’s family who are helping with the details and the parents-to-be best friends couple who can’t wait to come. The Michigan people are 40 minutes away with the exception of my H and my best friend couple who are two hours away and would drive double if they needed to! They are basically family.

I personally don’t understand how gifts and games make attending worthwhile. It’s basically a party without gifts and games!!

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33

I was just at a baby shower thrown by soon to be grandma and aunt. Family of baby lives 500 miles away. Instead of games, there was a table of plain, wooden alphabet blocks and a bunch of colored pens. Guests were asked to color/decorate one while we were all having welcome drinks. Some were elaborate (a few art teachers) some were minimal (mine!), but all colorful. The blocks are not going home with the mom to be….they are staying at Grandma’s house for future visits. And there were cards to fill out with suggestions for the soon to be parents.

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34

Another craft hater!

I dread having to make a birthday card or letter or craft.

I thought it was just me!

Lots of families and friends are happy for any excuse for a gathering. We drove 2 hours each way for a July 4th barbecue.

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35

I appreciate reading all suggestions- that’s what I came here for! I will likely use some of the wording suggested. I have no qualms about our game plan and I’ve already reached out to more than half of those who will be invited, explained that it will not be a traditional shower but a celebration and there is much excitement.

Any “French food” suggestions?

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36

I love the idea of croissant or baguette sandwiches and charcuterie boards!

You could also do quiche lorraine if you wanted to add something else.

Macrons for dessert with your cookie bar.

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37
  1. Many congrats to you and your family!
  2. I love Bonjour Baby.
  3. I also love the suggestion of donations to a diaper bank.

Wishing you all a wonderful time as you anticipate this addition to your family :heart_exclamation:

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38

Maybe you could do an amazon registry of children’s books that people can chose from. This way you only get books you want and no dups?

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39

They can put books if they want on their registry. For this event, no gifts means no gifts!

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40

I think Sam’s and Costco sell mini croissants, nice for sandwiches. (You could let guests pick from fixings from chicken salad or deli meat or veggies etc).