Bad at multitasking...any ideas for me?

Parent Cafe
1

<p>I have always been disorganized. I’ve made progress throughout adulthood though, and managed to successfully homeschool our 3 children (1 married and a military spouse, 1 just graduated college, 1 a college student) as well as helping H get our seasonal business started and keeping it going. Nevertheless, my poor organizational skills are still a problem and it seems to have gotten worse. Part of the reason is that instead of having one main focus at this time (like homeschooling used to be), I have many. I don’t need to choose one thing as a priority and neglect the others as none of them is a full-time job by itself, but I do need to keep several plates spinning at once. Another factor is likely that I am living alone for the first time in…well…forever, actually. So, I don’t have the structure of someone else in the house expecting anything of me.</p>

<p>This is what I have going: I have been a stay at home mom for the past 24 years and am 1 year into empty-nesterhood. H is deployed to Iraq for 4 more months as a member of the National Guard.<br>
*H and I have a seasonal business on which I should be working all year, even more so with him away. I really should spend 2-4 hours per day on it, but almost never do until the fall, when it’s more than full-time (because I didn’t do stuff ahead like I should have).
*I am chairman of marketing (volunteer) for a statewide organization of which we are members. In the course of that job I have written a detailed grant application, helped work on preparing a booth for a conference, and am setting up a session for our statewide convention. I really kind of hope the grant is not approved, because if it is, I will have to supervise all the projects that get funded. (It’s a long explanation, but just trust me on this - I am the one who needs to supervise these projects.)<br>
*I am going to be the secretary this year for a good-sized children’s ministry at our church.<br>
*I am doing quite a bit of redecorating/rejuvenating our house (paint, flooring, etc.). Okay, I’m not actually doing it, but I’m hiring contractors, which means phone calls, visiting stores, having contractors come and give bids, etc, along with emptying out bookcases and that kind of thing to prepare for stuff to get done.
*I probably spend an hour or more a day on the phone with H, the kids, or my mom.<br>
*I have various and assorted friends who are always wanting me to go to lunch and do things with them, though I have just limited that a lot as I don’t have time to go out to lunch twice a week.<br>
*I am trying to workout daily and the gym is 15 min. away (I do better with going there than working out at home).
*I have a vice, and it’s the computer. I spend too much time cruising all over the web and typing long messages like this one. However, I barely ever watch t.v. :)</p>

<p>I can’t seem to develop a routine because each day is different, depending on if I have a contractor coming, or I have stuff to do at church, or more than one kid is having a crisis at a time, or someone on a forum or email list clearly needs a message from me (you know who you are), or my exercise class is in the afternoon or evening…or whatever. The only good thing about all that is that I don’t have to cook!</p>

<p>If anyone can give me any suggestions on how to manage these things effectively, I am all ears. I would especially like to hear from those who are also not born-organized and have found ways to deal with their scatter-brainedness.</p>

2

<p>You could be me. What works for me: Exchange server, Outlook-enabled cell phone, and constantly making appointments with myself via the phone as I agree to a meeting or recognize a task I need to complete (the appointments pop up to remind me on the computer too).</p>

<p>The hardest part is keeping the appointments when they come up… that’s just a matter of discipline, which is what I’m always working on. But with the Exchange calendar, I can schedule everything as I need to, then easily get a visual record of each day as it comes. Works for me. If you don’t have access to an Exchange server, Gmail and Google calendar will work too.</p>

3

<p>It’s hard when you are working out of home. I would set a schedule everyday on how much time you would spend on each task. Use a calendar to remind you when you need to move on. You like to be on a computer - allow yourself one or two hours a day, but no more. I would suggest not to over schedule because you’ll feel guilty if you don’t get to everything. I have someone to help me at work, I will schedule an hour or two myself to some adminstrative work I don’t like to do</p>

4

<p>If you’re serious about wanting to get more (important) things done in less time, go read Tim Ferriss’ The 4-Hour Work Week. The basic premise is that either you control time, or it controls you. (If you don’t have time to read the book, it’s also available on tape!)</p>

<p>BTW, it’s likely that you’re already spending time the way you want to. Ferriss’ concept is intriguing, but how many of us want to start “freeing up time” by eliminating spouses, children, pets, etc. from our lives.</p>

5

<p>for me, it’s lists. I write down what needs to happen that week, then group it up into days (I would rather run all the errands in one day, etc). If I don’t write it down, it just sits in the back of my head nagging at me. I worry that I will forget a commitment, not show up when DH is expecting me at the business, etc. I do use a lot of 3x5 cards, and I stuck a dry erase board on the door to the garage, so I can write notes there, too.</p>

<p>On a side note, give yourself time to adjust. I went from running two households (my mom was ill), juggling a husband and 5 yr old into all the things that happen when you are helping with the 24/7 commitment of home care. When mom died, I couldn’t keep groceries in my house and no one had clean clothes. The structure I had built and relied on for all those years was gone. It took a while to adjust, and the adjustment was more than a little uneven. Thankfully DD was 5 and thought it was an adventure; and DH just rolled with it all.</p>

6

<p>Maybe you have taken on too many things, and should cut back on them. Just reading your post made me spin. Just because people ask, doesn’t mean you have to say yes.</p>

7

<p>Good suggestions. Geekmom, I’ll check into those calendars and especially see about getting them to work with my phone. I am sure I’ll have the same problem as you with “obeying” what the calendar says to do.</p>

<p>Mom2M, that’s a good idea about grouping responsibilities. Instead of saying I need to do 2 hours per day of work on our business, I should probably just block off a day to do that each week and try to ignore the other things. That’s very interesting about how you had a harder time when your amount of responsibility actually decreased because you didn’t have the structure. Come to think of it, I always get a whole lot more done when I’m working against a deadline.</p>

<p>NewHope, I’ll bet I can find that book at Half-price Books. I will check on it. Sometimes you need to read things like that to help you have a fresh perspective.</p>

<p>GA2012, I am glad you said that. I was just asked to do a children’s lesson thing every Tuesday morning at church while the young moms have their Bible study. I would really like to do it, but with travel time and all, I’d be away from home almost 5 hours. I am still praying about that one, but you are right…you can’t do everything, even every good thing.</p>